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You don't have to fall in love with someone, and you can be very free when you're alone, there's nothing wrong with it, and you don't feel inappropriate.
But once you fall in love with a man, your eyes are all about him, but he suddenly doesn't contact you, and his shadow no longer appears in your life, you suddenly can't bear this gap, suffering from gains and losses, and feeling anxious.
This is probably the kind of "loss aversion" principle mentioned in the book, once you get it, you don't want to lose it, and this kind of loss makes it difficult for you to accept, rather than struggling to let go, you should do it.
If a man doesn't contact you, the best thing to do is three words: "whatever".
First, it doesn't matter. Let the facts take their course.
It's hard to say about love, it's true love to love you, it's really not love to love you, sometimes there may be no reason, it's just no feeling.
Together, there is no stimulation, no interest and attraction, and then there is no love. It's like a child who sees a toy he likes, wants it very much, but actually buys it for him. After only playing for a few days, you will lose your freshness, and you will stop playing once you are familiar with it.
Although adults can't be compared to children, and it's not appropriate to compare people with toys, who doesn't think about the same thing.
At most, it is human nature and human instinct to face different objects and goals.
Don't blame men for being heartless and brainless, conforming to human nature, everything is open, only by going with the flow is wisdom, not contacting you, may not love you, there may be other questions, there is no need to ask to understand.
Let yourself be in the attitude of "it doesn't matter", not only is it easy to let go, but your heart will also be open-minded, it is yours and he will come back, it should not be yours, it is useless.
Second, it doesn't matter. Open your heart.
Some women encounter a man who does not contact you, or even finds out that he is cheating, they feel unwilling, either hysterically looking for trouble, or wanton revenge.
This is not advisable, it will only hurt both parties, no relationship is changed suddenly, but the result of long-term accumulation, it may be that there was an emotional problem between you a long time ago, and it was not solved by timely communication, but let it slowly expand.
Even in order to maintain the peace of appearance, he was blind and chose to deceive himself.
Don't wait until you lose it to regret it, what should have happened sooner, it's too late, and it's hard to cover the heat of your cold heart.
At this time, you can't catch up with what you missed, let your heart relax, pretend that "it doesn't matter", as long as you know the reason for the failure of the relationship in your heart.
Managing feelings is also a science, everyone can't only have a relationship to find a lifelong partner, maybe many people grow up in the tempering of feelings, and finally find happiness.
If a man doesn't contact you, he doesn't have to be entangled, his mind is relaxed, and he can talk about the past in order to accommodate the good of the next paragraph.
3. It's okay, do a good job of yourself.
Feelings can not be trusted, they can be lost at any time, they can only rely on themselves, since men do not contact, it is "indifferent", put all their energy on improving themselves.
Feelings are not the whole of life, but there must also be one, and it is good to have good feelings to add color to life.
But it's "okay" to lose a relationship, there is a better relationship waiting for you, you just need to make yourself better and more perfect, which will naturally attract more excellent men to you.
As Ding Limei said in "Let Every Day See Joy":
The greatest asset in life is yourself. "Only by enriching yourself and letting your life exude its own fragrance can you attract butterflies. ”
There are many things in life that are powerless, and there are many things that you don't want to do, but we all have to learn to be indifferent, go with the flow, and be at ease.
Only when you become excellent can you always be invincible and have the confidence to face all the sudden changes in life.
When a man doesn't contact you, you have an indifferent attitude, don't love, don't love, not to him, there are more good boys waiting for you.