Written on the front:
I don't know if you have ever had such an experience?
We may have a natural sense of trust in some of our children's strengths, optimistic that they can consistently maintain their strengths, and that occasional carelessness can be ignored.
For some of our children's weak subjects, we may be Xi to weak thinking, and correspondingly, children are also Xi to self-suggesting "no".
Is it true that the gap between the advantages and disadvantages of disciplines cannot be bridged?
Maybe the reality is far less clear than we think.
Strengths need to be wary of ability traps
My child started mathematics relatively early, and he also had a strong interest in mathematics in his early years.
I still remember when I first entered elementary school, there was an open class in the class, and the principal praised Xi the children for doing the questions quickly and well. Since then, we have nicknamed him "the little prince of mathematics" at home, and he has become more motivated to learn Xi mathematics.
In the upper grades of elementary school, he was named the representative of the mathematics class in his class. When I went to junior high school, I was naturally assigned to the key mathematics class.
When I thought that my child would be able to go to the next level in the subject of strength, I gradually realized that something was wrong.
Hey, why are there so many mistakes in math calculations and concept problems?"I pointed out the wrong question and fought back my anger.
It's too fast, it's just careless. Don't worry, I know it all. The child replied without being salty.
Hey, why don't you do your math homework?"On another occasion, I observed a child with glazed eyes.
It's so hard, I don't have any idea at all, what should I do?!”
The child huddled in a corner, a little self-defeating, and the mathematically high-spirited young man from before.
It turns out that the so-called dominant disciplines are also so vulnerable, I thought to myself.
A while ago, there was a parent-teacher conference, and the math teacher popularized the Xi learning methods.
For example, the mistakes of some calculation problems and application problems may actually expose some shortcomings in children's thinking in understanding the meaning of the problem, choosing the path to solve the problem, and using reasonable problem-solving skills, not just carelessness.
For some difficult problems, if the child does not have ideas, it may be because his basic knowledge is not firmly grasped, or his thinking is not open enough.
After listening to the teacher's words, I immediately began to practice - changing the frequency of letting the child explain the wrong questions to every day, and asking him to take them seriously, no matter whether it is difficult or simple.
At first, he seemed impatient, especially when it came to miscalculations, and always rushed to skim them with disdain.
At this point, I tried to show full patience and try to understand as much as possible the real reason behind his miscalculations by asking questions step by step. The same is true for puzzles that involve multiple solutions to one problem.
Under my unrelentingness, I finally have a little bit in my heart about his recent instability.
In fact, the human brain is inert, especially when it thinks that it has a disciplinary advantage, it may be easy to subconsciously breed complacency, and then Xi path dependence, trying to use "one trick" to stand alone.
Nowhere is this more evident than in my children.
For some simple questions, he fell into the trap of complacency, thinking that he had mastered it completely, and from time to time he was lazy, omitting intermediate steps and giving direct answers. What's more, in order to play after completing homework quickly, the examination questions are sloppy, the handwriting is sloppy, and sometimes Xi is used to dead calculations, and they are too lazy to check. As a direct consequence, there are many errors in calculations. Over time, computing power has dropped dramatically, and self-confidence has suffered greatly.
For some difficult problems, he fell into the trap of adaptation, relying too much on previous solutions to problems. Once you haven't done a similar question, or the question requires more than one solution to the question, it is easy to be afraid of difficulties, and sometimes even drill the tip of the horns, which will lead to a direct lying down.
But is it true that there is no idea at all about the problem?
Not entirely.
I carefully analyzed some of the so-called problems that caused him to be confused, and except for a few cases that required more novel solutions to the problems, the reason why the rest of the questions were missed and misunderstood was due to a partial understanding of the basic concepts involved in the questions. For example, if you don't understand the concepts of line segments and angles thoroughly, it is easy to make mistakes in solving problems.
After identifying these pitfalls of his abilities, I discussed with him the following countermeasures:
First of all,It is necessary to slow down the speed of doing the questions, do more pen calculations instead of mental arithmetic, strengthen the calculation while completing the steps, and speed up while ensuring the accuracy rate.
