In the workplace, we often encounter all kinds of dinners, some of which are organized by the company, some are spontaneously organized by colleagues, and some are invited by leaders or customers. Some of these dinners are for the exchange of work, some are for building relationships, and some are for celebrating an important event. How should we choose these meals?Some people may feel that as long as there is a dinner, they should attend it, so that they can meet more people and accumulate more contacts. However, not all meals are suitable for us to participate in, and if we participate in inappropriate meals, it may cause us some trouble and trouble. So, what kind of dinner is not suitable for us to attend?Today, we're going to talk about this topic. 
First of all, indirectly invited dinners are not attended. What is an indirect invitation?It is not an invitation to you directly, but an invitation that is conveyed or implied through a third party. For example, someone says to you, "I heard there's a dinner tonight, would you like to go with you?"Or, "I saw that xx posted a circle of friends saying that he was going to dinner tonight, and you seem to be in his friends list, do you want to go?".Such an invitation is an indirect invitation. Why don't you participate in the dinner that is indirectly invited?There are several reasons for this: such a meal may not have a clear purpose and theme, and it is just a group of people getting together for a meal. If you go, you may feel bored and embarrassed, and you may not have a common language or topic with other people.
Such a meal may not take into account your time and preferences, and if you go, it may affect your work and life arrangements, and you may also eat food that you don't like.
Such a meal may not give you enough respect and attention, and if you go, it may make you feel like you are redundant or being taken advantage of.
So, if you receive an indirect invitation to a dinner, it's best not to say yes unless you have a clear understanding of the situation and feel the need to attend. Otherwise, you can politely decline, such as: "Thank you for the invitation, but I already have other arrangements." Or, "Thank you for the reminder, but I'm not going to be able to go." "In this way, you can maintain your independence and dignity and avoid causing unnecessary problems to others. Of course, not all indirectly invited dinners are not attended, and in some cases, you may feel that this dinner has some benefits or meanings for you, for example, it can increase your knowledge or expand your network. However, in this case, you should also pay attention to the following: understand the purpose and theme of the meal beforehand, as well as the people attending and their background and interests. This will allow you to have a mental preparation and also allow you to find some common ground and topics.
Don't be overly proactive or reactive, but maintain proper communication and interaction. Being too proactive may make people think you have other purposes, and being too passive may make people think that you are cold or bored.
Don't be too utilitarian or rushed, build real trust and friendship. Being too utilitarian may make people think you're insincere or unreliable, and being in a hurry can make people think you're disrespectful or ununderstanding.
In short, you should have a choice and judgment to participate in the dinner, and you should decide according to your own situation and needs. If you don't feel that a dinner party is helpful or meaningful to you, then don't force yourself to participate, but spend your time and energy on something more valuable. Of course, if you feel that a dinner party has some benefits or meaning for you, then you should seize the opportunity to show your style and charm and establish good interpersonal relationships. In this way, the dinner can become a help for your career development, rather than a hindrance. I hope you found this article helpful, and if you have any other questions about the workplace, please feel free to ask me.