First of all, let me ask a question, it seems that there is a cooling-off period for divorce now, how long is the cooling-off period in various places?
When we mention the word "divorce", we may mistake it for a modern concept, but it is not. In fact, "divorce" is a time-honored word that does not originate from the West or foreign cultures, but from our ancient Chinese culture. According to historical records, the earliest written records can be traced back to the Tang Dynasty, to be precise, from the book "Jin Shu Criminal Law Chronicles" compiled by Fang Xuanling in the Tang Dynasty. This shows that during the Jin Dynasty in China, the term that we now commonly use in the laws of various countries has clearly appeared in the national laws.
In the past, it was generally believed that women in ancient times followed norms such as the Three Obediences and Four Virtues, but in fact, these ideas were gradually formed after the Song Dynasty. From the Western Zhou Dynasty to the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, the foundation of the patriarchal family was not stable, and the concept at that time was that "the way of husband and wife, if there is righteousness, there is harmony, and if there is no difference, there is no difference". Under the guidance of such a concept, the existence of the marriage relationship is like a siege, with free advance and retreat, relatively arbitrary.
After Qin Shi Huang unified the six kingdoms, he issued a marriage decree to stabilize the family, the basic unit of society, and ensure the rule of the empire. The decree stipulates that the dissolution of a marriage must be registered by the government, otherwise it constitutes the crime of "abandoning the wife without a letter", and both men and women are punished. The woman will be "punished" after fornicating with others**, and at the same time need to build a city wall. This decree laid the foundation for the marriage system in later generations and reduced the social problems of the time.
When it comes to the types and causes of divorce, there are really many kinds of divorces. But in ancient times, divorce was also said differently according to different circumstances and legal provisions. First of all, there is a kind of so-called "righteousness", that is, if one of the spouses beats, abuses, injures or even kills the other party's relatives, this is a heinous crime and must be forced to divorce.
In addition to "righteousness", there is also a kind called "harmony". The premise of this type of divorce is that both spouses agree to the divorce. It may sound very humane, but in fact, in ancient patriarchal societies, women were often in a weak position, so they were not allowed to file for divorce. In this way, "reconciliation" is often proposed by the man, and the woman only passively accepts.
Finally, there is another kind of "divorce" or "divorce" that everyone often sees in TV dramas. This situation usually refers to a unilateral forced divorce by a husband from his wife. For example, in the Song Dynasty, the husband could divorce his wife for seven reasons, the most common of which were "disobedience to parents" and "inability to have children".
In addition to personal emotional factors, family trivialities can also be the trigger for divorce.
For example, Bao Yong, Liu Xiu's minister, considered it disrespectful and abandoned his wife just because he scolded the family dog in front of his mother. This overemphasis on family rules reflected the importance that society attached to family order at that time.
Li Chong, a minister in the Eastern Han Dynasty, seemed to have a more common reason for his divorce. His wife privately told him that the family had private property and hoped to divide the property, but Li Chong angrily refused. In ancient societies, women's property rights were restricted, and Li Chong's response was a reflection of this social concept.
Cui Hao, a famous poet of the Tang Dynasty in history, also attracted attention for his marriage experience. Although he was talented and wrote the popular poem "Yellow Crane Tower", in real life, he divorced many times due to unsatisfactory marriages. His character was therefore questioned.
The notion previously stated should not be mistaken for the idea that in ancient times, men were free to terminate marriages by virtue of the supremacy of their husbands. In fact, in ancient times, the divorce of husband and wife was not only restricted by the law, but also had to follow the family etiquette and bear reasonable judgment.
To give an example, the Book of the Later Han Dynasty records such a true story: at that time, there was a negative man named Huang Yun, who was a famous scholar in the Eastern Han Dynasty, and his talent was praised by the local Taishou Yuan Kui. Yuan Kui said: "It is enough to have a son-in-law like Huang Yun. When Huang Yun heard this, he was overjoyed, and when he went home, he drafted a letter of resignation, wanting to divorce his wife Xiahou. Xiahou pleaded with her husband many times to no avail, and finally told her mother-in-law one day that since her husband had been treating her well, she was about to leave the Huang family tomorrow, and she was reluctant to hold a divorce ceremony. She wants to pour out her heartfelt songs in front of her guests.
The mother-in-law sympathized with Xiahou and agreed to his request. On the day of the divorce ceremony, more than 200 relatives and friends in the neighborhood were present. Just as everyone was preparing to eat, Xiahou exposed Huang Yun's various unsightly behaviors in public and denounced his unkindness. She said that she couldn't bear it anymore and dismissed Huang Yun in public. After speaking, he boarded the car and left, leaving Huang Yun dumbfounded.
Since then, this talented man has been discredited, and Taishou also felt ashamed, canceling his daughter's marriage contract with Huang Yun. Huang Yun returned empty-handed. It must be known that this incident happened in the Han Dynasty, although there were few women like Xiahou who dared to leave their husbands, but she undoubtedly gave a bad breath to ancient women.
However, as for the origin of the word "divorce", the history books do not give an exact time. But what we can be sure of is that since the emergence of the marriage and family system in human society, it must have been accompanied by the phenomenon of divorce and the corresponding legal system. From the ancient marriage system to the modern concept of marriage, the phenomenon of divorce has always existed, and it is not only the result of personal choice, but also the product of social civilization and progress.
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