Whether a person is happy or unhappy has little to do with marriage in essence, and some people may not be happy even if they don't get married.
There are also some unmarried people around me, and some people clean up themselves no matter how they go to the end, and they are almost 40 years old, and there is still no shortage of 20-year-old girls around. Some people don't clean up at home and outside every day, and they look sloppy when they go in and out, and they don't have the next meal after eating.
The first person goes home every day with a sad face, and the second person is happy every day and doesn't know sorrow.
In fact, marriage has not always existed, just like the word "country", it was born with the development of society and the needs of society.
One of the essential reasons for the birth of marriage is that two or several independent individuals form a community in order to survive together and face the difficulties in life together.
They may be composed of love, they may be composed of interests, or they may be composed of needs and desires at a certain moment. However, everything is constantly changing, and marriage is no exception.
Marriage has also undergone a lot of changes from ancient times to the present, and with the changes in society, there have been polyandries, polygamy, and now monogamy.
This is like two business partners, there will always be such and such contradictions and problems in the process of cooperation, and there are not a few who even turn the table and do nothing, and it is not for nothing that the court can see in detail.
Some people say that happiness is just a feeling of human beings, so why do they feel that their marriage is unhappy, and why do they have the so-called "three-year pain" and "seven-year itch" after marriage.
This is like what the Buddha said about suffering: love and separation, resentment, incomprehension, greed, hatred, and loss of glory and happiness.
Therefore, there are many reasons why you feel unhappy in your marriage, but you can't do without these sufferings:
1. There is no harm if there is no comparison, because when you meet a better person, you feel that the other half is getting worse and worse.
This is a kind of "can't beg", in the process of life, I naturally come into contact with many people, and there are more people who are better than my other half, so I will be disappointed in the other half, and I can't do anything.
So he complained that his life was not good, he was unladylike, and his marriage was unhappy. There is no way to compare people, and your dissatisfaction is because of the comparison.
2. Want to change the other party, hoping that the other half will change according to your expectations.
I hope to change the other half through myself, but the other half does not develop in the direction I want, so I complain. did not achieve his expected goal, and developed hatred, feeling that the other half was not worthy of himself if he did not seek progress. Trying to change people is a neurosis.
3. Insatiable, dissatisfied, eating from the bowl and looking at the pot.
Men like beautiful, well-built, 18-year-olds, who can't walk when they see a beautiful one, and can't look down on the yellow-faced woman at home. Women like handsome, golden, sweet-talking, long-lasting bodies, and feel that their husband's genes are not good.
There's a poem here"Greed and hatred".
One of the poems in Hu Yanyan's "Solving the People's Will" in the Qing Dynasty:
Lack of contentment is difficult to fill.
Busy all day long just for hunger, only to be full and think about clothes.
There are abundant food and clothing, and there are few beautiful wives in the room.
Marry a beautiful wife and a beautiful concubine, and go in and out without a sedan chair and a few horses.
A herd of mules and horses has been prepared, and the fields are not widely used.
Tens of millions of acres of fertile land were placed, and they were deceived without official positions.
Seven and five grades are still too little, and three and four are still too low.
Yipin was the prime minister of the dynasty, and he was envious of the king as the emperor.
Satisfied with being the Son of Heaven, I hope that there will be no death for eternity.
There is always no end to delusions, and a coffin is long covered with hatred.