At a gathering between relatives, the cousin's children were brought up by their grandmothers since they were children. Under the influence of intergenerational parents, when I was a child, my grandfather loved my children very much, but now that the children have grown up, the number of times they go back to their hometowns for various reasons has decreased, and the time to see the elderly is shorter, and the children seem to dislike going to their grandmother's house more and more.
Over time, many people have sensed a tendency to dislike going to grandma's house the older children get.
The reasons behind this trend are varied, and there is also a popular saying among the people: "Nephew dog, eat and leave". This sentence reveals the relationship between grandma and nephew to a certain extent.
In traditional Chinese culture, "nephew dog, eat and leave" expresses a kind of family interaction. Here, the nephew is compared to a dog, and although the metaphor is not very elegant, it vividly describes the life of the nephew in the grandmother's house.
The nephew goes to the grandmother's house, mainly to eat and play, and will leave after eating, and rarely has a long exchange and communication. This is not to say that grandma does not love her nephew, in traditional Chinese families, grandma is usually a supporting role, mainly responsible for taking care of the daily life of family members.
As children, nephews are favored objects in the family, and their arrival may break the original rhythm of grandma's life. Therefore, the grandmothers will try to meet the needs of the children as much as possible, let them eat and have fun, and then send them away.
With the improvement of people's living standards, children's living environment and entertainment methods have also undergone great changes.
They are no longer dependent on the companionship and care of family members as they used to, but are more in pursuit of freedom and independence. This change may cause their relationship with their grandmother to become more distant, reducing communication and interaction with each other.
This time, when the cousin's children came home for a party, they were asked about their grades and comparisons, and the children were very embarrassed and speechless. Comparing relatives and praising high and low has a lot of pressure and resistance on children.
Sometimes the child will be asked if it is better at grandma's house or grandma's house, and if grandma's house replies that grandma's house is good, grandma will be very angry and feel that she loves the child in vain.
Later, as the child grows older, the child begins to have more autonomy and independence, and has a deeper understanding of family relationships.
They became aware of their grandmother's role and place in the family, as well as their own role and status in the family. This awareness will cause them to pay more attention to their own face and dignity, and are unwilling to play and live at their grandmother's house without scruples as they did when they were children.
Still, the saying "nephew dog, eat and go" doesn't mean that grandma doesn't love his nephew or that nephew doesn't respect his grandma. On the contrary, the relationship is based on deep kinship, but it takes on different forms and characteristics at different ages and in different cultural contexts.
In short, although the proverb "nephew dog, eat and leave" is not very elegant, it does not mean that the child is a white-eyed wolf, it may be the influence of the above three reasons. We should respect the characteristics and laws of this relationship, strengthen communication and interaction with each other, and make the power of family affection more solid and lasting.
End: What do you think is the reason why children are reluctant to go to grandma's house when they grow up?Welcome to complain or leave a message in the comment area, it is not easy to be original, light up the attention, sharing and leaving a message.