Story: After my mother died, my sister and I were placed in the care of our biological father, but we began to fall into nightmares
I am two years older than my sister.
When I was a child, my mother often touched my head and said to me, "Xiaojie, you must take good care of your sister." At that time, my sister was still an infant baby, and she slept round and pink. From that moment on, I made up my mind to be my sister's hero.
As time passed, my sister grew up. Dad would compliment her on how she looked like Mom when she was younger, and the neighbors around her would praise her sister. However, there was little joy on my mother's face, and she was often shut up in her room alone.
One day, when I came home from school early, I heard my mother's cry from behind the locked door. Although he wanted to go in and comfort her, her father often said, "Don't worry about adults, children." "Maybe I really couldn't understand what was going on between them, so I quietly left.
Textbooks say that children are the crystallization of their parents' love.
One year, however, I overheard relatives whispering that my mother had been "forced to marry my father" and that she had "been when she was young, and she had to marry her father." At the time, I didn't understand what it meant to be "".
That night, I wanted to ask my mother what this meant, but when I saw my mother's haggard face because she was taking care of my sister, I held back the question.
During that time, my sister was crying every day, and my father would never come home, saying that he would work overtime on the construction site, but I once saw my father standing on the balcony under the dim street lamp and smoking. Maybe he waited for his mother to put his sister to sleep before coming home.
I thought that as my sister grew up, the future would get better and better, but the reality was not that way.
When I was in the fourth grade, my mom passed away. She was depressed all day, and her father often scolded her loudly for showing her face.
Eventually, one day, my mother swallowed a lot of pills in a locked room and died before she was thirty years old.
People are lamenting that they passed away at such a young age. There are also people who comfort Dad, saying that it doesn't matter, and the next one can be found.
At that time, my sister was still very young, and her ignorant eyes were full of innocence. She didn't understand what was going on, and I knew very well that from that day on, we didn't have a mom anymore.
Our dad worked on a construction site, and he was considered the foreman's right-hand man.
I once went to the place where he worked, and while completing his homework, I observed his busy figure before and after, buying cigarettes for the foreman and bringing food for the workers. Everybody liked him, at least as far as I could observe.
Dad showed a humility and humility on the construction site that I had never seen at home. He always nods his head and serves his colleagues, and only when it comes to the education of his children, his eyes shine with a unique light, and then he starts talking.
In this environment, he seems to be a different person, always humble and humble. It is only when he talks about the education of his children that his eyes shine with a different kind of light, and then he begins to talk loudly.
At home, Dad's authority is unquestionable. He always referred to me as "bitch" for as long as I can remember.
At first, I thought it was a father's exclusive affectionate name for his son, until I found out when I was in elementary school that the fathers of my classmates didn't call them "dogs" and used more affectionate nicknames.
At first, I thought my dad might hate me because he never called me "Little Jie" gently.
I don't know when he started to like to teach me a lesson. At first, he just slapped me on the back of the head, and I thought it was a way of expressing affection between father and son, so I always responded to him with a grin.
However, as time went on, there were more and more slaps, punches, kicks, etc., and in the worst case, I was so painful that I couldn't help but moan and couldn't even stand up on the ground.
However, my sister did not know about it, and she was forcibly sent back to her room.
Initially, I would instinctively resist and struggle a few times because of the pain, but my dad would cut my hands back, tie them up with a skipping rope, and then continue to "educate" me with a clothes fork or other tools.
Over time, I stopped resisting, so as not to suffer for myself.
At the end of every time, Dad always gently stroked the head of the ** and said, "It's all for your good." As the old saying goes, filial piety comes out under the stick, and if you don't beat the child, you won't be talented. "He would gently wipe away my tears.
At this time, I felt again that it seemed that only my father still loved me.
My dad would also tell his neighbors about this "educational theory" in an unprecedentedly gentle tone and with a message that was expecting my future success.
As a result, my father became an "education expert" in our community, and everyone praised him as a good father who wanted his son to become a dragon and was conscientious.
They also mentioned that there were examples of wolf parents polishing their children to enter prestigious schools, and they said that I would also follow that path of success.
