Psychologist If your child is over this age, don t pick up other people s old clothes to wear

Mondo Psychological Updated on 2024-01-31

Wen Jing's mother

I used to have a colleague who really likes to buy clothes, every timeThe first thing you do is go shopping and buy clothesAfter she bought clothes, she often wore them once or twice, and I picked up her clothes to wear at that time, but I generally didn't want to wear them after wearing them once or twice. Because her vision is not the same as mine, the clothes that suit her may not necessarily fit me.

Later, after I gave birth, my grandmother picked up a lot of clothes for our child to wear, and I wore them for him when he was one or two years old.

Later, when I went to study as a counselor, the teacher who gave us a lecture mentioned itThe child's sensitive period, when referring to the sensitive period of children, he mentioned:When a child is over two years old, he will slowly enter an aesthetic sensitive period

The so-called aesthetic sensitive period isChildren begin to have aesthetic requirements for themselves and the environment, develop a strong interest in their own clothing and clothing, and care very much about their own image, I am very interested in all the beautiful things in life and pursue perfection.

Psychologists say that at this time, mothers should stop wearing old clothes for their children, becauseMost of the old clothes don't look good enough, and the old clothes for children may be big or small, which is not conducive to the formation of children's correct aesthetics.

Later, when I was reading a psychology book, I mentioned a noun calledA sense of unworthiness. The book also mentions:When children are young, if parents often wear other people's old clothes for their children, it will make them feel that their lives are about to be completed, will wear other people's old clothes, and slowly the child will grow up to feel unworthy, he is not worthy, he is only worthy.

Therefore, it is recommended that after the child is two years old, he will slowly begin to be sensible, and after he has self-awareness, he should not wear old clothes for the child, so that the child knows that he is the best, and gives him the good clothes he wants.

And in psychology there is anotherChildhood revenge compensatory psychology.

Mothers don't buy new clothes for their children when they are young, they all give their children to wear other people's old clothes, which is especially obviousIn a two-child and three-child family, the second and third children will wear the clothes of the older brothers and sisters in front of them, and they are rarely able to buy new clothes to wear.

This will lead to the child growing up crazy to buy clothes, just like my colleague who likes to buy clothes, she mentioned that she wanted to buy her own new clothes when she was young, but she could only buy them during the Chinese New Year, and she usually wore the leftover clothes worn by her sister, so she now goes to work to make money and likes to buy clothes. It's a kind of childhood compensation.

I knew a colleague who drank milk tea every day, and I said, is this milk tea really so delicious?

He brought up what happened when he was a childWhen he was a child, he went to school and saw his classmates drinking milk tea, and he really wanted to drink it, so he told his mother that he wanted to drink milk tea.

And his mother said to him, "Milk tea is full of saccharin and caffeine, which is not conducive to growing taller and not conducive to physical health, never buy it for him, and also limit his pocket money, so that he can't buy milk tea. So heThere is an obsession in my heartNow that I can be independent, I drink milk tea every day.

SoIt is recommended that before the child is two years old, if he knows the old clothes of people who love cleanliness, he can wear them for his children, because at this time the children grow up quickly, and a piece of clothing may only be worn for two or three months.

But after the child is two years old, try not to wear old clothes for the child, so as to avoid the child growing up to feel unworthy, unconfident, or have childhood compensatory behavior.

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