Author |Brief ink.
Title Diagram Visual China.
Cover stills from "Why Sheng Xiaomo".
After being ridiculed as an "uneducated parent", Wen Baoxin searched again for posts related to the topic of "four-character names" on social platforms, and unsurprisingly found that many bloggers had deleted previously posted content.
In her comment area, there are still people who continue to question the two names of "Peng Qingziru" and "Wen Qinglangru", "It's so ugly, drunk", "Why do you want to take a four-character name, it's really hard to hear" and other remarks occupy the high ground in the comment area, and some people will also attack Wen Baoxin's appearance and clothing, "Look at what you are wearing, you don't look like an uneducated person, how can you give your two daughters such a name" and other remarks appeared in the comment area of Wen Baoxin's other posts.
Screenshot of Xiaohongshu).
These doubts made Wen Baoxin briefly fall into anxiety, and she couldn't help but feel angry. She tried to explain the logic behind the name and explained her own coping strategy, "The name is just a code name, if my daughter is troubled by this, I also agree with them to change their name."
But the controversy did not stop there, and someone asked her rhetorically: "It's a good sentence 'change your name if it's a big deal', do you know what kind of discrimination your daughter will be subjected to before changing your name?"Your irresponsible behavior will end up with countless people to cover for you, and your children's school status, insurance, including future bank cards, social security, etc., involve countless people. ”
Wen Baoxin didn't understand this, she said: "I just gave my daughter a four-character name, why was she cyberbullied?."”
Pull and pull up the word count".
When browsing the information about the four-character name on the Internet, Wen Baoxin has seen many posts, and the most impressive one is that an adult man changed his name to "Zhao Yuyu Island".
Although these four seemingly unrelated and slightly awkward words were once ridiculed by netizens as "the most strange name", Zhao Yudao himself explained in the post that he likes the new name very much, because it is easy to remind people of "an island full of clouds, fragrant and dense plants".
"Wonderful" is a very common evaluation of four-character names on the Internet, among which those netizens who are not ethnic minorities and non-compound surnames, but whose names are four-character are the most vulnerable to criticism, and they are dubbed "uneducated", "very ugly", "stiff and hard to make up the number of words" and other negative comments.
Screenshot of Xiaohongshu).
Wen Baoxin was one of the people who were ridiculed, and the reason for the ridicule was that after she gave birth to two daughters, she used "Peng Qingziru" and "Wen Qinglangru" as the names of her two daughters.
The difference is that when many bloggers deleted posts due to ridicule from netizens, Wen Baoxin still refused to delete the posts. She explained her insistence like this: "Even if the post is deleted, netizens may continue to talk about it." ”
When they first named their children, Wen Baoxin and her husband did not deliberately ask for four characters, "Peng Langru" and "Wen Qingru" were the initial choices. Among them, "Peng" is the surname of the child's father, and "Wen" is the surname of Wen Baoxin.
Later, it became four characters, because she and her husband felt that compared with "Langru", the momentum and meaning of "Qingru" seemed to be a little weak, the former gave people a hearty and comfortable feeling, while the latter added a sense of weakness. So before the name was officially determined, Wen Baoxin and her husband were most entangled in how to make the name "Qingru" more powerful.
Picture "Ordinary Years").
It was finally decided to add the word "Zi" to the name, which has a lot to do with the speaking habits of the city where Wen Baoxin is located. She lives with her husband in Hubei, and the locals unconsciously add the word "zi" when they speak, such as "What are you doing?"In real life, it becomes "What are you doing?".”。
In addition, Wen Baoxin and her husband often tease each other as "old women" or "old husbands" in their lives. Gradually, her husband began to inadvertently chant "Wen Qing Ruzi" and "Peng Qing Ziru".
When Wen Baoxin heard it, he felt that it seemed okay to add the word "sub" to his name, and it gave people a feeling of being at ease like the wind. Later, they chose the word "Zi" for "tirelessly", and "Peng Langru" also became "Peng Qingziru", and "Wen Qingru" also became "Wen Qinglangru".
Until they shared their daughter's name on the Internet, Wen Baoxin and her husband never felt that the names of their two daughters were unpleasant.
In her opinion, most of the reason why netizens criticize is because they are unwilling to understand the meaning behind the name. "Of course, even if they do, they may still say, 'You are elegant, but you make children laugh at'. Wen Baoxin said.
That person is a student with a four-character name."
Wen Baoxin's speculation was confirmed in Xu Ruodanqing's childhood experience. When she was a child, Xu Ruodanqing didn't like her name: one was that the name was too long, there were too many strokes, and it was very difficult to write;The second is that every time the teacher checks her homework or selects someone to endorse it, she is often named by name, which makes Xu Ruodanqing feel very troubled when she was a child.
