When a girlfriend feels that you are perfunctory to her, there can be a variety of reasons. First, you may be showing signs of a lack of interest or attention in your communication, either because your mind is occupied by something else, or it may be because of an inappropriate way of communicating. In addition, there may be some different communication styles that cause her to feel ignored or misunderstood.
On the other hand, you may need to reflect on your communication skills. Did you respond with a lack of expression or a change in tone that made her feel like you didn't really understand her feelings or needs?The underlying reasons may be related to personal experiences, the way emotions are expressed, and the understanding of feelings.
Communication problems may also involve an imbalance in emotional investment. She may expect more emotional support and empathy, and your response may make her feel that this support is insufficient. This could be because you don't fully understand her emotional needs or have trouble showing affection.
Finally, family background, cultural differences, or personal upbringing may also have an impact on how you communicate. Understanding her values and communication expectations, as well as the differences between you, can help you better respond to her needs and thus improve communication.
In summary, to improve communication between you, you need to focus on expression, emotional engagement, and understanding each other's needs, while also considering the influence of personal differences and upbringing. By working together, building a more open and understanding mode of communication can help strengthen our relationship.