Endure the calm for a while, take a step back and open the sky. ”
In the world of emotions, we often face a challenge: how to control ourselves from reaching out to that special person?
Let me share some interesting and practical tips.
1. Cooling period: let the enthusiasm cool down slowly
I can't eat hot tofu in a hurry. ”
When you can't resist the urge to reach out to someone, set yourself a cooling-off period first. During this time, allow yourself to miss each other, but resolutely refrain from acting on them.
You can try something new, such as learning a new skill or participating in social activities, to enrich your life and distract yourself.
I have a friend named Xiao Li, and she used to have a crazy crush on a boy. Whenever she wants to connect with someone, she goes to do yoga or paint as a way to distract herself. Eventually, she not only managed to keep herself under control, but also developed a new hobby.
2. Rational thinking: Break the magic circle of emotions
The authorities are confused, and the bystanders are clear. ”
Sometimes, our emotions are bound by a kind of "magic circle" that makes us lose our minds.
At this time, try to look at your own emotions and behaviors from the perspective of a third person.
Ask yourself: What would happen if you did contact someone?Is it worth the risk?
My cousin Xiaoli has a lot of experience in this area. She was once in a tangled relationship, and whenever she wanted to contact the other person, she would make a list of pros and cons and rationally analyze her behavior. In the end, she made a wise choice and gained peace of mind.
3. Look for alternative behaviors: Turn impulses into motivation
Seon lost his horse, but he didn't know if it was a blessing. When you feel like you have to connect, try to find alternative behaviors. For example, writing a journal, going for a run, or having a conversation with a trusted friend. These behaviors can help you release emotional stress and avoid making irrational decisions on impulse.
My colleague Xiao Wang has an interesting method. Whenever he wanted to contact his ex-girlfriend, he would go to the gym and "abuse" himself. Not only did it release excess energy, but it also trained a good figure. "The sweat and pain made me wake up to the fact that some connections are unnecessary," he said. ”
4. Set goals: Take a long-term view of the problem
The scenery should be long-sighted. In emotional entanglements, we tend to be short-sighted. Setting a long-term goal, such as improving your career skills and planning a trip, can help you see the bigger picture of your current problems. When you focus your attention on achieving these goals, the urge to reach out to the other person will naturally wane.
A friend of mine decided to put his energy into his work after a breakup. She set goals for career advancement and worked towards them. Not only has he made remarkable achievements in his work, but he has also successfully stepped out of the haze of emotion.
5. Accept reality: Some connections are destined to end in failure
There are times in life when you have to have it, and there are times in life when you don't want it. Some relationships are destined to last long, and some ties will eventually be broken. Accepting reality doesn't mean giving up on the effort, but learning to let go when the time is right. When you really accept and understand this, you will find that it is not difficult to control yourself from reaching out.
One of my relatives finally chose to let go after a fruitless relationship. "When I realized that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't change the outcome, I chose to accept reality," she said. At that moment, I felt like I was free. ”
Conclusion:
If life is only as first seen, what is the autumn wind and sad fan. Controlling not actively connecting is an emotional maturity and wisdom.
By using these tips and strategies, we can better manage our emotions and behaviors and live a more harmonious and beautiful life. Remember, true happiness often comes from inner peace and self-sufficiency.