Dad enjoyed the compliments and drank when he was happy, and he drank a lot during that time.
The neighbor's aunt told me: "Xiaojie, maybe your father once beat you, but he did it for your good." Boys are just easy to be naughty, and they will be obedient after a few more hits. Don't hate your father, there's something you can do to find your aunt. ”
I see. I immediately understood.
Dad is for my good, it's his way of showing love.
I accepted it all, and in the days to come, I would just bury my head deeper and not let out a wail.
I want to accept my father's "love" in its entirety so that I can respond to his expectations for me in the future.
Although, Dad's "love" really hurts.
My sister grew up and seemed to get used to the scene of me being reprimanded by my father.
When I was being taught a lesson, she would turn on the TV unmoved, and I tried to stay calm so as not to scare my sister.
I thought that my father's expectations were only for me, however, as time went on, my sister gradually reached the age of going to school.
The first time I noticed something unusual about my sister was when she was in the fifth grade.
That day, when I came home from cram school and opened the door with the key around my neck, I found that the curtains in the living room had been unusually closed, and only a faint light was streaming in from the outside.
My sister was huddled on the living room couch, her figure small and quiet, barely noticeable to me.
I quietly walked over to chat with my sister.
The younger sister suddenly turned around, curled up nervously, and trembled.
A sense of foreboding came over me.
I asked, "Mengmeng, what's wrong with you?" ”
My sister suddenly screamed, her cry fierce and full of fear: "Don't call me Mengmeng! Don't call me Mengmeng! ”
Her hysteria upset me.
I tried to reassure her, but her struggles left me helpless.
In the chaos, my sister's blouse was lifted, and through the faint light, I saw a visible bruise on her stomach.
I immediately understood, it turned out to be Dad.
My sister's sobs brought me back to my senses.
I don't know why my dad hurt my sister, the only thing I can do now is comfort her. I gently hugged my sister like a small ball of cotton.
Sister, don't be afraid. I said, "Dad is also doing this for our future happiness, so don't cry." ”
My sister slowly stopped crying under my comfort, and she hugged me tightly, and we gave each other warmth.
That night, Dad came home drunk again. From his words, I learned that he had been trying to find us a new mother, but the woman I saw that day disliked him and even thought he was not even a contractor, so she left.
He was full of anger and had nowhere to vent, and when he came home to find that his sister was not doing her homework, but was watching cartoons, everything finally exploded.
Not long ago, I learned a new word: "anger".
I began to wonder, did Dad really beat us for our good? Is it really all because of love? I love my sister, but my heart breaks when I look at her tears.
And Dad saw our painful expression, but it was more like a kind of pride, as if we found in us a pleasure of domination that we could not get from others.
Looking back carefully, the pain that Dad brought us seems to be getting deeper and deeper day by day.
It can't go on like this, at least not with his young sister.
Therefore, I decided to seek the help of someone more powerful.
One day, I suddenly remembered that Aunt Zhang had said that no matter what happened, I could find her.
So, one day I plucked up the courage to knock on her door. I showed her the scars on my body and detailed my sister's experience of heartbreak because of it.
When Aunt Zhang listened to my narration, her face was full of surprise. Then, she offered to take me home and said that she would persuade our father.
That night, Dad came home with a very bad face.
He called my sister and me and coldly asked who was going to make the little report? He described the scene when he was stopped by Aunt Zhang downstairs, his face was full of facelessness, and he laughed all the way, and how people passing by looked at his jokes.
Dad grew angrier and angrier, and I could even see horrible green veins popping out of his forehead.
At that moment, I was going to confess and suddenly felt scared. So I chose to remain silent, and my sister was so frightened that she dared to sob.
Dad suddenly let out a terrifying roar, "Cry, cry, you know crying!" What else would you do but cry! He reached out and shoved his petite sister hard.
The younger sister, who had lost her center of gravity, stumbled backwards and slammed her head straight into the corner of the coffee table. Bright red and warm blood poured out of her head in an instant.
I screamed and covered my sister's wounds, but the blood kept coming out.
