In modern society, as parents, we all have the good wish of "hoping that our sons will become dragons and our daughters will become phoenixes", and we are eager for our children to have a good career and be able to enter prestigious schools. However, as children enter school, mothers' sense of competition and anxiety are gradually revealed, and their expectations for their children's education are gradually rising.
One day after school, mothers at the school gate got together to chat and share their homeschooling experiences. Jiajia's mother sighed: "It's really hard for our Jiajia to go home to do homework, all kinds of frictions, and I have to complete all kinds of check-in tasks from teachers in the parent group every day, which is really depressing." I have to accompany her to learn dance and painting on weekends, don't let her learn anything, now the children are like this, I am afraid that it will be difficult for her to even get into a good school in the future. Alas!Usually teachers ask too much, and it's really tiring to be a parent!How did your family deal with it, share it. ”
Another mom responded, "Haha, you're so right. Just now, the teacher sent out today's memorization and dictation for parents to sign. I used to be relatively calm, but after joining the parent circle, I was always more calm than this, and I couldn't be calm. No, I also applied for the piano exam for our Zihang. Zihang's mother answered: "Yes, Zihang is going to take the piano exam." How many levels are there?Jiajia's mother asked curiously.
Just as everyone was chatting lively, Jiajia happily ran over to find her mother. Before Jiajia could speak, Jiajia's mother said: "Jiajia, you see that Zihang is preparing for the piano exam, you are not happy to learn to paint and dance a folk dance, compared with Zihang, you are much simpler." ”
When Jiajia heard this, her little face suddenly drooped, and she muttered: "As far as his difficulty is concerned, how easy it is for me to learn!."Jiajia's mother ignored Jiajia's emotions and continued to ask, "Do you have a lot of homework today?"Jiajia said angrily: "I don't have much homework that day, I'm tired of doing my homework, and I have to dance and paint." I don't even have time to play. ”
Jiajia's mother reprimanded unhappily: "You kid is just ignorant, mom, it's all for your good!."If you don't work hard now, when you suffer a loss in the future, you won't have a place to cry if you lose at the starting line!Jiajia said aggrievedly: "But I don't like to dance, and I don't like to draw." ”
Jiajia's mother said impatiently: "What do you like or dislike, I think you are just playful and don't want to learn!."Why don't you kid know so much, it's all for your good!As her mother became impatient, she hurriedly urged Jiajia to go home and do her homework.
Jiajia lowered her head and reluctantly followed her mother away. Jiajia's mother loves Jiajia deeply, but she doesn't know much about what Jiajia really likes, and she pays more attention to Jiajia's achievements and future. In her mother's eyes, Jiajia's academic performance is her primary concern. "It's all for your good" has become a mantra that Jiajia's mother often says when Jiajia does not "cooperate".
Jiajia's mother may be out of her own life experience, trying to guide Jiajia to avoid detours. However, in the parent-child relationship, it is essential to communicate equally and understand the child's inner needs and thoughts. Guidance should be guided by children's experiences and desires, so that children can feel happy in their school Xi and life, and receive education in a relaxed and happy state of mind. Only in such an environment will children be more willing to learn Xi, and it will be easier for them to understand and cooperate with their parents.
On the road to cultivating children's success, parents must have the right positioning. The responsibility of parents is not to help their children learn to improve their Xi scores, help teachers change their children's homework, force their children to pursue high rankings, or must have a prestigious school degree, etc. The only thing parents should do is to discover their children's unique selves, discover their children's unique endowments, strengths, interests, and hobbies, and then encourage their children to discover and realize themselves.
Only by cultivating children's life safety, health and happiness, and developing self-adaptability as the primary task, parents can accompany their children in a timely manner, encourage and cultivate their children's strengths and interests, let them embark on a path of self-development, and teach their children to become themselves, so that they can finally make their children become happy people.
What is happiness?Happiness is about finding something you love doing and making it your career. You do what you like to do for eight hours and you're happy. The other aspect of happiness is finding someone you like, living with him or her, experiencing the little moments of growth in your life together, and feeling happy beyond those eight hours.
Help children learn to be a happy person 24 hours a day, is this really "hoping for a son to become a dragon, hoping for a woman to become a phoenix"?Follow me, share a little parenting knowledge every day, be a better parent, and help your children become talents.