As everyone knows.
Physical contact is the most primitive instinct of human beings.
It is true that the intimacy between a man and a woman is the original basis for maintaining a love relationship, but it is not the only one.
If the relationship between the sexes is to develop in the long run, physiological factors only occupy a small part, and more importantly, spiritual needs.
An intimate relationship can last a long time, and in addition to the body, there are these...
is needed
In the current era, more and more women are pursuing independence and self-determination, and they have lived a life that is invincible and fearless.
They do everything by themselves, carry everything by themselves, and they feel that they don't need anyone and can live a good life.
At this time, men are worthless in their hearts.
Tribulation and Loyalty".
There is nothing more intoxicating about a woman than to be delicate in front of a man. ”
Every man is somewhat machismo, enjoying the feeling of being needed, and enjoying the dependence and trust from his beloved.
You need his help when you are in trouble, covet his comfort when you are wronged, rely on his companionship when you are lonely, and seek his protection ......... when you are hurt
Every time you need, you can make him feel a sense of existence, make him feel his indispensable importance, and satisfy his inner little vanity.
If a man has never been needed, and the woman carries everything by herself, solves all the troubles by herself, and does not let him participate, or even let him know, he will feel that in the woman's heart, he is dispensable, and he feels that he is not needed, which will lead to a deep sense of frustration, and in the long run, it will lead to an imbalance in the relationship between them.
Sometimes it is not enough to rely on a sincere heart for feelings, and it also requires a little skill.
So, show weakness appropriately, try to rely on him, let him feel your love and need, in order to make the relationship more intimate.
Be recognized
There are many people who are picky about their men in all kinds, complaining that men don't work hard to earn less, complaining that men come home late, and complaining that men don't understand romance.
Men begin to become depressed, as if they are doing nothing right, doing too much wrong, and finally simply choosing to give up on themselves.
When a man is denied by a woman everywhere, it will inevitably lead to the loss of all his ability to act.
Psychologist William James said:
The most pressing need of human nature is the desire to be recognized. ”
What a man needs is actually very simple, a word of praise and recognition, a loving affirmation, can make him happy and high-spirited.
The more you identify with him, the more energetic and brilliant he will be; The more you hit him, the more he doesn't want to do it.
Zhang Ailing once said:
A woman's love for a man must always be a little worshipful; Women are happy when they worship, and men are happy when they are worshipped.
If you love him, you believe in him, praise him, and support him.
When he feels your appreciation and affirmation, he will feel a sense of happiness and accomplishment with you, and he will love you even more.
to be seen
You can often see such scenes in life:
After a tiring day of traveling, the man came home to tie an apron and cook a woman's favorite dish.
The man worked an extra month just to make more money and buy the bag that the woman loved the most.
But all his efforts, the woman turned a blind eye.
Roland says in the book "Intimacy":
The essence of marriage is the desire to be seen by the other person. 〞
Whether it is a husband and wife or a lover, a beautiful relationship is "with you in my eyes."
He can see your hard work, so he knows how to feel distressed; You can see him carrying the load, so you know how to understand.
Many men like to hide their love in their hearts and silently implement it into action, but in fact, he selfishly wants you to see all the efforts he has made for you.
If a woman takes this for granted, instead of being moved, she ignores and dislikes it, which will make the other party more and more tired.
Writer Chen Haixian once said:
In a relationship, people are actually not afraid of giving, but they are afraid that they are not being seen to give, so they feel that it is not worth it. ”
True, it is. It is not easy for a man to support his family, and he is more nostalgic for a warm lamp left for him by a woman after work late at night, and a cup of hot tea made for him than the warmth in bed.
This means that his dedication is in your eyes and hurts in your heart.
When men and women get along, you don't have to be too reckless and independent in front of men, your dependence and need for him, recognize and see his sincerity. It is what men want more, and it is also the guarantee that the relationship can last for a long time.