Dad froze in place, he didn't seem to expect this to happen. The face that had turned the color of pork liver due to the effect of alcohol suddenly turned pale. He hurriedly took out his mobile phone and dialed the first aid**, his voice stumbling.
Only then did I realize that my father was also scared.
In the end, my sister was taken to the emergency room by the doctors and **s. I waited outside the emergency room, and when I came back to my senses, I realized that my sister's blood had coagulated on my hands and clothes.
I wailed helplessly in the hospital until my tears dried up, and my throat was still roaring like a beast.
After a long, long time, my sister was miraculously rescued. It's just that from that day on, she became reticent.
The doctor said it might have been caused by a blow to the brain, which required long-term rest.
Then the doctor angrily asked the father, how could the child become like this?
Dad explained in a low voice that it was the elder brother and sister who didn't know the severity of the game and injured the younger sister.
I retorted loudly, no! Not me! It's ......
But my father glared at me fiercely, and just like that, a familiar sense of fear instantly enveloped me. I couldn't say a word from my trembling lips, and in the end, I could only remain silent.
The day the ambulance came, there was a lot of movement, and it didn't take long for my sister to be seriously injured because of me, and everyone in the community soon knew about it, and Aunt Zhang's eyes were full of helplessness when she looked at me, and she was probably disappointed in me.
I didn't make any defenses, because I could see that my voice didn't matter to the good people at all, they just liked to talk about other people's affairs. I just went to the hospital on time every day to take care of my sister until she was discharged home.
Her hair was shaved and she wore ugly, bulky protective gear. Such a sister will not be able to go to school for a long time - but keeping her sister at home means that she has to face her father alone.
I was so worried that I even said to my sister, either my brother won't go to school anymore, and my brother will watch you at home.
That day, my sister finally spoke to me.
She said slowly, but her brother couldn't do anything, at that time, my father asked who did it, and my brother didn't even dare to say a word, not a word to admit it.
Her eyes were full of strange distance when she looked at me, and it was the first time I had ever seen such a sister.
But she quickly sighed again, and said, "But I have no one to rely on now but my brother."
I swear I won't let my sister down a second time.
Then there was a turning point when our dad went to the hospital.
When I was doing my homework at home, I suddenly received a ** from my father's worker, and he hurriedly said that my father was sent to the hospital and asked me to go and see it.
God knows how excited I was at that time!
But when I got to the hospital, it turned out to be very disappointing – my dad was still alive. Even though he was weakly hanging from the water, he continued to dictate to me.
Later, I learned that my father didn't know that a bee flew from ** when he was at work. Dad who was upset by the buzzing sound casually lifted a brick and was about to crush the insect, probably sensing that the crisis was coming, and the bee that was still hiding in the east stung Dad's neck fiercely.
At first, Dad thought he had just been stung, and after scolding him for bad luck, he planned to continue working. But within a few minutes, he felt that he had difficulty breathing, and then collapsed on the construction site, but fortunately, someone next to him saw him and brought him to the hospital in time.
Later, I learned that my father was allergic to bee venom. Just being stung can be life-threatening. Although he didn't die this time, there was a time when he couldn't hurt my sister and me.
I happily went home and told my sister about it.
I said in an exaggerated tone, if only one day he stabbed the honeycomb! All the bees and wasps are going to sting him and bite him! Sting him into a turnip! My sister was amused by me and giggled.
It was the first time she had smiled so much since she was injured. I'm glad too.
My sister and I painted a lot of pictures with colored brushes that day, all of which were pictures of my father being stung by bees and being chased by bees. We swim in such fantasies and feel immense joy.
Before going to bed at night, my sister grabbed my finger and whispered to me a fairy tale about the princess and prince of the bee kingdom who worked together to defeat the cruel queen bee and finally lived happily together.
I love this story, it corresponds to my life with my sister and my cruel dad. The queen bee treats everything as her private property, which she can dispose of as she pleases. How I wish I could defeat that Dominator and save my sister and me.
I slowly fell asleep in my sister's story.