In addition to this, there is also the reason that four-character names often bring her unwanted attention. At the beginning of the school year, senior students often came to the front of Xu Ruodanqing's classroom, pointed at her through the window or stood by the door, and whispered: "That person is a student with a four-character name." ”
When these scrutinizing or curious eyes gathered, Xu Ruodanqing would be sincerely bored and embarrassed. As a child, she was a little dark and chubby, and these glances seemed to expose all her shortcomings to strangers.
Therefore, whenever she sees an unfamiliar face outside the class, Xu Ruodanqing will unconsciously cover her head, and when she receives express delivery every day, she will also set her name to "Xu Xin". She had wondered more than once why her name was so weird, and not just three or two words like everyone else.
Because of her name, Xu Ruodanqing quarreled with her parents more than once when she was a child, and she couldn't understand why her parents chose such an unconventional name for herself, so that she stood out like a crowd for people to "visit".
The explanation given by the mother was very simple and unexpected. She told Xu Ruodanqing that the name was chosen by a friend she knew for her child, and she copied it exactly because she thought it sounded.
Picture "Little Joy").
For a long time, Xu Ruodanqing was deeply troubled by her mother's subjective feelings. When she was in the first year of junior high school, she had a strong desire to change her name, and this idea did not take a turn until the third year of junior high school. That year, Xu Ruodanqing began to chat and share her daily life online, and she also began to frequently mention her real name to others.
To her surprise, the former doubts gradually turned into praise, and many netizens praised her beautiful name. When he went to high school and learned the two poems "Who has not died in life since ancient times, leaving Dan's heart to take care of his sweat", Xu Ruodanqing began to gradually understand that in addition to being good, the name should actually have a deeper meaning. She also began to understand that people had different levels of acceptance of "wonderful" names at different times.
When I was a child, people paid more attention to a person's name, probably focusing more on the number of words, the number of strokes, the pitch and whether the glyphs are good-looking, etc., and paid little attention to the meaning behind the name. But as an adult, people began to pay attention to the meaning behind the name. ”
But Xu Ruodanqing also said that if he gives birth to offspring in the future, there is a high probability that he will add a certain word after his surname to form a name, "It's good to be simple, and it's not bad to be obscure."
Picture "The Day of Chasing the Light").
Different from Xu Ruodanqing's experience, although Lu Yuan Ji Ming also has a four-character name, he rarely receives extra attention from his classmates or teachers, and he is not resistant to naming his descendants with a four-character name.
Lu Yuan Ji Ming is 32 years old this year, a native of Anhui Province, and among his peers, it is rare to see people with a single surname but a four-character name. Therefore, since he was a student, he was often asked what the meaning of his name was, why it was a four-character name, whether his name was a stage name, etc.
The answer was obtained by Lu Yuan Ji Ming from his parents - before he was born, his parents agreed that if it was a girl, he would follow his mother's surname "Ji", and the word "Ming" would mean "a blockbuster";If it is a boy, he will follow his father's surname "Lu", and the single word "far" means "Lu Yao knows horsepower". "It's just that later my parents felt that the meaning of the two names was good, so they combined it to become 'Lu Yuan Ji Ming'. Lu Yuan Ji Ming said.
It seems that the niche name does not increase the confusion of Lu Yuan Ji Ming's life, on the contrary, the name invisibly saves him a lot of trouble, such as he does not have to worry about the same name as the wanted person, and when registering a company or obtaining a driver's license, he does not have to go through duplicate checks repeatedly. Previously, when I went to the ** agency to handle business, the staff searched the number of people with the same name as Lu Yuan Ji Ming in the system, and the final result was zero.
Lu Yuan Ji Ming feels that four-character names will become a new wave in the future. But he also said that if you start from your own feelings, you may not be able to accept a five-character name or a six-character name at this time. He believes that names that are too long are not suitable for writing and are not easy to communicate with.
Listen to the persuasion of netizens and give him another name
Parent Hu Xiaoxia's views coincide with Lu Yuan Ji Ming. In her opinion, everything is progressive, and the name has undergone an evolution from a single-character name to a two-character name, and it is possible that it will evolve into a four-character name in the future. People do not currently accept four-character names that are not compound surnames, perhaps because they are not used to it, or because the number of four-character names is too limited.
Hu Xiaoxia, who lives in Xinjiang, quickly became one of the most criticized parents after sharing her daughter's name a few days ago, and she and her husband were questioned and ridiculed by everyone as "the feeling that the husband and wife can't make up a high school diploma."
