In real life, many parents often do not know when they cause emotional neglect and abuse to their children.
They think they love their children very much and give them everything they want, but they never enter the inner world of their children.
The United Nations Children's ** study found that:In China, 671% of parents have emotionally abused their children.
The most common way is:Verbally humiliating your child or criticizing your child without a bottom line.
01 Emotional abuse - leaving no trace but unforgettable
Emotional abuse is when a parent or caregiver uses abusive language, threats, humiliation, indifference, etc., to hurt a child's mind.
This kind of psychological sadism is often wrapped in the cloak of love.
It often comes from the people closest to you, who want to instill in each other what they think is the most suitable and correct thing for the other person.
Because it's the most intimate, you think "I'm all for your good" and your child thinks "I can't resist".
In fact, many parents don't think that they have "emotionally abused" their children, but in real life, we may all be doing these things:
Belittle children - you're always like this, it's useless!
Threaten the child - if you don't obey again, I will ......
Blame the child - it's all because of you that I'm so tired and so hard!
Humiliate children - look at other people's children, and then look at yourself!
Ignore your child's needs or respond with silence – go away and don't bother me!
Children who grow up in this environment can feel helpless, anxious, have low self-esteem, and even develop depression and suicidal tendencies.
02 Emotional abuse - "inheritance" under intergenerational transmission
I understand the truth, but I always can't do it, and it's very painful. I don't want my children to go through it, but I have become a parent like my parents."
On the Internet, a mother was refuted by her child in the process of disciplining her child, because the child said the same thing she said when she was a child and responded to her parents, she woke up, and she unconsciously became the most annoying person she once was.
Emotional abuse not only has a direct impact on the physical and mental health of the abused individual, but also affects the individual's parenting style as an adult, and even has a negative intergenerational impact on the individual's children.
This is the intergenerational effect!
* Waiting children tend to repeat the harm they have experienced in adulthood, passing it on to the next generation.
This vicious cycle needs to be broken to ensure that every child is able to grow up in a loving and respectful environment.
03 Open the shackles so that love is no longer heavy
In our family, there are very few parents who do not love their children, but there are countless parents who love their children so much that they always accidentally hurt their children.
How to love children correctly is a topic that every parent needs to think about.
1. Raise awareness:Educate parents and the community at large about the dangers of emotional abuse and help them recognise the importance of words and behaviour to their children's mental health.
2. Provide support:Provide appropriate support and resources, including counselling and child protective services, to children and families who may be at risk of emotional abuse.
3. Cultivate positive parenting skills for parents:Educate parents on positive parenting skills such as effective communication, emotional expression, and building loving and respectful relationships.
4. Establish a support networkCreate a support network for those experienced parents to share their stories and experiences to provide support and guidance to other families.
5. Educate children on emotional managementEducate children on emotional management skills to help them express and process their emotions effectively, enhancing their self-esteem and mental resilience.
6. Seek help from professional psychological counselingParents can communicate their concerns and confusion with the counselor and listen to the counselor's opinion.