In the dream, the two of us held hands and lived a happy life together.
Dad was discharged from the hospital soon after.
He didn't change much because of the disaster, and he still hit me from time to time, but thankfully, he rarely harassed his sister again.
Probably because of his sister's obscure eyes, he lost interest in his sister? Or maybe he thinks I'm rough and thick-skinned, and I'm not easy to get seriously injured? Whatever the reason, I thought it was good, and my sister's safety was guaranteed for a moment.
I remember the dream I had that day, and I hope that one day I will be able to turn into a bee because of unknown magic, as in the movies.
However, in a certain class, a bee flew in from ** and buzzed around a female classmate. She was so frightened that she screamed, and the class was in chaos.
After finally regaining his composure, our teacher took advantage of this experience to tell the story from the podium that bees do not sting people, because after a bee stings, it will die on its own.
The teacher concluded that bees will not take the initiative unless they have to, so students don't need to be so scared when they see bees in the future, just wait for them to fly away on their own.
The students breathed a sigh of relief and talked about everyone's gaffe just now.
Only my face was ugly, and the disappointment burst through my chest, it turned out that even bees could not kill my father as much as they wanted.
I went home and told my sister about this new knowledge that was not very pleasant.
There wasn't much expression on my sister's face, but there was disappointment in her tone, and she said, "Well, I know that the two of us can't deal with him alone."
Seeing her immersed in regret, I forced a smile to comfort her, it's okay, we can live together, run away together, escape to another city, so that we don't have to be hurt by my father anymore!
However, my sister didn't answer me, and the smile she had just gathered suddenly turned to fear. I realized something, but I didn't dare to turn my head to look.
Son of a bitch, where did you just say you were going to run away?
I couldn't tell if my father's voice was coming from above my head or from hell.
This is probably the hardest Dad has ever beaten me.
His two arms, a pair of fists, and both legs were all in unison. He beat me with his hands and feet, and scolded me for being a white-eyed wolf, he spent so much money to support me, I actually just thought about running, and didn't take him as a father in my eyes at all, he said that he would make up for all the beatings that had been missed these days.
I can't remember what he scolded me afterwards, or rather, I couldn't hear it.
My ears were ringing, my brain seemed to be slapped into a pulp by him, and I could only vaguely see my sister begging for mercy for me.
But what's the use of that, I'm afraid it will also implicate my sister.
So I used the last of my strength to make a - leave me alone - mouth gesture to my sister. Because I can't make a sound anymore.
Receiving my signal, my sister retreated into the room little by little.
She is my best sister and she has always listened to me.
Although it has only been a decade or so, I am truly blessed to be my sister.
I was grabbed and hit the wall with my head. At that moment, a new image appeared before my eyes.
There was a buzzing sound in my ears, but it wasn't the effect of the beating, it was from my flapping wings.
Yes, I became a bee as I wished!
I was overjoyed, even though my body was much smaller than before after I became a bee, and I didn't have the flexible hands and feet that I used to have.
The first thing I did was go to my sister. I can't speak human language right now, but I just need to silently guard her from afar.
The world I saw was immensely vast, and it was an amazing experience to look down on the place I had lived in for the first time.
It didn't take much effort for me to find the unit where our house was, and just as I struggled my way up in hopes of returning to my former home, a sudden air current disrupted my course. My body suddenly lost its balance, and it was futile to let me flap my wings, and I was forced to get caught up in the window of a house.
Fortunately, it was only a small accident, and I was relieved and was about to set off again, when I heard a familiar voice from the living room.
Have you heard, the child upstairs, just that Tang Xiaojie, I see that he has been looking at him differently, do you think I should knock on their door and ask......
That's Aunt Zhang, she's calling someone else, and the center of the topic is me.
Aunt Zhang is pouring water for herself, her mouth has not stopped for a moment, I often hear their sister crying, that Tang Xiaojie fights all day and is injured, her sister was also put in the hospital by him before, the little girl is so piti......ful
I thought she was just sharing an interesting gossip about someone else's house, and I asked her for help, but I didn't get any help, and it made my sister and me worse.
