Unsatisfactory things in life, ** out of ten. Everyone has problems, and there are many people who can't solve them in a lifetime. We are trapped in our respective cages.
Low self-esteem, cowardice, social fear, anxiety, obesity, insomnia, etc., have you ever secretly cried and resented your incompetence in the dark night?
If yes, today's book "Micro Actions: Solving 99% of Life's Problems with 1% Small Actions" is very suitable for you to read.
Because the author Bill O'Hanlon has also experienced the struggle of depression and despair, she is a British national psychological counselor, and it is because of empathy that she finally found a "solution-oriented**" suitable for every ordinary person, and at the same time help more friends who are in the quagmire.
The so-called "solution-oriented**" is to solve the problem, no longer to find the root cause, but simply and rudely directly use action to change life. That is, to use "micro-actions" to advance the progress of things bit by bit.
The essence of solution-oriented**: find what people can do, and what they've done before, and then ask them to deliberately do things that work for them to alleviate or solve the problem.
Think about what you do to make yourself happy when you're unhappy or depressed? Shopping, watching movies, reading books, going to restaurants, whatever it is, as long as it has had a relieving effect on your negative emotions, then do it.
In the book, Bill thoughtfully gives 10 keys to solution-oriented**, 33 action suggestions, and uses more than 90 real stories to help you understand and apply.
When you find yourself in a difficult situation, try Bill's Micro Actions**
Start by finding the smallest changes you can implement and stick to.
Second, change the way you do things, such as actions, interactions, and language.
Or change the way you look at things, like your focus, your understanding.
Or change the context, time, place, etc. where the problem arises.
When this small action works, the iceberg inside you is slowly dissolving.
For example, when tutoring children with homework, mothers are prone to break down, then use harsh words or even scold their children, and then regret and blame themselves. Swear not to do it again every time, but repeat it next time.
At this point, "micro-actions" can be applied to solve the problem. Don't analyze the cause, don't blame yourself, and act directly. First of all, when the child is doing homework, the mother uses the trivial matter of reading to divert attention; secondly, change the focus on the child, not on today's mistakes, but on today's outstanding performance; Change the space again, the mother is in the living room, and the child is in the study, reducing the chance of close contact.
Such a change is not difficult to implement, but the effect is immediate. Because that's what I'm doing now, and I'm also a beneficiary of "solution-oriented**" unintentionally, so let's learn it quickly.
Think less and do more, the world is wide!
The text is original, ** real shot.