My name is Lin Wan'er, I am 28 years old this year, and I have been married for two years. I always wanted to have a child, but my husband insisted that he wouldn't. Every time he talked about it, he always used the excuse that we were still young and should enjoy the world for two.
But I don't think we're young anymore, and I want a child to enrich our lives. I tried to talk to him, but he always avoided it and even lost his temper.
I was confused and didn't know why this was happening. I felt that our married life was getting colder and colder, as if there was nothing left to talk about between us. I began to wonder if my husband didn't love me anymore.
Until one day, I happened to meet my husband's friend on the street, and he told me a truth that shocked me. It turned out that the reason why the husband did not want children was because he already had an illegitimate child.
When I heard the news, I was stunned. I don't know how to deal with this fact, and I don't know how to deal with it. I remembered the good times we used to spend together, and remembered the vows we once made to walk together for the rest of our lives.
I felt deeply betrayed and I didn't know how to continue the marriage. I wanted a divorce, but I didn't know how to face my future life. I began to feel lost and helpless.
I used to try to talk to my husband, but he always avoided talking about it and even lost his temper. I felt like he had become a stranger and I didn't know how to approach him.
Eventually, I decided to seek professional help. I found a marriage counselor who listened to me talk about my confusion and pain. She told me that dealing with this situation requires calmness and sanity, and not being swayed by emotions.
At her suggestion, I decided to join my husband in marriage**. In the early days, we all acted cold to each other and were reluctant to open up. But as time went on, we began to gradually open our hearts and begin to communicate openly about our feelings and thoughts.
My husband told me that he didn't want children because he was afraid that we would become as cold and detached as his parents. He is afraid that after having a child, we will quarrel over the trivial matters of the child, which will eventually lead to the breakdown of the marriage.
I felt very distressed, because my husband had such worries and fears in his heart. I decided to give him more support and love, so that he knew that I would always be there for him to face the challenges ahead.
Gradually, our relationship began to improve. We began to communicate our thoughts and feelings more openly and more actively to solve problems between us. We began to rebuild trust and understanding, and our marriage began to become stronger and more stable.
Although we don't have children of our own, we have begun to try to accept this fact and start looking for other ways to enrich our lives. We began to pay more attention to each other's growth and development, and began to participate more actively in each other's social circles and interests.
I also started to re-examine my values and lifestyle. I found myself once seeing children as the whole and only goal of life, and neglecting other equally important things. I began to focus more on my career and personal growth, and began to look for other ways to realize my value and meaning in life.
Although our marriage has faced crises and challenges, through honest communication, understanding and support for each other, we have overcome the difficulties and rebuilt a strong and stable marriage. We have also learned to appreciate each other's presence and care more, and we have learned to deal with problems in our marriage more maturely and rationally.
Now that we have passed a few years, our marriage is still strong and stable. We will still encounter challenges and difficulties, but we are confident that together we will face and overcome them. Because we believe that love and support for one another is eternal and the most precious asset in our marital relationship.