There is a cloud in "Mencius": "Heaven will descend on people, and they must first suffer their minds, strain their muscles and bones, starve their bodies and skins, empty their bodies, and act chaotically. "Shun was appointed from farming in the fields, Fu Shuo was appointed from the work of building walls, Jiao was appointed from selling fish and salt, Guan Zhong was rescued from the prison officials and was appointed, Sun Shuao was appointed from the seclusion of the seashore, and Baili Xi was redeemed from the slave market and was appointed.
Therefore Heaven must first afflict his mind, strain his bones, make him starving, make him suffer from poverty, turn his things upside down, stir his heart, harden his disposition, and increase his abilities that he does not possess. Throughout the ages, success and failure are not accidental, and people will experience all kinds of pain and setbacks in their lives before they can finally reach the other side of success.
Nowadays, some parents don't understand, thinking that they take good care of their children, hold their children in the palm of their hands, prepare everything they need in life, and help their children solve all the problems encountered on the road to growth.
Even the children's future life path is paved in advance, that is, it is good for them, but they don't know that they may harm him in the end. People grow up slowly in trying and exploring, and sucking mother's juice is an attempt, so there is the power of life; babbling is an attempt, that's why there is language; Toddler is an attempt, so I have the courage to measure the world.
Everything was an attempt, and the final success was achieved because of a thousand failed attempts. The wife of former Indian Prime Minister Gandhi is a very wonderful woman, and as a leader, she has made outstanding contributions to India; As a mother, she is the best mentor in the hearts of her children.
Mrs. Gandhi believed that there are joys and ups and downs in life.
The purpose of education is to develop a healthy personality in children so that they can adapt to the changes in life without any hurries. As a mother, she must help her child to accept setbacks calmly and develop self-restraint.
When Mrs. Gandhi's son, Rajiv, was twelve years old, he had to undergo surgery due to illness. Faced with a nervous, frightened Rajiv, the doctor planned to comfort him with white lies such as "the operation is not painful, and there is no need to be afraid". But Mrs. Gandhi thought that the child was sensible, and such deception would not be good for the child, so she stopped the doctor.
Then she came to the child's bed and calmly told him: "There will be a few days after the operation, which can be quite painful for no one else, crying or shouting will not relieve the pain, and may also cause headaches, so you must be brave enough to bear it." Sure enough, after the operation, Rajiv did not cry or complain, he bravely endured all this.
In the process of growing up, children will have both pleasant experiences and inevitable setbacks.
Frustration is not subject to human will, nor can it be avoided by careful care from parents. On the contrary, if the child suffers some setbacks appropriately, his tolerance will increase, and his experience in dealing with things will increase, and the child will encounter the same problem again in the future, and it will be solved faster and more securely.
Therefore, educating children about frustration seems to be suppressing children, but in fact, it is like gently pressing a spring, which will make children play higher. Appropriate setbacks are a beneficial factor in helping children grow.
If parents are too protective of their children and isolate their frustrations from their children, then the child will always be a delicate grass, and he will not be able to withstand any wind and rain without the protection of his parents in the future. Therefore, parents should clearly understand that a childhood without setbacks may bring a hopeless future for their children.
However, what is needed in the face of difficulties is an ability, which is not innate, let alone given by God, but is obtained through repeated tribulations.
Parents hope that through their own efforts, their children will not experience hardships, and there is no way to let their children suffer, and they always want to build a greenhouse for their children, so that the children will not be blown by the wind, rain, or sun for a lifetime.
Instead of protecting the child, it will deprive the child of one of the most important lessons in their lives, which is experience.
If you want your child to become a talent, you must first let your child **; To make a child, be sure to give your child the right to try. From an early age, let the child consciously do what he can, don't be afraid that the child will fall, and only if he falls, he will get up;
Don't be afraid that your child will break things, and only when they break will they learn a way of doing things. At the same time, every time a child does something, it is also the best time to cultivate a sense of responsibility.