The old proverb warns us that a woman's destiny is like a delicate seed that grows only when it falls on fertile soil. And the writer Yu Hua once thoughtfully pointed out: Some women may not need to make any effort to find a happy married life; Others are good-natured, but they are afflicted by human sickness. Fate is like a flying dandelion, fluttering with the natural wind, and the wind stops and returns to calm.
A woman's life path is undoubtedly tortuous and complicated, and whether or not she finds her ideal partner, she should maintain strong wisdom and independent spirit. Especially when women enter the age after retirement, the factors that determine whether they are happy in their old age do not only depend on the filial piety of their children or the savings they have accumulated. On the contrary, the way women themselves behave often plays a crucial role.
Here, we have listed four possible problems that women may have in retirement that can have a negative impact on their later years and therefore require extra attention and vigilance.
1.It is excessive self-sacrifice to cater to the needs of others. Many women are passionate about the development of the family and their children, and are willing to devote their life force to the family. Although they think it's worth it for their families, the excessive sacrifice actually only moves them. For those family members who do not know how to appreciate and cherish, excessive giving may become an extreme punishment for themselves.
Take Sister Liu, a colleague of our company, as an example, she is respected by everyone as a good wife and mother, not only thrifty and frugal, so that the family has no worries about food and clothing, but also she is enthusiastic about serving others and caring for her wife and children. However, this woman suffered betrayal from her wife and dislike from her son in her later years. The reason is that she was so focused on the needs of her husband and children in her youth that she neglected her own image and feelings. After retirement, she devoted herself to her family, and although she brought a beautiful atmosphere and a clean environment to the family, she was troubled by the fact that she did not receive the corresponding reward. Her selfless dedication ended up being a heavy burden for her and her family.
2.It is to neglect one's own health and always prioritize the interests of others. Many women retire around the age of 50 and continue to work and invest their income in supporting their families and providing for their children's education. For example, in the community where we live, there is a 76-year-old woman named Aunt Jia, who has been retired for more than 20 years, but still chooses to work in multiple positions. Although her monthly pension income can reach more than 8,000 yuan, she is still willing to provide her son with financial assistance ranging from more than 10,000 yuan a month to help him form a new family.
However, in exchange for her self-sacrificing method, her body gradually weakened and her quality of life continued to decline. Looking at her aging figure, we sigh that health is the greatest wealth in life. If you lose your physical health, no amount of money can recoup what you have lost. Once you fall into the situation of illness or disability, you can deeply understand the ruthlessness in human nature, and how sad such a sad old age should be!
3. Fail to understand and value self-worth, and always give priority to others about good things. In real life, there are a number of women, whether in the prime of their youth or in their twilight years, who always maintain a view that they do not deserve to enjoy beautiful things or days. Although they have no financial and living needs, they still maintain strict standards for themselves.
For example, when they have a little money to give, they always think that they are old and receive a secure monthly pension, compared to the hard work of their children and the need to take care of their grandchildren. Therefore, if you enjoy high-end clothes or food, it seems to be like depriving your children and grandchildren of their rightful rights, full of guilt. After marriage, the children at home send their belongings back to bring new vitality and abundant life to the big family, but these women always stay in the backyard of Guitang, refusing to eat those high-quality ingredients and delicacies, believing that they should be left to their thriving grandchildren, hard-working sons, and lovers who earn more than their pensions.
In fact, this type of woman has a deep inferiority complex deep down, believing that she does not deserve these good material benefits, and that she is also unable to enjoy a stable and peaceful good time. When their husbands smile at them and show their concern, they see it as proof of their affection. Women who have been immersed in this state of mind for a long time often have difficulty experiencing happiness in life. If their efforts are not rewarded and rewarded, the sense of self-blame in their hearts will become more and more intense, so how can they revel in a good life?
4. Being in a superior living environment but never experiencing the happiness of it, falling into childish fantasy misunderstandings. In addition, there is also a category of women, after entering old age, they seem to become more and more innocent, and regard the sweet words of others as the true embodiment of ** feelings. There is a female colleague who has left her job for many years in the unit, her family conditions are good, her husband takes good care of her, and her son has a successful career.
However, since he retired, he began to like square dancing, but because he was moved by a few warm and sweet words from his dance partner, he decided to ask her husband for divorce. Not only did she selflessly dedicate her family's savings for her partner to invest in venture capital, but she even assisted her dance partner in deceiving her husband, who had been with her for decades, and when the family's savings were ransacked, the marriage broke down, the dance partner disappeared, and even the son she respected no longer paid attention to her existence.
February**Dynamic Incentive Plan Today, it is difficult to find the happy figure of the year, and she is still looking for part-time opportunities to earn living expenses in her 60s, renting a house to live, and her living situation can be described as embarrassing and difficult. After a few years, although I have asked acquaintances to help communicate with my ex-husband several times in an attempt to save this broken marriage, the ending still failed to achieve my hope. The reason for this tragic ending is the neglect and waste of a happy life. For this situation, we can't help but sigh: being born in the midst of happiness and not knowing the blessing is by no means an unprovoked disaster, on the contrary, it is precisely because of the lack of perception of happiness and the heart of cherishing that countless women have fallen into the miserable situation of "living in the present".
If retired women want to truly realize the life state of "old age is happy, happy and happy", the good character traits of wise people are crucial. Not only are they good at handling family matters, but they also know how to care for themselves, putting their physical and mental health first. Treat relatives and close friends around him magnanimously, cherish the family ties with his family, and have a sense of prevention and resistance to the bad habits he encounters, which can be called a "wise man" in the true sense.