When it comes to adolescence, I believe most parents will have headaches, because adolescence seems to be a troublesome and rebellious period. How can parents live in harmony with their adolescent children?What parents can do to raise their adolescent children to be independent adults. When children have problems such as procrastination, Internet addiction, rebellion, and poor Xi performance, how can parents help their children solve them?
Kevin, a world-renowned psychologist. Dr. Lyman will help you really get into your child's inner world, and his book "Reconciling with Adolescence" will solve these difficult problems.
The author, Kevin Lehman, is a New York Times bestselling author and a well-known American psychologist, has served as a special family psychological consultant for the "Good Morning America" program, and has been invited to be a guest on popular American talk shows, and the book "Reconciling with Adolescence" has sold hundreds of thousands of copies around the world.
Kevin Lehman has five children, he has witnessed five adolescences, and none of his children have rebelled and have grown up very well. The ages of 11 to 19 are a strangely unrepeatable period of time, and a child's behavior during these years will affect him for the rest of his life.
The author begins by writing that the greatest thing we can do for ourselves and our children is to have a sense of humor, and we need to be a semi-straight line and know how to keep the family in balance, rather than a "**" parent hovering above and monitoring the child's every move.
In the process of raising adolescent children, sometimes you have to stand by their side and stand shoulder to shoulder with them, and sometimes you have to stand opposite them and stand against them, and this book will help us play that role well.
There are three main types of parents: conniving parents, authoritarian parents, and authoritative parents.
Pampering parents.
A conniving parent is the kind of person who is obedient to their children, and they have no rules and boundaries. Because the rules of the game are always changing, family members are insecure and they tend to try to be friends with their children.
But being a good parent does not mean being obedient to your child, you have to firmly say no to your child's unreasonable requests, and if you say you don't plan to do something, then resolutely don't do it, don't give in, no matter how much your child pleads. You have to be tough, or the child can manipulate you in any way.
Authoritarian parents.
This type of parent believes that children should be quiet, obedient, and that they need to be in control and do what they say. There are often disagreements between such parents and other members of the family, and the others have no voice.
Parents should not be in control of their children, but rather encourage and accompany them to see the vision and the big picture. The older your child gets, the more they have their own ideas and opinions, and if you take them seriously, don't think that your own ideas are the only option. Any kind of extreme is dangerous, and balance is the best policy.
Authoritarian parents.
Such parents believe that they are equal to their children, and they know to establish appropriate guidelines and boundaries so that everyone in the family feels safe physically and mentally.
Authoritative parents let their children experience the consequences of their actions, and do not remove the snow from their children's life paths, but they will give their children encouragement with enthusiasm. They yearn for good things, so they often get good results.
The book also analyzes the 72 problems that parents around the world are concerned about when their children are in adolescence, and gives specific coping methods, which I believe will solve the headaches of many parents. For example, when we have an argument with a child, we should pay attention to our attitude, and your encouragement will make all the difference. When we have a knot with our children, we must learn to communicate on an equal footing, so pass on your good attitude and trust in your children!
The authors use a five-day timeline to give parents tips on how to stay calm, lower your standards, and take turns talking. I believe that after reading this book, parents can calmly accompany their children through the critical stage of life - adolescence, and better cultivate their children into physically and mentally healthy adults.
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