Aunt Li is a very traditional mother who has worked hard all her life in raising children, and she often puts a sentence on her lips: "When the children are married, my task will be completed." ”
Who would have thought that she would wait until a pair of children got married, and a wife was married, but Aunt Li didn't take a good position because of her lack of experience in dealing with her in-laws, which made the three families upset.
Aunt Li is a straightforward person, I thought that my daughter-in-law would be a family when she entered the door, and the family naturally did not need to be so restrained, and when she had a reunion dinner for the first time, Aunt Li inadvertently chatted with her daughter-in-law's mother.
When it came to the recent situation of her children, Aunt Li unconsciously praised her son-in-law, saying that the gift given by her son-in-law was more in line with her heart.
In fact, the daughter-in-law also gave a gift, but Aunt Li took the paper as the topic, and the daughter-in-law's mother, who has always been sensitive, was instantly unhappy.
Aunt Li complained about her son and daughter-in-law's preparation for pregnancy, Aunt Li worked hard, but her daughter-in-law's stomach did not move, Aunt Li was in a hurry to hug her grandson one by one, and said that her daughter-in-law was not young.
When the daughter-in-law's mother heard this, her face turned blue and she directly made an excuse to terminate the conversation. Aunt Li didn't take it seriously, she believed whatever her daughter-in-law's mother said, and didn't think much about it at all.
Afterwards, when I went home after eating, my son and daughter-in-law had a conflict on the road, Aunt Li ran to persuade her, and saw that her daughter-in-law refused to leave on the road, Aunt Li couldn't help but said to her daughter-in-law: "You two have something to do and quarrel when you go home." ”
Unexpectedly, this statement added fuel to the fire, and the daughter-in-law turned her head and left, causing her son to complain to Aunt Li: "Mom, if you can't speak, you shut up, and no one treats you as a dumb person, so you are causing me trouble." ”
Aunt Li felt very disappointed and sad when she saw her son put on a face for her, she felt that she had always been for her son's good, but now her "kindness" was regarded as a "donkey's liver and lungs" by her son.
So Aunt Li was dissatisfied and complained about her daughter-in-law's family, and her daughter-in-law lived at home for less than a month before she made a fuss about moving out.
The relatives and friends who made trouble all knew about it, and they all came to ask Aunt Li if there was a conflict between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but the problem was that Aunt Li didn't know where the contradiction came from, and they didn't know what to say when she asked her son and daughter-in-law.
When her daughter and son-in-law came back, Aunt Li was full of enthusiasm, and she took the initiative to help clean up her daughter's room and prepare meals for her son-in-law every day.
This obvious contrast made the son and daughter-in-law feel very uncomfortable, and the daughter and son-in-law didn't appreciate it, and the daughter even bluntly asked Aunt Li not to enter the couple's room casually.
Aunt Li was cold, her daughter never cleaned up the room before marriage, and every time Aunt Li tidied it up, her daughter was still very grateful to Aunt Li, how could she change when she got married.
When Aunt Li was sulking, the son-in-law's parents called Aunt Li to go over to eat, and saw that the son-in-law's mother was busy in the kitchen alone, and Aunt Li couldn't help but run to help.
The daughter pulled Aunt Li aside and reminded Aunt Li that she was a guest, but Aunt Li didn't listen, but instead taught her daughter: "It's all a family, your mother-in-law is so hard alone, I can help if you can't help." ”
Aunt Li took the initiative to invite Ying, worked hard to make a few dishes, and after serving them on the table, the relatives on the side of her son-in-law's parents didn't eat a bite, and stared at each one with big eyes.
Aunt Li thought that people were embarrassed, and smiled and beckoned people to eat more, thinking of drinking two glasses of wine to liven up the atmosphere, but no one was drinking, and finally the son-in-law's parents finished the meal with an embarrassed face.
It was the first time for the in-laws to meet, Aunt Li actually made the two in-laws dissatisfied, and the son and daughter also complained in various ways, and even if Aunt Li took the initiative to contact her, the in-laws on both sides were ignorant of it.
Aunt Li was very distressed, so she asked for help from several of her old sisters, all of whom were battle-hardened spirits, and after their analysis, Aunt Li woke up.
As summarized by the sisters"3 don't move, 2 don't touch".Principles to followFamily interaction,FinallyrelationshipReallyIt's getting better and better
Don't be angry, the in-laws are the in-laws, be generous in everything, one yard to one yard, don't pull the children's affairs into the in-laws, smile more, respect more, and be more enthusiastic;
Don't move the cup, you are a guest in your in-laws, don't be anti-guest-oriented, it's best not to drink and look foreign, and don't get drunk and stay overnight to cause trouble and annoyance;
Don't be curious, don't ask about the family affairs of your in-laws, keep your distance, don't come and go too often, and don't meddle.
Don't touch the sore spots of your in-laws, don't show off and compare, praise your in-laws' children more, and don't give suggestions and requests to your in-laws
Don't touch your children's private affairs, you must have a sense of boundaries, and don't care if your children don't ask their parents for help, and don't let their parents interfere. Multiple children should have a bowl of water, communicate more when there is something, and don't be blindly suspicious.
Aunt Li memorized it by heart, and after seriously comprehending it, she took advantage of her daughter-in-law's filial piety to express her liking on a circle of friends, and also sent a private message to her daughter-in-law's mother, sent a special product, and said a few good words about her daughter-in-law.
After Aunt Li stopped meddling in the big and small matters between her son and daughter-in-law, her daughter-in-law never mentioned moving out, and the daughter-in-law's mother invited Aunt Li over for dinner within a few days.
After her daughter and son-in-law returned home, Aunt Li did not make any special moves, nor did she touch the children's rooms casually. Aunt Li has restrained care, but it makes her daughter apologize, and her son-in-law respects her more.
Later, Aunt Li specially asked her son-in-law to apologize generously, saying that she just wanted to help her son-in-law's mother that day, and had no other meaning, and the mother-in-law took the initiative to lower her posture, and the son-in-law naturally couldn't get along with her mother-in-law.
It was originally well-intentioned, and he didn't do anything bad, so this matter will be over with a little explanation.
In the end, Aunt Li also summarized a more important criterion, children become a family, which means that they are the masters, and parents should take the initiative to take a back seat, put their minds on themselves, and don't keep rushing to their children's small homes to find existence.
You must not belittle your children, let alone say something like "I have eaten more salt than you have walked", the more you want your children to be obedient, the more rebellious your children will be.
Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, and after the children get married, in the new family relationship, the parents respect everything, do not express their opinions, and be the backers behind the children.
Thank you for your attention, update the emotional, life, and workplace stories of the middle-aged and elderly every day, and hope to be a calm person in the short and secular relationship of parents, and the older you are, the more open-minded you are.
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