01 Don't leave no room for words.
The older we get, the more we understand.
When we are children, we can do a lot of things from our own hearts, but when we grow up, we have more and more responsibilities.
In addition to our loved ones, in front of whom can we show our truest selves?
In fact, many times speaking, it is a very important way to deal with people.
Many times we say things that make others unhappy, but we ourselves don't know why.
For example, in a relationship, we often leave no room for words.
In fact, we obviously love each other deeply, but we say that we want to separate from them.
After separation, we bear these pains on our own, and we don't know what to do.
But we can't let go, we don't want to beg for mercy, we just want the other party to please us.
So a lot of feelings are consumed like this, you always wait for the other party to come and make peace with each other, and wait for you to make peace, wait and wait, and the relationship is gone.
In fact, feelings require us to seize the opportunity, don't wait for the opportunity to pass, and then we want to keep it.
02 Make your own decisions in case of trouble.
Listening to others is one way we can make ourselves feel more secure.
We will find that many times we do not trust our own judgments and will always ask others what our judgments are.
Actually, this kind of thinking is quite normal, because falling into self-doubt is a situation that we often have.
While listening to other people's opinions does sometimes help us, if we do everything for others to refer to, then we ourselves will become less and less independent.
We should not be overly dependent on others, whether it is a relative or a friend, we must have a degree of dependence. Try to be as independent as possible, and when we face difficulties, we can also be independent.
We will find that when we are children, we often ask others to help us make decisions because we know so little that we don't know what the meaning of making decisions is.
But when we grow up, we are responsible for everything we do, so some of the decisions you make should come from your heart so that you don't regret it so much in the future.
We will find that many times we regret the decision after we have made it, because there are so many choices in front of us, and we always feel that the other option is better than the current one.
In fact, this is not the case, it's just that we are not good at observing, we make our choices, we naturally have our own reasons, since we have made a good choice, we should stop thinking nonsense.
03 Don't help too much.
Helping others is indeed something we do a lot because it is a good virtue.
We often find that our loved ones and our teachers tell us to help others as much as we can when they are in trouble.
In fact, many of us are very kind, we often sympathize with others, and we are afraid that others will be hurt.
We may even sacrifice our own interests to help others do something.
But there needs to be a premise for doing everything, if we always help others, will others take our help for granted?
It's like some people, after you've helped, they think they can handle it even without you.
In fact, for some people, the help we provide is useless, because they simply do not appreciate it.
It's not that we have to reciprocate the help we have to give back to others, but that love is mutual, and one person cannot give it all and one person fully enjoy the result.
Sometimes we help others so often that it makes them a habit.
Kind help is good, but we also need to consider whether our help will inadvertently hurt others.
04Don't be too direct.
Some people always say that they are very direct and always say that they are a frank and unrestrained person.
Direct people often talk or do things without worrying too much.
They don't try to calculate others because they always feel that the world is simple.
Straightforward people are sometimes better because they don't care.
But we also need to understand that sometimes our directness does not necessarily make others like, and may even hurt others.
For example, if we feel that someone's cat-like cat is not in line with our aesthetics, we will directly comment on their appearance, which is a naked injury to others.
Sometimes a direct way of expressing it does promote the efficiency of communication between the two, but sometimes learning to express it in a different way will have a better effect.
Therefore, we should not be too direct in doing things, we must leave a way out for ourselves, do not let ourselves fall into an embarrassing situation, and do not let others be hurt unnecessarily.