In life, do you also have such troubles?
Every time I am faced with a decision, I hesitate and often worry about the choice for a long time, which has a particularly big impact on my life.
Goethe said: "Those who hesitate will never find the best answer, because the opportunity is lost in the moment you hesitate." ”
This quote tells us that hesitation can make us miss opportunities and not make the best choice.
What should I do if I have a hesitant personality and can't make up my mind about doing things?
The 16 words summarized by Zeng Guopan can help you get rid of your hesitation and let you no longer worry about it.
Those 16 words are"Things come to conform, the future is not welcome, there is no miscellaneous, neither love nor love. ”
01 Adapt: Learn to accept reality, don't complain, don't run away
Adaptation means that when something happens, we accept it and don't resist it.
Resistance will make us more anxious, and conforming to reality, abandoning resistance and fear and anxiety, and accepting all possible situations naturally can help us better adapt to various changes.
Zeng Guofan was born in a family of farmers in Hunan Province for generations, and was not smart from an early age.
It is said that one day when he was reciting "The Story of Yueyang Tower", a thief came to the house and wanted to wait for him to sleep before stealing things.
Who knew that the thief fell asleep when he heard him carrying it on his back, and after a few hours passed, he still couldn't memorize it, and the thief couldn't help it, so he recited the whole story directly in front of him.
Zeng Guofan was not discouraged by his clumsiness.
He knew that he didn't have a smart mind, so he accepted that his qualifications were mediocre, and chose to work hard, putting in more effort than ordinary people.
In the end, the hard work paid off, and he realized a counterattack in life and became the first saint of the late Qing Dynasty.
Life is like this, the more you resist reality, the more you are afraid of difficulties, and the more troubles you will have.
When you encounter problems, choose to accept the reality, do not complain, do not escape, and face them with a peaceful attitude, you will get out of the predicament and get the growth you want.
02 The future is not welcome: live in the present and do not worry about the future
We may have a fear of the future, or we may be bound by "long-term planning".
But no matter what, living in the moment is the most important thing.
Zeng Guofan led his troops to fight for more than ten years, and only had the tactic of "forming a tough village and fighting a dumb battle", and he never used a trick to control the enemy.
He is well aware that there are many uncertainties in fighting a war, and it is unrealistic to rely on intrigue to improve the combat effectiveness of the army.
Only by focusing on the present, doing what you can do, and defending the battle with an impregnable defense that is feasible at the moment, can you have a chance to win against the enemy in the future.
No matter how tired the march was every day, when setting up camp, they had to dig two trenches two two meters deep around the camp, and then build two three-meter high walls for defense.
This tactic of his worked very well, providing a solid foundation for later operations and allowing the Hunan army to achieve victory.
If a person wants to achieve great things, he should live in the present, because the future is the fruit of the present, and only by doing the present well can there be a visible future.
03 Stay focused, get rid of distractions
At that time, it was not mixed, which meant not to think too much, to focus on the things in front of you, and not to be distracted by the outside world.
The less focused you are, the easier it is to be distracted by the outside world and become a person who is hesitant to make a choice.
Zeng Guofan's astonishing advancement in his career is inseparable from his focus.
When he first arrived in Beijing, his self-management was extremely poor, and he often had a hammer in the east and a mallet in the west.
He knew that if he wasn't focused, he would eventually achieve nothing.
Then he decided to learn to be a saint and concentrate his spirit on self-management, and he made unremitting efforts for a long time.
Among them, it is worth mentioning that he began to keep a diary at the age of 29 and never stopped, until the day before his death.
Concentration is a key card in life.
Only by staying focused can we be more efficient and more likely to succeed.
04 Not in love: learn to turn the page, the past does not represent the future
If you are not in love, it refers to things that have already passed, and you must learn to turn the page and face it calmly.
Zeng Guofan participated in the scientific examination at the age of 16 and took the examination 7 times.
When he was young, the essay he did in an exam was published in public as a "negative example".
However, he was not defeated by various failures in the past, but reflected on the lessons learned from many failed exams, worked hard, and constantly updated his learning methods, and finally passed the Tongjinshi examination at the age of 28.
At the same time, he was not afraid to be displayed in public by the article, insisted on writing a diary every day, reflecting every day, and finally because of the clear logic of the article he made in the exam, he was exceptionally promoted by Emperor Daoguang.
Mr. Feng Zikai once said that he is not confused and not trapped in love. Don't be afraid of the future, don't think of the past.
Face the past, don't dwell on past successes, and don't be afraid of past failures, the past is not representative of the future.
Learn to let go of the past and live in the present, so that you can not be afraid of the future, and when faced with a choice, you will not retreat, do not escape, and move forward bravely.
I hope that under the guidance of Zeng Guofan's 16 words, we will no longer be trapped by "hesitation", make decisive choices, make wise trade-offs, and achieve the glory of our lives.
Author Gu Yuerutong, a post-80s Libra woman, a novice writer, and a book review enthusiast.
Edited by Dream Clear Sky Slightly Blue.