It's been a while lately, and I've been in a bad mood and a little down. It's not really enough to say that I'm depressed, but I'm not interested in anything, I want to be a deserter or an ostrich, and I bury my head in the sand, "Lulu?."Well, don't ask me, I don't know, I'm not here. ”
Every morning when I send my baby to school, I just want to find a sofa or bed, roll a duvet and swipe my phone.
Circle of friends, ** number, sometimes Xiaohongshu ......I brush my phone a lot, it's not fun, my brain will be groggy, and the content will be the same, it's boring, but I've been brushing. The reason is, it's better than being in a daze, and it looks like I'm busy doing something.
Generally speaking, a good person is in a low mood and always encounters something difficult to get over. But I really didn't, I was tired, I felt tired, tired, and I wanted to escape.
*。Honestly, looking around my life, I really don't have anything to complain about.
I have a job that I created and enjoyed, a stable and stable family, a stubborn but loving husband, and two daughters ...... who look well-behaved and cuteWhen I opened my mouth to say that it was bleak, I felt that I was hypocritical.
But the emotions are real, when the emotions come, it is like a sudden heavy rain in the scorching sun, no one can hide from it, but it can only be drenched into a soup chicken.
One day I was talking to a friend in China, and she said, "I really feel that I can't lift my spirits, so I will go to the countryside to land and plant melons and beans. ”
After that, the two of us were at opposite ends of the world, holding our mobile phones, and at the same time burst into laughter like killing pigs.
*。She laughed because she knew how sincere she was.
She had just withdrawn from a community of body, mind, and spirit. Tens of thousands of spiritual classes, Shanghai drove hundreds of kilometers, to a mountain so barren that you can meet fox fairies, every day at six o'clock to do more research Xi.
Seeing that others have become full of vitality, but the more she cultivates, the more chaotic she becomes, and she can't clear her depression at all.
In fact, whether it is body, mind and spirit, or various religions, it is the best way to take advantage of the weakness in a certain period of slackness in life. Whether or not you can be baptized depends largely on your own education, knowledge, experience, and critical thinking ability, as well as the setbacks and opportunities you encounter at that time.
After five days of class, hundreds of kilometers back to Shanghai, I was sleepy on the road, and the coffee in the highway service area was more difficult to drink.
She looked at the group while drinking, the other students were hundreds of words, and she was full of enthusiasm after the meeting, she really couldn't empathize, and asked herself: "Who am I and why am I here?".”
Then he quit the group and drove home listlessly.
*。I laugh because everyone is superstitious about what they don't understand. If I hadn't come to France, I would have really believed the relief and relief of returning to the countryside and going home to farm, but now, I know too well that Li Ziqi's days are only suitable for **.
After three years of grinding, this spring, Mr. Lu finally finished the vegetable garden, which is about 50 square meters.
When I first planned it, I thought it was fifty square metersAt most, it's a one-bedroom apartment, so small, what can you do?
But after it was built, I realized that if it was just a vacant land, fifty square meters was really not small. Take good care of it, make it into a garden like Li Ziqi, the corners are full of melons and fruits, and the yield can allow me to carry the burden to the morning market.
However, the ground was still planted by me, and I didn't talk about the weeds, because there was no support, and the cucumbers and beans were lying crooked on the ground, so I was still tirelessly growing countless cucumbers and some beans, which was quite gratifying.
Then I also grew some pumpkins, and there were actually two green, fluffy winter melons in the middle, but I had never sprinkled winter melon seeds at all, and it was not impossible to wait for the rabbits.
*。However, in fact, if you want to plant the land well, it takes no less time and energy than going to work
In fact, not only me, but also my parents were born in the city, and even my grandparents have never farmed the land.
I had a headache when I looked at the weeds that were growing up, let alone asked me to fertilize. As the third generation of the city, my vegetable garden and I are only in the stage of trying to understand each other, and there is no deep connection.
I can't believe in body, mind, soul or others, I can't grow melons and fruits, I don't drink alcohol, I don't smoke, I can't eat too much red meat and desserts, and I don't like nightclubs and ......But a middle-aged woman who is tired and declining, when she is depressed, everyone needs an outlet to release herself!
*。When I woke up in the morning, I didn't want to go to work as usual. Originally, I used my mobile phone to swipe **, but the number was upgraded, and when I brushed **, I would also display the message I received, which was too inhumane, and it didn't make people happily swipe their phones
So, I decided to use my computer to scroll through the web, and suddenly it occurred to me that I had a 15% discount coupon at Printemps, and I had to check when it expired
When I opened the spring page, I suddenly found that it was today, and the last day was actually today
I bounced off the stool at once, circled around the room a few times, changed into clothes and ran out, I hadn't run so fast in a long time, and I was out of breath.
At 11 o'clock in the morning, there was no one in the whole car, and after leaving the tunnel, it was cloudy for two months in Paris, and there was sunshine, and suddenly I smiled, which was really pleasant.
*。I went to the Spring Department Store and bought a bag that I had been dreaming about for a long time. I know this bag breaks when it leaves the counter, but I like it.
I also bought the crystal ice bucket that Mr. Lu wanted, which can be set up with the whiskey glasses at home, and next time I invite my buddies to come, it is estimated that the cowhide can blow into the sky.
I also bought crystal lamps and candlesticks, originally I wanted to buy a large candlestick, but it was out of stock, so I had to wait.
Happy times are always too short. It was four o'clock in a blink of an eye, and I hurried to the school to pick up the baby and cook, sweeping away the haze, happy and thanking God.
Why are people happy?
That's because the brain secretes a hormone called dopamine. When people reach middle age, their metabolism slows down, and hormones will be secreted less and less, right?So the little kid, you can be happy all day, and now, if you want to be happy, it's hard.
*。Before, I have found out that I have a very industrial tongue, and I like to eat the food made in the restaurant, the thick oil red sauce, and those healthy light foods with green and zero fat, which are disgusted with each other;This time I kind of understood, I still have a particularly industrialized soul that promotes the secretion of dopamineThose methods of self-cultivation and cultivation of sentiment might as well rush directly to the department store to spend money when they come to me!
In the era of green and zero-carbon health, this happiness seems to have turned into a provocation, and in French, it is not a healthy way of living.
People are not saints and sages, they are all mortals, if I change my life in the next life, I may plant melons and flowers, devote myself to religion, jump and drink or meditate on Zhong Nanshan, but in this life born in the gap between the reinforced concrete cities, I have not learned these ways to create happiness!
From childhood to adulthood, the joy of the moment when my finger swiped over the newly purchased object made me real and familiar. It makes me feel that all the hard work is worth it, and at this moment, I tremble with joy.
The Buddha said: Whatever you want, whatever you want, whatever you want.
When I reach middle age, I have already mastered the ** is the limit, I will not become a **shopaholic, so life is short, I just want to make myself happy!