Two months after my mother-in-law came to the house to escape the summer, I cut off the monthly subsidy of 6,000 yuan for my son and spent 3 million yuan to buy a house and lie down
My surname is Ye, I am 48 years old and I work as a sales manager in a foreign company. My husband is also in a state-owned enterprise, and his position is relatively high. Our family conditions are relatively good, there are two children, the eldest son is a junior this year and goes to school in a 985 in Guangzhou. The youngest daughter graduated from junior high school and started high school this year.
The eldest son usually lives in the school and only comes home during the winter and summer vacations. He studied in provincial key high school and had excellent grades, so we always believed that he could be admitted to a good university. But last year, he only took one or two books in the college entrance examination, and we didn't say anything, thinking that it was a key university, at least he worked hard to get in.
But what surprised us was that after the start of school, my son often called home and said that he needed living expenses. At first, it cost 3,000 yuan a month, and later it became 5,000 yuan a monthWe also all give, thinking that maybe the living expenses in high school are not enough to spend, and when I go to college, I need to buy a computer and rent a house or something, so it is normal to spend more.
In this way, in the freshman and sophomore years, we paid 5,000 to our son every month. When I went home during the winter and summer vacations, I felt that my son had also changed, and I was impatient to talk to us, and the boss had a face.
This year, my son is a junior, and since March, he has called ** and said that 5,000 yuan a month is not enough, at least 6,000 yuan. I discussed with my husband and felt that my son's living expenses at school might have increased, so I gave him 6,000 yuan every month.
In July, my mother-in-law said she wanted to come to our house for two months. Usually I don't have a good relationship with my mother-in-law, and her wife is temperamental and nagging. I told my husband that it would be troublesome for my mother-in-law to come for these two months. My husband said that it would only be two months, so let's let my mother-in-law come.
After my mother-in-law came, I found that she was much quieter than before, no longer nagging, and often helped me with household chores. I thought it was because the relationship between my mother-in-law and daughter-in-law had eased.
At the end of August, my son suddenly said that he needed 10,000 yuan for living expenses this time. I discussed with my husband and thought it was too outrageous, so I asked my mother-in-law for her opinion. The mother-in-law said that her son went to college, and the living expenses would naturally be more, so she would give it.
I'm still wondering how much my mother-in-law cares about her son. Until one day, I passed by my mother-in-law's room and heard that there was a ** inside, and when I heard it carefully, it was actually my mother-in-law scolding her son, and she also mentioned the cost of living.
I heard my mother-in-law say outside the door: "I have been at your grandmother's house for two months, and you have asked for an increase in living expenses, you are really greedy, bullying the weak and afraid of the hard!".Your grandmother is too good to you, are you worthy?If you eat at school and wait for death, why should you ask for living expenses. This time you will be given 10,000, you don't come to me for money in the future!”
I'm confused, what the hell is going on?My mother-in-law didn't even tell me that she secretly gave her son living expenses. I opened my son's room and dug out his account book, only to know that in addition to the living expenses we gave him, my mother-in-law had been secretly giving him living expenses in the past few years.
I reasoned with my mother-in-law, and my mother-in-law confessed. It turned out that she felt that we were too strict with our son, and we had to blame our son for not being able to do it in the last two books. She secretly financed her son to avoid our accusations.
Only then did I understand why my son was so disrespectful recently, it turned out that he had his mother-in-law as a backer. My mother-in-law didn't tell us, so that he misunderstood that we had money for him to spend.
After my mother-in-law left, I had a serious conversation with my husband about my son's problems. We decided not to give our son any more living expenses. Since he has taken the second exam, he should learn to support himself by himself, and he can't expect his parents to support him for a long time.
In the first month, my son would call ** to ask about living expenses. Later, when we resolutely refused to give it, we didn't mention it.
After that, we saved all the money we had for our son's living expenses. By the end of the year, we had saved more than 500,000 yuan. I discussed with my husband that it would be better to use the money to buy a house and leave it to my daughter. In the future, when my daughter goes to college or works, she will have her own nest.
Through this incident, I learned a lesson. Parents should not spoil their children, but teach them to be self-reliant. Now that we are saving money to buy a house for our daughter, we must also interfere less and let our daughter learn to plan her own life.