"Zhuangzi Foreign Things": "The Quanzi is so in the fish, get the fish and forget the Quan;."The hoof is so in the rabbit, get the rabbit and forget the hoof;The speaker cares so much, and he forgets to speak. ”
Get the basket where the fish forgets to hold the fish, get the tool that the rabbit forgets to catch the rabbit, get the language that forgets to express the meaning. ）
People tend to be like this, focusing only on what they want, and once they get it, they forget about the giver (the person who has helped them).
In turn, the giver complains that the giver is not grateful.
In the end, the heart is far away.
In fact, a wise person, whether he is the giver or the giver, will never let the "pull" remain in his heart.
Xie Xun in "Heaven and Dragon Slayer" was killed by his master Cheng Kun because of his family, which filled his heart with hatred.
After he killed some innocent people on the rivers and lakes, he left "evidence" that "the murderer Cheng Kun" was forced to show up.
But Xie Xun is good-natured, and the guilt of killing people torments his conscience, so much so that he turns himself into a madman.
The object of hatred is others, but it is the avenger himself who is hurt by the psychology of hatred.
It's like,If a person hurts you, but you remember the hurt for the rest of your life, it is equivalent to that person has been hurting you.
When Mo Yan was a child, his mother followed others to pick up ears of wheat in order to make a living, and after being discovered, his mother was left behind by the "big team" of picking ears of wheat together because her small feet were not fast.
He watched his mother be counted, lectured, and confiscated from the few ears of wheat that were not easy to find.
Decades later, when Mo Yan and his mother went to the market together, Mo Yan recognized the person who bullied his mother at a glance and wanted to go up to avenge the revenge of the year.
His mother stopped him: "He's not the one who hurt me. ”
Forget the hurt so that there is no harm;Forget hatred so that there can be no hatred.
Saw such a question on a forum:
"Do you have relatives and friends around you who are like this, and every day they are calculating how much money others have earned, how much money they have saved, and how much money they can lend to them if they have something.
The first thing he does, big or small, is to figure out which relatives can lend him how much, and which friends can support him.
He never thought about how he could solve the dilemma in front of him, as if the whole world was his fault.
If you do not lend to him, you become his enemy.
Moreover, he will brag to you every day about how rich their family is, even if he borrows your money, and never mentions paying it back. ”
There are many replies to this question, so it is not uncommon for everyone to see such people.
Everyone has their own way of living, every family has their own livelihood, what we can do is to make ourselves better, instead of pointing to others every day to "help".
The boss of a company told me that after he opened the company, his relatives who had not been in contact with him for a long time came to him and could settle accounts for him
How much money do you make for a project in your company, and you can make a lot of money by doing a few a year!”
I see that you have two cars, one car is 300,000 yuan, and this alone is enough for my family to eat for several years. ”
You can afford to raise so many employees, and each employee's monthly salary is calculated according to the minimum standard, and you ...... a year”
The cost of starting a company is not mentioned.
Don't just see the success of others, because only he knows the chicken feathers of others.
Also, please respect the efforts and efforts behind others, and don't settle other people's accounts if you are not clear.
Other people's accounts, no matter how well they are calculated, have nothing to do with themselves.
A writer once told about such a thing.
After he became famous, his relatives knew that he was making money.
If a relative has something to do, he will run to his house, send a souvenir today, and send a small gift tomorrow.
The writer wanted to refuse, but the writer's mother said: "Relatives, when they send things to us, they can afford us, and when he can use us in the future, isn't it just a courtesy?"”
Not long after, the children of this relative's family got engaged to borrow money, and they got married and borrowed money.
The next year, the second son of this relative's family got engaged again, and when he came to borrow money, he was rejected by the writer, because he didn't want to sell the money in **.
But my relatives don't understand, I have a problem, and you actually stand by and watch?The original kinship was like a meat bun and a dog!
Favors are the cheapest, so cheap that they don't cost a penny. But personal debt is the most expensive, so expensive that it can be repaid endlessly.
As the old saying goes:Brothers settle accounts. Not to be ruthless, but to not hurt later.
Don't owe people a favor, it's not a matter of care, it's a kind of rationality for people to behave in the world.
Do not remember the grudge of others, for hatred hurts the one who remembers it;
It is not counted as someone else's account, because other people's accounts cannot be calculated by others, and even if they are calculated, it has nothing to do with themselves.
Don't owe someone else's affection, because human debt is the most difficult debt to pay off.
I'm Red Seven-Six, follow me, and let's learn Xi, change, and grow together.