Secondly,For some problems that are prone to miscalculation, learn to review your thinking process through the error book, and strive to identify the blind spots of thinking and prescribe the right medicine.
Finally,For some difficult problems, you must first learn to carefully review the questions, read them several times if you don't understand them once, and try to figure out the knowledge points that may be involved. On the basis of consolidating knowledge, we will do the questions to ensure the effectiveness of the thinking path.
After implementing the above three guidelines, I observed for a while, and his handwriting gradually became correct, and the number of calculation errors began to decrease, and the situation finally began to develop in a benign direction, and I finally breathed a sigh of relief.
Of course, the math teacher also said that I should strengthen thinking training in normal times, but it is difficult to ensure a qualitative leap in a short period of time. Therefore, in the near future, I am still ready to grasp the big and let go of the small, first make sure to do the above three points, so that the child's self-confidence can be strengthened to the greatest extent, and then there will be motivation to challenge difficult topics.
Xi on weaknesses to rebuild self-confidence
Why didn't your child participate in the school's English dubbing competition?The teacher asked with concern in WeChat.
AhhI don't know. "I was thinking about the child's level, and I thought that maybe it would be wise not to participate.
I see that you send me dubbing audio every day, and I thought that the child would definitely sign up. The teacher was still puzzled.
Well, it is estimated that the child feels that he is not capable enough to be confident. "I finally spoke my mind.
This has to be practiced, and there is a speech contest later, so you should practice hard and don't give up the opportunity. "The teacher kept up the good work.
Uh-huh, okay. I quickly wiped the beads of sweat from my forehead and let out a long breath.
When I got home, I pretended to be casual and mentioned it casually, as if so-and-so in your class had signed up for an English dubbing competition. The child easily answered, yes, they have a strong English. When I saw them sign up, I knew that I must be out of the show, so I didn't report it.
I didn't expect him to confess so quickly, and I was really sad and happy.
The good thing is that at his age, being able to have such self-knowledge can indeed save a lot of unnecessary effort. The so-called no competition, there is no failure, and there will be no discouragement to doubt life.
Sadly, the fact that I was so quick to define myself as a person who was not good at English may have been genuinely influenced by me. But is that really good?If you have to face fierce competition and sudden defeat in the future, will you still have the courage to stand up again?
After settling down, I carefully analyzed our psychological state of weak subjects, and probably still adhered to the inherent thinking, rigidly believing that the gap between myself and others has always existed, and there is no possibility of narrowing, so I self-suggest that it is useless to work hard.
But is it really useless to try?
Not really. The concept of mental representation has been mentioned in Deliberate Practice "Mental Xi", namely:Through "continuous learning Xi or "continuous action" to gain a deep familiarity with the whole picture of something。When a person has established a strong mental representation of a certain field, it is very easy to understand the relevant information of the field, and then promote its development into his own area of strength.
I carefully reviewed the process of building a child's mathematical strengths, and it is likely that they have become proficient Xi, that is, gradually building self-confidence through effective mental representations, and then gradually expanding their strengths through continuous positive feedback or motivation.
So, for English, the current weak subject, perhaps what I can do is to help children rebuild their confidence through effective deliberate Xi, and at the same time strengthen the effect of positive feedback through some ability-matched external tests.
With the positive attitude of hard work and gain, my children and I systematically sorted out the weak links in English, and then prepared to carry out deliberate practice Xi item by item.
On the surface, the children's points are mostly in reading comprehension, and the English teacher also emphasized its importance, and also indicated that the attitude will be more difficult in the future. But after he did a few sets of mold rolls, my thinking changed a bit.
Rather than taking the risk of further dampening your child's motivation to learn Xi, brush up on difficult reading questions on the premise that the foundation is not solid;It is better to settle for the next best thing, and strive to consolidate the vocabulary and grammar knowledge of English textbooks and school-based assignments in combination with the vocabulary of the syllabus.
While ensuring the accuracy of basic question types, the difficulty of reading comprehension can also be reduced in disguise through the continuous accumulation of vocabulary, so as to achieve the purpose of improving the accuracy of reading comprehension questions.
