When dealing with people, you have to be cautious when you speak!
Some words hurt people when they are accidentally spoken, and they make fewer and fewer friends.
We have to be especially careful with the following words, don't step on the minefield!
It's a bad thing to splash cold water.
I still remember when I was younger, I was full of energy.
If you want to do something, someone always jumps out and says this and that.
It makes people feel bad.
It's like the scene in "Beijing Love Story".
Pony excitedly shares his plan with his friends, only to be ridiculed.
I can understand that it didn't feel good.
When you are pursuing your dreams and planning something, you need support and encouragement the most.
But there are always people who want to pour cold water on them, saying things like "this industry is too difficult" or "your idea is too naïve" and so on.
Maybe they have good intentions, but in short, they will extinguish people's enthusiasm.
I think we should know how to appreciate the efforts and dreams of others, and give them recognition and support.
If you pour cold water, it's better to say less
After all, no one wants to be in a relationship with someone who is always pouring cold water.
It's quite unbearable to preach.
Everyone has their own way and ideas, doesn't they?
Don't always preach with a condescending posture, it will easily arouse disgust and alienate you.
A friend of mine, Xiaohua, is a kind-hearted person who is always willing to help others.
However, she has some friends around her who always like to point fingers at her and tell her what to do.
Sometimes even pointing fingers back and forth in her personal life.
As a result, Xiaohua slowly alienated herself from these nagging friends.
I think,There is something to respect other people's choices and ways
Don't ask for advice when others aren't asking for advice.
Sometimes, people just want to talk to someone instead of hearing advice.
Too much interference will only make people feel uncomfortable.
Some people always like to get a foot in someone else's plan and come up with so-called "suggestions".
While the advice itself may be well-intentioned, it can be uncomfortable if it is too frequent.
For example, the plot in "The Secret That Can't Be Said".
The heroine, Serena Williams, has been facing her own confusion and challenges.
And her friend Xiao Ming always said on the side: "I think you should do this, otherwise you will regret it." ”
Although well-intentioned, it may not apply to Serena Williams, and it only makes her feel more confused.
Remember, others don't need unsolicited advice.
Hindsight is really annoying.
When something has happened, what the other person needs is comfort and support, not cold talk.
Some people just like to point fingers after something happens.
Use words like "If you would listen to me" to show that you are smart and right.
For example, my colleague Xiao Zhang, when others encounter difficulties or failures, he always comments with "it would be nice if you listened to me".
This kind of behavior is really uncomfortable because they don't help anything substantially.
I think,In the face of others' difficulties or failures, we should give understanding, comfort and support
Instead of saying irresponsible things on the sidelines.
After all, everyone's situation and choices are different, and no one can predict everything in advance.
Such words may sound reproachful.
As if to imply, "I told you a long time ago, you didn't listen to me, now something is wrong".
It's easy to think you're gloating rather than really caring about them.
Especially at work, when everyone is facing pressure and challenges together, it is important to support and understand each other.
When seeking advice, the last thing you want to hear is probably such an answer.
I've had a similar experience.
Once, I was working on an urgent project with my colleagues, and we were all under a lot of pressure.
At one meeting, I casually said something like, "I've already told you what to do, why can't you do it well?" ”
As a result, my colleagues listened and felt that I was reproaching them.
Actually, I really didn't mean that.
Therefore, we should pay more attention to our words and try to avoid giving people a sense of blame, but to give support and understanding.
After all, teamwork requires working together and understanding each other, not pointing fingers and pointing fingers.
It's easy to feel degraded when you say something like that.
Sometimes, the difficulties encountered by others may be simple for themselves, but not easy for others.
When asked for help, we should be understanding and supportive, rather than understating "it's easy".
I have a friend who is very enthusiastic, but sometimes too blunt.
Once, when her friend confided in her about the difficulties at work, she said directly: "What's so difficult about this, it's easy to solve!" ”
Her friends felt that they were not understood, and gradually became estranged.
So,We need to learn to be more sensitive and considerate when communicating with othersGive the other party enough understanding and support.
Rather than easily using simplicity to evaluate the plight of others.
After all, everyone's feelings and difficulties are unique.
Some people sigh and sigh all day long, everything is not going well, and they complain to others everywhere.
How could I be so unlucky? "The world is so unfair. ”
People's hearts have changed, who can still be trusted. ”
I heard a lot of this kind of complaint, and I was depressed together.
Also, don't always find fault.
You're always picky about other people's things.
This doesn't work, and that doesn't work either. "You're not doing well enough. ”
When you hear this kind of talk, people think you are picky.
Finally, don't always see the problem and not think about the solution.
This problem cannot be solved. "This difficulty cannot be overcome. ”
In this case, people will think that you are not motivated, and no one wants to cooperate with you.
In the TV series "The Golden Years", Jiang Nansun's family suffered an accident, her life became a mess, and she began to complain about her fate and the people around her.
Her friends thought she was negative, and there were fewer and fewer friends.
So, you have to pay attentionDon't say these words of complaint and negative energy
Some people know all day long to brag about themselves.
How good I am. "There's no one else to do anything like that. ”
How awesome I am. "I'm doing a lot better than you. ”
How much money I have, how much power I have. ”
Or "How many places have I been, how many people have I met." ”
If you say this kind of thing, people will think that you are too self-righteous, vain, and an arrogant maniac, and they are unwilling to associate with you.
In the TV series "Thirty Only", Gu Jia bought a valuable bag in order to integrate into the circle of wives, and she deliberately put the bag in a conspicuous position at the party, wanting to show off her wealth.
The other wives thought she was vain and didn't want to associate with her.
These are my true stories, from my friends' own experiences, as well as my own experiences of what I have seen and heard.
These examples illustrate how powerful a sentence can be.
When interacting with others, we must learn to empathize and think more about the other person.
Don't say things that hurt others, so that you can build good relationships and have more and more friends.
Therefore, we should choose our words carefully and avoid saying things that may ruin our connections.