When a woman makes up her mind to divorce and she doesn't hesitate to run away from sarcasm, what exactly is she thinking?
When a woman is determined to divorce, she will not consider the feelings for many years, and she doesn't seem to care about the harm that divorce will do to her children, she is indifferent and ruthless, as if she has completely changed a person, no matter what you say to her or how you explain it, she doesn't listen, so what is she thinking at this time? Family marital affection
As a teacher who has been engaged in marriage counseling for many years, I would like to tell youIt doesn't mean that a woman has really become a ruthless stone person, it's just that at this moment her emotions dominate her actions, she is completely unable to work seriously, and she thinks that it is entirely your problem that the marriage can develop to this point, and you cannot change it. So only by leaving, can her emotions calm down and her life return to normal, this is what a woman thinks.
But in reality, this idea is illogical. Why? Because in the early stages of marriage, when there is a conflict, she does not choose to learn and grow, does not choose to understand your emotions, does not choose how to solve the problem. She only expects you to change her bad temper, does not expect you to ask her for love, and does not expect you to understand her. Of course, in the process, she also gives and endures, but forbearance is temporary and will hurt herself. So,Later, when this contradiction continued to escalate, she chose to stop the loss in time, no longer expected from you, and chose to divorce.
And divorce needs a reason, then her reason is that she is too disappointed in youHer love is exhausted, and she wants to live for herself。So everybody can see thatBehind the anger and desperation is actually fear, fear of giving, fear of being let down, fear of facing the current family, fear of dealing with children's problems. Therefore, in order to rationalize her actions and make herself feel better, she can only put all the blame on you, let you take it all and bear the consequences, and she just wants to escape.
When many women first file for divorce, they are actually very depressed and feel helpless. She will choose not to communicate, not to go home, and to resort to all kinds of escapes. It should be clarified that at this time, it is not that the trouble has reached the point of being out of control, but because the two parties continued to accuse each other, the contradictions continued to intensify, and finally they could only divorce.
At this time,If you don't want to hasten the end of your marriage, don't use your own thinking to gauge the other person's feelings, and don't try to convince the other person with clichéd theories. These efforts are ultimately futile, and they will even push for the end of the marriage with their own hands.
Then you must ask, is there no other solution? Is there no room for manoeuvre?
No matter how the other party insists on divorce, he will not do anything for the sake of divorce. You need to ask yourself if you have the obsession to resolutely not divorce in your heart? Are you ready to save your marriage?
When you read my article, think about it:
Have you taken substantial action other than taking humble steps to constantly stalk the other person, or trying to morally kidnap the other person?
In the process of your frequent apologies, do you really recognize that you are wrong?
After each apology, have you really changed?
Is your saying that you want to give your children a complete home for the sake of your children, is this just a mantra? Only you know whether it is for the sake of the child or the use of the child to bind the other person.
Many people mistakenly believe that in the process of saving a marriage, as long as they play a humble role, they can use moral kidnapping to influence the other party and save the marriage. However, marriage repair is actually a practice of self-change, and you need to constantly improve yourself, change yourself, and improve yourself in the process to become the right person for your marriage to have a chance to turn things around.
If you want to take action that will help you save your marriage, you must act now. Don't always emphasize your feelings or the so-called responsibilities of both parties, and don't waste time on words. Because what the other person really wants is not your verbal tragic confession, but a radical change.
If you're experiencing a similar problem but don't know what to do, you can talk to me.