Thinking of this, I felt as if my heart had been ignited by something, and I flapped my wings and rushed straight towards the middle-aged woman.
I didn't want to sting her with my own sting, because she wasn't worth my life. I just wanted to deliberately get close to her and buzz in her ears to scare her.
When she saw me, she let out a frightened scream, and she immediately put her phone and water glass on the table, waved her two hands, and shouted, go away! Go away!
But I didn't go away, I flew around her nimbly, watching her dodge with clumsy steps, and the movements were so funny that I laughed.
Her bloated body knocked over the cup she had just filled with water, and with a bang, a large circle of water was splattered on the floor.
Inexplicable mischievous thoughts rose from my mind, and I dragged her by the way, leading her step by step into the water.
Boom. The panicked Aunt Zhang really slipped and fell to the floor.
I tried to laugh triumphantly, but I found that the bees couldn't laugh, so I had to give up. I've had enough of playing and seeing enough of Aunt Zhang's ugliness, it's time to leave and find my sister.
Just as I was contented and ready to leave, Aunt Zhang's wide open mouth suddenly made a snoring sound, her face instantly turned blue-purple, and the hand that she tried to stretch out was also bruised.
It was only then that I noticed that there were two pills on the table.
Yes, I have heard that Aunt Zhang's heart is actually not very good, presumably she just poured water for herself to take medicine.
Her face had contorted, forming a sense of near-death pathos, like a fish resting on a chopping board that was not yet fully dead. I looked at her indifferently and flew up to pick up a pill.
But I didn't hand the medicine to Aunt Zhang, but put it in a place where Aunt Zhang stretched out her hand but just out of reach.
Why? Actually, I don't understand my own thoughts, maybe it's because this woman indirectly hurt my sister, or maybe it's ......I actually enjoy this feeling of playing with other people's lives and deaths? It's like my dad is basking in the pleasures that dominate me and my sister. Maybe I've become like my dad before I know it.
Aunt Zhang's eyes widened, and I couldn't read her expression whether it was fear of death or confusion about the insect in front of her.
I just watched her quietly, watching her until her pupils began to dilate.
The living room was quiet again, and the afterglow of the setting sun was shining at my feet.
I stood on the life-saving pill for a long time, then flapped my wings and left.
In my sister's room, the windows were open to provide me with easy access.
I sneaked into the room, found a hidden corner, hid in the closet, and watched my sister sit intently at her desk and paint. The only sound of pen and paper rubbing filled the room.
Suddenly, my sister let out a deep sigh, full of exhaustion. She is now the only one in the family, her hair has not yet fully grown, and the scar on her forehead looks particularly ugly.
Her exhaustion made me feel pity, and I couldn't help flapping my wings and floating in front of her. In order not to frighten my sister, I kept a delicate distance and stared at her quietly, trying to bring her some comfort.
Perhaps attracted by the sound of my wings flapping, my sister raised her head and met my gaze.
Surprisingly, she was not intimidated by me, but had a glint in her eyes. She opened her mouth to speak, but there was the sound of a key inserting the key into the lock hole outside - oops, Daddy is back!
Like Pavlov's dog, the sound of the door opening made me breathe for a moment, even though I was no longer human.
The younger sister hurriedly sorted out the items on the table and hurriedly stuffed the paper into the book. She hurried out of the room to welcome her dad home.
She walked in such a hurry that she didn't notice that a piece of paper was clamped loosely, revealing a corner.
I finally got to see the picture on it—a caricature of my dad being stung into a pig's head by a bee with colored pencils.
My sister must have missed me so much that she burst into tears because of these paintings. A warm feeling welled up in my heart, but soon I realized the danger. If Dad sees these paintings, he will definitely be angry with his sister!
What to do! Although I could easily pick up a pill, I couldn't pull out the painting that was caught in the book. Even if I tried my best, I couldn't do it.
I heard footsteps approaching in the living room, and in a panic I ducked behind my desk.
Dad and sister walked in together.
I heard my dad ask, did you study hard today?
My sister didn't answer, but I guess she must have nodded obediently.
