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Li Xiaoqiang is a native of Shanxi, 22 years old this year, and his dream since he was a child was to become an actor. He is often immersed in the world of TV series and movies.
After graduating from high school, Li Xiaoqiang told his parents about his dream, but his parents strongly opposed it. They hope that Li Xiaoqiang can find a stable job to support his family.
Li Xiaoqiang was unwilling to give up his dream, and resolutely left his hometown to seek opportunities in Hengdian, a film and television base. He knows that this is the place where countless stars were born, and maybe here, he can find his own opportunity.
Li Xiaoqiang sat on the train to Hengdian, nervous and excited, as if he saw the moment when he became an actor.
But Li Xiaoqiang didn't know that Hengdian was not only the starting point of his dream, but also the end of his dream. As the largest film and television shooting base in China, hundreds of film and television dramas are filmed here at the same time every day.
The massive demand for extras has attracted countless young people with dreams of stardom, and they are known as "horizontal drifters".
However, the dreams of the vast majority of those who pursue their dreams are also shattered. The crowds and the harsh reality have left many drifters disoriented. Most of them eventually failed to achieve fame and fortune, and instead lost themselves in this holy land of dreams.
From the moment Li Xiaoqiang stepped into Hengdian full of longing and expectation, he had already embarked on a road with no end. It is an incubator for dreams and a purgatory of despair.
Our protagonist, Li Xiaoqiang, is about to embark on a journey in life on this stage that he never imagined.
Li Xiaoqiang came to Hengdian and was surprised to find that there were about 200,000 Hengpiao living here. Most of them live at the bottom of society, and their temporary shelters are very shabby.
Some people even have to sleep on stalls or outdoor benches, and they generally face poor accommodation and eating conditions.
What's even more unacceptable is that the women here are willing to sell their bodies in order to get the opportunity to perform. Some crew members even took advantage of their helplessness to sexually exploit them.
Li Xiaoqiang witnessed a young and beautiful girl being forcibly dragged into the room by a middle-aged man, and the girl did not have the slightest expression on her face.
Li Xiaoqiang is very worried about the mental state of many sideways actors. They often make a big fuss in public places, claim to be stars, and do all sorts of weird moves in front of the camera to attract attention, and even make a big fuss in the crew.
Li Xiaoqiang looked at these crazy actions and couldn't help but wonder if they still kept their senses.
This is the state of existence of 200,000 people floating in Hengdian, struggling in an environment of poverty, chaos and depravity. Li Xiaoqiang wants to realize his dream of being an actor in this place, and the possibility is very small. Behind the glory of the stars, there are the blood and tears of countless losers.
Among the many drifting actors, there are indeed a small number of people who come with simple dreams. For example, Lao Liu, whom Li Xiaoqiang knows, is a Beijinger in his forties. He dreamed of becoming an actor since he was a child, so he came to Hengdian, starting from the most grassroots work, accumulating experience, and taking one step at a time.
Lao Liu told Li Xiaoqiang that he recently got a two-shot role in a TV series.
This is a new starting point for me. "Lao Liu said,"After my continuous efforts, I am about to grow from an unknown group performer to a real actor. "
However, the mentality of most sideways drifters is very different. Li Xiaoqiang observed that many Hengpiao do not really pursue their acting dreams, they just want to come to Hengdian to try their luck and see if they can become big stars and make a lot of money.
They don't really love acting, but see it as a shortcut to wealth.
There are also some people who choose to come to Hengdian to escape life because they can't face real life. An example is Xiao Zhao, whom Li Xiaoqiang knows, who opened a small shop in his hometown and has average business.
Later, I heard that Hengdian group performances can make quick money, so I decided to try my luck here.
Anyway, I don't have any career, come here for a few years, maybe one day I will become popular. Xiao Zhao said.
Through observation and communication, Li Xiaoqiang gradually learned that most of the drifters came here with luck and escape. Their pursuit of their dreams is no longer so pure.
When he first arrived in Hengdian, Li Xiaoqiang had illusions about the group of Hengpiao. He firmly believes that as long as he works hard, he can stand out among many dreamers and become a star.
It wasn't until one day that a crew openly recruited temporary group performances that Li Xiaoqiang truly experienced the fierceness and cruelty of the competition.
A courtyard of less than 100 square meters was crowded with hundreds of people, all vying for a spot on the only a few dozen extras. Li Xiaoqiang was squeezed forward, and some people even scratched his arm.
Finally, in the midst of the chaos, he squeezed to the front and got a work permit for the extras.
On the day of work, Li Xiaoqiang was arranged to stand behind the camera of the two starring opponents. The director had him move back and forth with other extras to simulate a scene where the crowd moved.
However, after a morning of shooting, there was no shot of Li Xiaoqiang's area. He was a little disappointed, but he was still happy that he had obtained the status of an actor.
After that, Li Xiaoqiang participated in the filming of several different crews, but they were all still similar to the coolie roles on the first day, or they were off-camera set boards. Even the occasional close-up of a second or two was cut out by the director.
Li Xiaoqiang gradually realized that he was still far from a real actor.
One day, Li Xiaoqiang excitedly told his family that he had participated in a certain TV series and said the role he played. However, when they look for footage of his performance on TV together, they don't find him.
Until this moment, Li Xiaoqiang knew that all his shots were cut out in the final ** film and television works, leaving no trace.
One night, Li Xiaoqiang sat alone in the night breeze in Hengdian, he looked at the stars in the sky, and his heart was full of confusion and confusion. He thought, what about his dream of coming to Hengdian with ideals? It's only been a few months, and he seems to have turned into a real loser.
After a few months of drifting life, Li Xiaoqiang finally saw the true face of this group. He found that many people who say that they are pursuing their dreams of being actors, but in fact their lives are extremely irregular and have nothing to do all day.
They are also unwilling to find a serious job in a down-to-earth manner, but choose to rely on the unstable temporary job of group performances to make ends meet.
We are here for our dreams, how can we do those boring jobs! "When Li Xiaoqiang tried to persuade a new acquaintance to change his lifestyle, the other party retorted.
Li Xiaoqiang suddenly realized that many of the mentality of Heng Piao had deceived themselves to such an extent, and they deliberately confused the difference between chasing dreams and being passive and lazy, so as to spend their time in Hengdian with peace of mind.
Li Xiaoqiang felt absurd and hopeless about this kind of collective self-deception. They live in poverty, and they can't even buy a new dress, but they still keep saying that they want to be stars. It was a sight that made him feel ridiculous and a deep sense of despair.
Li Xiaoqiang gradually understood why Hengdian was called a "madhouse", because most people here had lost their minds and fallen into an obsession with illusory dreams.
These people would rather live in a dream than wake up and face the cruelty of real life. The madhouse, made up of 200,000 drifters, is a spiritual refuge for them to escape reality and failure.
Li Xiaoqiang began to wonder if he would become one of them, and he began to reflect that if he continued like this, he would lose his passion and courage, and he would end up like those walking dead.
Li Xiaoqiang came here to pursue his dreams, not to be satisfied with standing still. He shouted to himself in his heart that it was time to make a resolute change.
A month later, Li Xiaoqiang left Hengdian. Before leaving, he wandered in the place that had filled him with infinite longing. Although all the scenes seem to have been seen before, it makes people feel as if the world has been turned upside down.
This land carries many broken dreams, and I almost became one of the losers. Only when you wake up can you spread your wings and soar again.