Mo Yan said: A woman, even if she has no heart, these three things have to be hidden from the person next to herLet's talk about what three things are, and grasping these three degrees may give you some inspiration.
Wife's property
In Mo Yan's view, for the wife, the property of the maiden family is a matter that needs to be handled carefully. Perhaps, however, we can look at the issue from another angle. For a wife, not knowing her property situation can be a retreat rather than a lack of trust.
Before Xiaowen and her husband got married, she chose to tell her husband about her family background, thinking that this was a kind of honesty and guarantee. However, after marriage, it was found that this transparent financial communication seemed to make the couple a little slack off to a certain extent. Because of the "family guarantee", the husband and wife seem to have lost some motivation for work, and their work has become a little lazy.
Seeing this change, Xiaowen began to realize that perhaps her original intention was to make her husband feel at ease, but this peace of mind affected the enthusiasm of both husband and wife to a certain extent. So, she decided to adopt an ingenious strategy. She told her husband that she had participated in the ** investment and had suffered a certain loss as a result. Although the husband did not appear to be very happy, this only aroused his desire to work harder.
There is a deep meaning behind Xiaowen's decision. She realized that the trust and motivation between husband and wife does not only come from material "guarantees", but more importantly, they move forward hand in hand on common ideals and goals. By showing that her investment failed, she injected a new impetus into the relationship and allowed both parties to rediscover their passion for their work.
The wife may choose to keep this information so that she has more options in the event of a change in her life. This attitude reflects a woman's sense of responsibility for the stability of the family, and it also motivates the husband to work harder to build a happier family together.
ParentsofPreconceptions
Mo Yan emphasized that women should be cautious in dealing with their parents' prejudices in marriage, so as not to cause family conflicts. This view is not a question of marital trust, but more of a pursuit of family harmony.
I don't tell my husband about my parents' prejudices, one is that my life is my own, and the other is that my parents don't live with my husband and don't understand some of his behaviors.
Going home for the Chinese New Year is something I am particularly looking forward to. However, one year, my husband was unable to accompany me home due to his busy work, which led to some misunderstandings.
At that time, my parents were at the table at the Chinese New Year's Eve dinner and asked why my husband did not accompany me home. They see it as a bad sign and seem to question his sense of responsibility to his family. I tried to explain, but the understanding didn't seem to convey the past.
After a few days, I found out that my husband was indeed delayed because of work affairs, and he was anxious, but he couldn't tell me in time because of the bad signal. He felt guilty for not being able to accompany me home, and I felt some invisible pressure from my parents' misunderstanding.
So, I decided to take the initiative to talk to my parents about it when I returned to my parents' home. I explained in detail what my husband was working like at the time and how he felt guilty about not being with me. After hearing this, my parents gradually understood the truth of the facts, and at the same time, I also felt my support for my husband.
There may be differences in culture and values between different family backgrounds, and in order to avoid unnecessary friction caused by such differences, women may choose to hide from the person next to them in order to maintain the harmony of the marriage. This approach reflects thoughtful consideration of the marital relationship and is a manifestation of wisdom.
GirlfriendsofPrivate matters
Between friendship and marriage, women may face a choice, and in Mo Yan's profound view, the question of a woman's need to hide from the person next to her about her best friend's private affairs is essentially a delicate balance between friendship and marriage.
In the complex interweaving of interpersonal relationships, private messages between friends are often a person's precious spiritual sustenance. However, this does not mean that all secrets should be shared without reservation. A woman chooses to keep her best friend's private affairs, not because she is not honest with her husband, but out of cherishing and respecting friendship. This respect is not a weakening of the marital relationship, but a manifestation of the common prosperity of both relationships.
The balance between friendship and marriage often requires a woman to be wise and sensitive when processing information. Sometimes, a friend's private affairs may involve special circumstances or matters that do not have a real impact on the marriage. In this case, the woman chooses to hide from the person next to her in order to avoid unnecessary contradictions and misunderstandings. This is not a distrust of marriage, but a respect for the unique boundaries between the two relationships.
In complex social relationships, the thoughtful and wise choices that women show are not a retreat from marriage, but a care for family and friendship. They choose to keep the information, not to pander, but to a mature way of dealing with it, a resilient and warm presence in marriage.
What do you think, welcome to leave a message in the comment area!
Mo Yan