What is Experience?
The so-called experience is the interpretation of real experience, that is, what ideas, theories, hidden advantages and disadvantages, and which laws can optimize our social performance through our own experience. From the feedback of behaviors and results, summarize the behavior patterns that are suitable for you, and put them into the next round of practice.
Not all experiences are good, and the same experience plays a very different role in different contexts, it is just a pattern of behavior that allows us to respond more effectively and safely to reality in a given environment. Just as we know not to touch a glass that has just been filled with boiling water with our hands, and not to jump from more than three meters away.
Many of the knee-jerk reactions and judgments in daily life are often based on our accumulated experience. It's like when we first start driving and remind ourselves stiffly: three laps here, two laps here, and the horn must be honked here. After being familiar with it, it will be "one person and vehicle", and all operations are subconscious behaviors, but they are more accurate and timely. The same is true for our life experience, which is panicked at first, and after becoming familiar with it, it will form an inertia that we are not even aware of, which will invisibly affect our thinking and behavior. For example, many people will blame their current character flaws on their original family, confined to a state of inertia and unable to escape, and call it fate. It is not surprising that fatalism has a large number of adherents, because our genes and early experiences create a kind of survival inertia for us. If a person wants to change his fate, he must have a thorough insight into his own strengths and problems, and use enough long-term and powerful energy to fight against the heavy inertia created by genes and experience.
Where does this energy come from?It stems from the fact that we must live in the present, get rid of the shackles of the past thinking, and interpret reality correctly. For example, if you are disappointed in your parent-child relationship by your family of origin, then before you want to build your own parent-child relationship, you must make your present independent from the past, or even separate, through objective observation and learning, and cultivate new experiences under the new and correct perspective.
In my past life experience, a small degree of growth comes from continuous self-affirmation, but a huge leap comes from complete self-denial. When we thoroughly interpret the inertia in our genes, the defects in our cognitive structure, the imperfections in our personality and human nature, and deny ourselves at that stage without relenting, it is like throwing off the fat of our body, moving forward lightly, and being vigorous and determined.
Those strong people who can achieve "no punishment for a gentleman" in the ups and downs of life often have a strong ability to "squeeze" life experience, and their insight into the world is nuanced and extremely sensitive. What you see is what you think, what you think is what you learn, and what you learn is what you use. They are good at seeking spiritual nourishment from setbacks, groping for social laws from changes, constantly adjusting themselves, interpreting the objectivity and accuracy of the world, and applying what they have learned.
There is a kind of experience called extreme experience, and extreme experience cannot be obtained from ordinary life, but must be gushed out of extreme experience. Many people who have achieved great things have gained extreme experience from extreme experiences, which are scarce. Many people with great achievements have some special experiences in their early years, although these experiences are not as explicit and easy to measure as academic qualifications and work history, but they squeeze out their extreme experience. Extreme experience is like a kind of "privilege" in ability, which allows a person to stand out from a group of people with similar qualifications to himself, and have the strength to achieve more.