In today's society, there are really few marriages in which both husband and wife have a sense of happiness, and more are marriage relationships with only family affection and no love. Under the traditional culture of "family ugliness is not publicized", there are many broken marriages, relationships between taste and wax chewing, and even strange emotional phenomena.
This is Ms. Li Zhongying's classic analysis of contemporary marriage.
Born in 1946, Li Zhongying is a native of Hong Kong and an international NLP master in the Chinese world.
In the book, Ms. Li Zhongying breaks many traditional concepts of "how it should be", allowing readers to see the true face of intimate relationships, and also providing more practical and effective thinking and behavior patterns. According to the confusion encountered by people in modern society about love and marriage, it is more clearly and sharply interpreted, which provides more reference value for the development of people's intimate relationships.
In an intimate relationship, whether it is a lover or a husband and wife, the identity of two people must be equal. On the basis of equality, effective communication will help us to build a harmonious and happy relationship.
Seven communication skills for partners to get along:
The first communication skill: to talk with sincerity.
Communication without sincerity will make people feel perfunctory. Husbands and wives must maintain communication with each other, communicate with enough sincerity, and do not talk about anything with irritability, anger, anxiety, and worry, which can easily lead to conflicts and make things more difficult to deal with.
The second communication skill: support your partner, even if he doesn't do it perfectly.
In front of everyone, when your partner says something wrong, don't correct him right away. You should wait until there are only two people at home and both of them are in a positive emotional state. When your partner makes decisions or behaviors in certain situations, as long as they do not cause serious consequences (such as breaking the law) or are too costly (such as the loss of a large amount of money), they support him. If you can always support his choice, he will support you in return.
The third communication skill: avoid criticizing and complaining about the other person.
It is extremely unpleasant to live with someone who is always complaining. We can limit the number of times we complain, or buffer it with something else to avoid complaining.
Fourth communication skill: Avoid laughing at your partner.
Two people in a relationship must have equal status in order for a feeling of happiness and contentment to appear. Ridicule can make the other person feel depressed and lose their equal status.
In particular, jokes about a person's physical characteristics or personal information should be avoided.
Fifth communication skill: Avoid chatter.
Chatter between husband and wife does not increase the effect, it only destroys harmony and damages feelings. The way to change is to constantly remind yourself to see more, listen more, and talk less. This allows a person to observe more, master more, and be more popular.
Sixth communication skill: Avoid getting to the bottom of things.
If your partner doesn't want to say it, don't force him to say it. No matter what is involved, we need to respect each other's space, not control each other. All curiosity is really just trying to control the other person's performance.
Seventh communication skill: Avoid bargaining.
Emotional relationship is not a business, if you use the attitude of buying and selling to deal with the dispute between the two, then it is difficult to succeed, and it will inevitably cause trauma to the relationship.
Because in the material world, anything can be put at a monetary price, but love and love cannot be measured in money.