Year of the Dragon 10,000 yuan punch card plan
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Let's talk about what relaxation is! Let's start with a little story.
A simple post on Weibo resonated with hundreds of thousands of people.
Here's the thing.
Netizen Black Cat White Socks was shocked by a family during a flight, the family could not board the plane due to the expiration of the child's ID when they traveled, the child's mother took the child home, and the others continued to travel. However, because they forgot that their luggage was in the mother's name, all their luggage was returned. In most cases, the family will definitely blame each other and lose their temper, but the family is very peaceful, just beating the ** and asking people to pick up the luggage and send it again.
The whole process was not angry, there was no quarrel, it was very daily....Solved.
Netizens said that they were too envious of this family, and if they were that mother, they would definitely be scolded as a sieve; If you are someone else whose luggage is returned, you must be angry, but you will never solve it as a trivial matter.
The reason why this family is envied by most netizens is because they live with a sense of relaxation, and this sense of relaxation is so rare.
Relaxation is a state of tranquility when there is a big event!
People with a sense of relaxation, they have a high tolerance for mistakes, they are calm, they only solve problems, but they don't vent their emotions first. Tarzan can deal with it calmly before the collapse!
This kind of person is emotionally stable, flexible and not harsh, and will be very relaxed with him, especially liked. They also tend to be more successful in school, work, and life.
People who do not have a sense of relaxation will be full of fear of making mistakes, not confident, always in a tense and anxious state, and will easily break down emotionally when they encounter setbacks, yelling, will not solve problems, and life is not easy to be happy.
So how do you raise a child with a sense of relaxation?
Allow your child to make mistakes
As children grow up, mistakes are inevitable.
For example, when a bowl is accidentally broken during a meal, I often see that parents immediately burst into a rage, accusing and abusing their children, and even punching and kicking their children, as if they are not facing their own children, but their own enemies.
Some netizens shared a story.
When he was a child, he accidentally lost his bus card, and his mother scolded him on the street for half an hour. Originally, the family was happily shopping, but now there is no interest, and everyone is in a state of anxiety. Seeing his mother's thunderous state, I can't wait to sentence him to relieve my hatred. But in fact, you can directly reissue a card and spend 5 yuan to solve the problem. Besides, the card has been lost, isn't the first step to solve the problem?
What the child learns from his mother is not how to solve problems when they encounter problems, but how to get angry when they encounter problems, accusing the party who made the mistake.
Because he grew up in an environment with a low tolerance for making mistakes, he has a strong sense of shame and panic about "doing something wrong". Once he finds out that he has done something wrong, he will first try his best to hide it, and if he can't hide it, he will desperately shirk his responsibility!
Therefore, allowing children to make mistakes and allowing "accidental" things to happen is the first step in raising a child with a sense of relaxation.
Encourage your child to do it again
I've seen a touching little story abroad before.
A 6-year-old boy went to the fridge to get milk because he was thirsty, but his hand slipped and the milk fell to the ground. His mother came over when she heard the noise, and without the expected accusations and criticisms, she just asked him to clean the ground with a rag. When it was done, Mom said, "Now you go get the milk again." The little boy went to get the milk again, and this time, it didn't spill.
What this child learned from his mother is that it is not terrible to encounter problems, solve the trouble first, and then try again, and he can do it well.
This is the second step in raising a child with a sense of relaxation.
Learn to say, it's okay
If you work hard, but you can't do it, no matter how much it should be and how correct it is, you must learn to tell your child that it's okay.
A netizen shared a small story.
A final exam in her middle school. Before the exam, she had been carefully reviewing for a long time, and she did well in every mock test. Unexpectedly, after the final exam paper was sent, she found that she couldn't understand the last question at all. In her usual revision and daily study, she has never seen this type of question, so she really can't do it. As you can imagine, she didn't do well in the exam.
But my mother said that there must be a reason why you didn't do well in the exam. The mother did not accuse, but accepted it very relaxedly. She no longer has a strong psychological burden, nor does she fall into endless self-blame, but quickly adjusts her state and focuses on a new round of learning.
Since then, she has a very peaceful mentality every time she takes the exam, and she is not so nervous that she can't sleep like others, but she performs exceptionally and enters a good 985 college.
In fact, in this life, except for life and death, everything else is trivial. As long as people are around, the future has infinite possibilities. Sometimes the more anxious and nervous you are, the worse you will be doing things anyway, so teach your child to relax and accept the results calmly after working hard, and sometimes there may be unexpected gains.
After all, all roads lead to Rome, and the east is not bright and the west is bright!
I often envy young people who are comfortable in important situations, or who can be calm and quickly find solutions to problems when encountering major events. In fact, it is because their growth environment gives him more opportunities for trial and error, allows them to make mistakes, allows them to try, so that they find the right way to deal with the world earlier.
The sense of relaxation is not innate, it is exercised in being tolerated and allowed again and again.
Therefore, in order for your children to be able to become such relaxed people in the future, to be excellent and happy, you might as well allow them to make mistakes, encourage them to do it again, and accept the results calmly with them if they can't do it.
Parents love their children to have far-reaching plans, hoping that our children can have a sense of relaxation, excellent and happy life!
What do you think about this, please leave a message in the comment area.
The next issue will be more exciting!