Dad said, "That's good, you don't want to end up with that bitch."
I nervously ducked, praying that my dad would leave soon. Unfortunately, it didn't work out, and I heard my dad say something like "Are you painting?" Let me see what was drawn.
No! I cried out in my heart and heard the sound of a book being opened.
The room fell silent, save for the sound of papers shaking and Daddy's increasingly heavy breathing.
Syllable. It was a slap in the face.
Dad's voice was full of anger, and he roared, do you two little cubs want you to die! Damn it, a pack of white-eyed wolves! Lao Tzu should have strangled both of you to death in the first place!
My sister's cries mingled with my father's violent voices, and I listened to them with a shudder.
I, I'm my brother, I should protect my sister, but ......But everything out there is really terrible, what can I do? What should I do? I don't even have limbs, and I can't do anything now! Dad is not Aunt Zhang, he will not be afraid of me, he will only move two fingers and easily crush me to death!
I wanted to run away, but my sister's voice gave me some strength. She cried loudly, Daddy, don't hit me, Dad, it hurts, my head hurts! Brother! Brother!
There was another crisp slap, Dad scolded her, you called him a fart! Are you going to follow him too?
The words full of death threats brought my sister to me in the picture lying in a pool of blood, and I remembered the promise I had made to my sister that I would not let her go through that again.
The ** and violent man is not Dad, he is just a beast who treats us as private property. If I didn't protect my sister, my sister would definitely be killed by this beast, just like back then!
Anger welled up in my heart, and my stinger flickered with a cold glow.
I flew out desperately.
Yes, I'm going to die, I'm going to die because my guts were pulled out by a stinger - but I'm going to protect my loved ones, and I'm going to die with that beast with my only **!
Aunt Zhang's dying face still comes to my mind, and I don't feel afraid of killing people anymore at this moment. What's more, in my eyes, that person is not human at all.
I briefly met my sister's gaze for a second while I was flying, like in slow motion in a movie, and I put all my good hopes between those second of eye contact.
It was an amazing feeling to stick the stinger into Daddy's neck, and I heard him let out a growl and straighten his tall body.
He reached out to grab me, but I had left his skin, leaving only the unique thorn buried deep in his flesh.
The moment I was separated from the thorn, my body seemed to be emptied, the world began to spin, and I knew that my second life was coming to an end.
I struggled to brace my consciousness until the sound of my father falling to the ground gave me some comfort, and I fell to the floor weakly, and the feeling of death was no stranger to me.
I saw my sister looking for something not far away, and finally her eyes met mine.
She looked at me with a complicated look in her eyes, but with clear joy.
Just as I was about to lose consciousness completely, I noticed the shape of her mouth:
Thank you, brother.
She knew that I was my brother, and she knew that my brother was watching over her.
My heart was filled with a brief moment of joy, and then suddenly my mind was much clearer, clearer than it had ever been, perhaps a kind of dying flashback.
The story that my sister told me, the fairy tale that overthrew the cruel rule of the queen bee, may have been a hint that she wanted me to raise the knife in my hand when she learned of my father's fatal weakness.
When did my sister recognize me? Was it when I showed up? There was not the slightest surprise on her face at that time.
But why, why didn't my sister tell me to stop when she knew that I would die because the stinger was removed? When you see me on the verge of death, you don't show the slightest sadness?
Why ......Did she just quietly watch me die? It was as if everything was as it should be, and everything was expected by her.
Because she was so sure that I would protect her, and I was even willing to give my life for her.
When did my sister's innocent smile come to mind? When did my sister become like this? Unconsciously, my sister has coincided with my father's figure, so indifferent and cruel.
Children who grow up in violence will eventually become ruthless in order to protect themselves.
I slowly closed my eyes, feeling myself swallowed up by the darkness.
But it's okay, sister.
Both of us are free bees, but maybe I'm not the prince of bees in the story, I'm just a dedicated worker bee, and you're my most faithful queen. It is only natural that worker bees should die for the queen.
As long as you can be happy, as long as I protect you in the end, everything is enough.