Hu Xiaoxia's daughter's name is "Zhang and Gu Yue", among them, "Zhang" is her husband's surname, and "Gu Yue" is derived from her surname "Hu". Under Hu Xiaoxia's post, the comment at the top of the list was "Why not call it 'Gong Changhekou Guyue'", and the replies to the comments were almost all voices of approval, and some people mocked Hu Xiaoxia, "To dismantle and dismantle together, 'Zhang and Guyue' are not special enough."
Hu Xiaoxia has gone through most of the comments, but has never replied to anyone, she just shares her daughter's growth process online as always, and one of the headlines is "Mom wants you to grow up healthy and happy."
Picture "Little Joy").
This attitude of staying out of the matter and letting others ridicule make many netizens die down, but there are still people who keep leaving messages, questioning her stubbornly dragging her parents' surnames and naming her daughter.
Hu Xiaoxia is reluctant to pay attention to and ignore these voices, and the idea of combining her father's surname with her mother's surname has taken root a few years ago. At that time, Hu Xiaoxia noticed a singer named "Yang and Su" on the Internet, and the other party's practice of combining the surname "Yang" with the surname "Su" as a name instantly attracted her attention.
It was then that the idea of combining her own surname with her husband's to name her daughter came to her.
In the process of choosing a name for their daughter, Hu Xiaoxia and her husband considered a combination of names, and they agreed to directly combine the surnames "Zhang" with "Hu" and name their daughter "Zhang and Hu", but it seems to be unpoetic and too straightforward, and the name seems to be quite masculine.
When asked why she didn't name her daughter "Zhang Guyue", Hu Xiaoxia said: "It may be influenced by the word 'and' in 'Yang and Su', and I think it will be more unique to use the conjunction 'and'." ”
Picture "Little Joy").
Although she named her daughter after a four-character character, in real life, Hu Xiaoxia had only come into contact with a classmate with a four-character name in junior high school, and that was a girl with beautiful looks and outstanding grades, and the other party's name was "Ma Qi Huizi".
At that time, when classmates called Ma Qi Huizi, they would simply call each other "Huizi", and rarely called "Qi Huizi". In Hu Xiaoxia's view, excellent grades and excellent character are the main reasons why Ma Qihuizi has attracted attention and can be remembered immediately after a few years, and the name factor only plays an auxiliary role.
Regarding netizens' worries about "children will be nicknamed when they grow up" or "become the focus of teachers", Hu Xiaoxia said that these factors were not thought of when the name was named.
In her life experience, it seems to be a norm for classmates to nickname each other, and the ** of nicknames can be related to appearance, behavior, and may also be closely related to accent, family background, etc. "When I was a child, my classmates called me 'Hu Daya', but in fact, my teeth were not big. Hu Xiaoxia said.
September 1, 2020, Lu'an, Anhui Province. Two new elementary school students introduce their names to each other. (Photo: Visual China).
After the post sharing her daughter's name attracted widespread attention, Jia Guoruien's mother also contacted Hu Xiaoxia through a private message. She comforted Hu Xiaoxia: "Don't care about the remarks of netizens, they have been particularly sensitive to four-character names recently." ”
Hu Xiaoxia is not sensitive to the remarks of netizens, but recently she and her husband have also decided to give their daughter a new name "Zhang He Guyue", because Hu Xiaoxia feels that "Zhang He Guyue" is more elegant and formal, and can avoid the embarrassment of "Zhang and Hu" when her daughter writes her name in the future. What's more, the character "He" was calculated by her and her husband based on their daughter's birthday.
The daughter's name is not the only one in the family that has been counted. Hu Xiaoxia's husband's original name was "Zhang Yu", because the word "jade" was duplicated with the names of the elders in the family, so when her husband was in junior high school, he changed his name to "Zhang Yunhai" according to his birthday.
At that time, the husband already had a school record, and after changing his name, he had to go through a series of file changes. After her daughter's new name was confirmed, Hu Xiaoxia decided to deal with the name change as soon as possible, on the one hand, to simplify the procedure, and on the other hand, it was related to the advice of the naming master - "The word 'he' is not suitable for your daughter, the sooner you change your name, the better." ”
Later, when browsing the Internet for information, Hu Xiaoxia accidentally found that Jia Guoruien's mother also said that she would listen to the persuasion of netizens and change the name of "Jia Guoruien" and give him another name.
Original title: Just give a four-character name to your child, why do you have to "listen to persuasion"?
This article was first published in the 650th issue of the new weekly "Knife Point".
Operations: Hee-hee.
Typesetting: Yang Fang.