On the issue of education, people often ask, should it be a chicken baby or a free-range?However, one teacher pointed out that there is no inevitable choice between the two, and it is difficult to educate children well if they go to either extreme. The best way to educate should be both tension and relaxation, both involution and effort, as well as relaxed and free growth.
Education is like flying a kite, and it is necessary to grasp the degree between tight and loose. If you pull it too tightly, the kite will be controlled and lose its freedom;If you relax too loosely, the kite will lose its sense of direction again. Parents' grasp of the line of educating their children is the integration between involution and relaxation. Ye Shengtao is a well-known educator, and his philosophy of educating children is to cultivate habits as the core. His son Ye Zhishan had poor academic performance when he was a child, and even passed a grade. Faced with such a situation, Ye Shengtao did not blame the child, but started from the habit, asked the child to read every day, write something about what he was interested in, and tell him what he had learned, and discuss how to improve together. Under Ye Shengtao's long-term guidance, his children have developed good writing skills, and their academic performance has also improved significantly.
Some people say that parents with full scores look at the results, and failing parents look at the process. If parents only focus on their children's grades, they will only treat the symptoms but not the root cause, and will not be able to cultivate good study habits for their children. He Lingfeng's daughter once scored 59 points in the math test, and many of her classmates scored full marks. He didn't get angry, but told his daughter that the significance of this exam is that you diagnosed a problem with a score of 41, found the problem and corrected it, and you are the biggest beneficiary of this exam.
Children develop good habits in order to achieve excellent results, rather than simply pursuing the surprise of grades. It is because habit determines performance, and it is also because of habit work hard that you can achieve excellent results with half the effort. As long as the child develops good habits, becoming excellent is a matter of course.
In the process of educating children, it is very important for parents to adjust their children's mentality and make appropriate relaxation of emotions. Taleb has analysed three states, fragile, resilient, and antifragile. Many parents want their children to be strong phoenixes, but in reality, they develop fragile and fragile crystal phoenixes. They are always as careful as treading thin ice on small things in case the child gets hurt. And true resilience should be the ability to persevere and rise in the face of adversity, rather than being afraid of adversity and difficulties.
Therefore, parents should cultivate their children's psychological qualities, so that they can face setbacks and difficulties calmly, learn and grow from them. At the same time, it is also important to let children feel positive emotions in their daily lives, so that they can be confident and optimistic.
To sum up, the most suitable way of education should be half involution and half relaxation. It is necessary to focus on cultivating children's learning habits and focus on the process rather than the result. At the same time, relax in the mentality and involute in the emotion, and cultivate a strong psychological quality. In this way, children can be educated well.