Now that you've made up your mind, the next step is to put it into practice.
On weekend Xi, I mainly refer to the vocabulary list in the textbook to help him learn from the past. In addition to ensuring that his words are pronounced and spelled correctly, he will also use the vocabulary of the syllabus for appropriate extended memorization. At the same time, I also deepened his understanding and mastery of words and fixed collocations through a variety of training methods such as translating Chinese to English and forming sentences.
Although I didn't participate in this dubbing competition, I still insisted on letting him dub a paragraph every day, and he didn't resist, but completed it seriously. Although his progress was slow, at least some new words were recognized, some pronunciations were slowly corrected, and his self-confidence was increased to a certain extent.
Of course, I did not give up completely on reading comprehension, but chose passages that were close to his vocabulary level for deliberate Xi. On the one hand, it is used to test the effectiveness of his previous stage of Xi, and on the other hand, because of the moderate difficulty, it can also be used to continuously enhance his self-confidence.
Gradually, he made fewer spelling errors in his daily Xi, and some of the more difficult reading questions could be corrected by logic or language, which was a good change.
Figure 2: ** On the network.
Change the mindset and cultivate the quality of will
Having said so much, what I want to express is nothing more than that the strengths and weaknesses of children's subjects are not as indestructible as we think, and they can be transformed into each other to a certain extent, and the key lies in the effective transformation of our thinking mode.
According to Lifelong Growth, "Our success is not determined by our ability and talent, but by the mindset we display in the pursuit of our goals." ”
Therefore, when we learn to look at the strengths and weaknesses of children's subjects with a growth mindset, that is, a developmental perspective, it is possible to fundamentally change attitudes and behaviors, and it is possible to teach children according to their aptitude, and to stimulate, cultivate or maintain children's continuous love for certain subjects through appropriate methods, constantly enhance their strengths, and gradually transform their disadvantages into advantages.
In addition to the change of thinking, there is another point that is indispensable, that is, the cultivation of children's willpower. Because,Perseverance is always necessary.
The book "Perseverance" also gives us some specific reference opinions on the cultivation of willpower.
First, we must learn to protect hard-won interests in both strong and disadvantaged subjects, because interest is the best teacher and can stimulate the enthusiasm of Xi to the greatest extent
For example, if your child is interested in history, you can take him to museums more often, which broadens his horizons and accumulates materials for writing.
Second, set realistic goals to strive for and constantly adjust them dynamically to your child's situation, as small and brisk steps can sometimes be more effective than long runs.
For example, in order to improve the effectiveness of children's language and literature Xi, I will carefully analyze the types of easy-to-mistake questions with him, and strive to make a single-point breakthrough in those easy-to-score topics in the near future, rather than immediately asking for an unrealistic comprehensive breakthrough.
Third, adhere to effective deliberate Xi to form a strong psychological representation, and then develop good XiXi learning habits to ensure that you will not fall down when you encounter setbacks.
In fact, each discipline needs to be deliberately practiced Xi in a targeted manner, some of which may be leaked, and some may be improved. Set up an effective deliberate Xi that matches the child's ability, in this process, not only can let the child gradually experience that he is slowly becoming stronger and gain real self-confidence, but also let him subjectively abandon the idea of getting something for nothing, which is beneficial to his future development.
Finally, I hope that we can all break the stereotype of children's academic strengths and weaknesses, look at children's subject development from a developmental perspective, and temper their will and quality by stimulating interest, setting goals, and deliberately practicing Xi, so as to make them a better version of themselves.
Figure 3: ** On the network.
Author |Shanghai Lele Mom.
The students of the third batch of the writing camp of Tongxing Academy joined hands with Tongxing to accompany and grow together with children.
Interactive topics
What do you think about children learning Xi partial subjects?Is there any good trick or method?Feel free to leave us a message to share your thoughts!
Further reading
Children learn math, brush up on problems, rush ahead, and use programming to assist ......The posture is not right, and the effort is in vain.
From "Thirty Thousand Miles of Chang'an", see how to learn Xi language.
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