What do you do as a parent when your child is not confident or afraid to do something?Most people may say, "You can" and "Believe in yourself, you can do it", but sometimes this kind of "empty" affirmation and encouragement will pale in comparison, and too much will increase the child's pressure and even induce resistance.
Because of different innate personality temperaments or acquired growth environments, some children will have low self-esteem, timidity, withdrawal, and lack of self-confidence when facing challenges, and this is the time to test their parents' patience. When your child is not confident, try the following.
1.Don't force it, empathize first. Don't rush to encourage your child, "You can" and "You can do it". These words seem to be affirmative, but in fact they negate the child's own feelings. So you might as well empathize with him first, such as telling him that "it's really hard to learn to ride for the first time" and "it takes a lot of courage to play the horizontal bar, and it's normal to be afraid". This kind of empathy will give the child a sense of security, he will feel that his parents understand and accept him, and believe that his parents are willing to help him.
2.Ask your child to express concerns and concerns. You can also let your child talk about his psychological worries and worries, and then help him find ways to overcome them. If the child is not good at expressing himself or is unwilling to express himself, parents can also take the initiative to communicate, "Are you worried that others will laugh at you if you don't do well?".So if your friend didn't do a good job, would you laugh at him?”
3.Externalize the difficulty. Avoid letting your child attribute "not doing well" or "not daring to do" to his or her own ability. You can say to him, "It's hard to learn to skate, but it's not because you're stupid, and Dad couldn't do it when he first learned", or "Learning takes a process, and if you can't do it now, it doesn't mean you won't be able to do it later." Let your child feel that his lack of confidence or worry is normal but can be overcome.
4.Try to make it less difficult. If something is really difficult for the child, parents can reduce the difficulty appropriately and try to let the child take the first step to success to increase self-confidence. For example, to teach children to play table tennis, parents can first teach children to hold the ball with a paddle for a while, and as long as the child has done it, they can say, "Look, you did a good job!"."Dividing the learning process into small steps allows children to continue to move from success to success.
5.Reminder of past successes. Parents can also hint that their children can do it through past experiences, such as "You see you didn't know how to ride a scooter before, but now you ride so well", "You jumped so slowly when you first learned to jump rope, and now you can jump so well", suggesting that past successful experiences can also increase children's self-confidence. ▲
Using the panoramic planning system of Wish Education, combined with parents' classroom planning for step-by-step, step-by-step learning from shallow to deep, children can explore their potential, and parents can educate flexibly. Confidence and a sense of accomplishment can gradually improve every day!Are you thinking about how to discipline a child who is rebellious, disgusted with school, and addicted to mobile phones?You might as well give yourself a big gift: the heart wishes for a panoramic planning system for family education. Heart Wish Education focuses on various growth problems of teenagers, family education guidance and psychological counseling, to be a wise parent, and to achieve a happy family!
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