As we grow up, we are often told that maturity is the only way to success.
However, maturity is not simply a precipitation of years, it is a profound change in self-awareness and attitude towards life.
Many people associate maturity with age and physical maturity, but true maturity is an inner awakening, a state of balance and harmony that a person gradually forms after experiencing the ups and downs of life.
This state is not only reflected in the insight into the outside world, but also in the deep understanding of the inner world. Truly mature people know how to find their place in the complex world and how to find peace in the hustle and bustle of their hearts.
They often have the following five significant characteristics: good at managing health, having a sense of anti-risk, letting go of obsessions, eliminating emotional internal friction, and accepting ordinary.
01.Good at managing health
Health is a topic that people often discuss, and it is also an issue that often bothers people. If a person wants to have a happy life, then he must ensure his health, just like eating hot pot needs chopsticks, without chopsticks, no matter how delicious the hot pot is, it is difficult to start.
From the perspective of the body, the human body is like a delicate ecosystem, and the cells are the industrious workers in this system, and they perform their tasks in silence until they are exhausted. In this seemingly orderly microcosm, crises occur from time to time. Cells can mutate, or die prematurely under excessive stress, often because we neglect our own health. Just as honey and water coexist in harmony, it is because they respect each other and do not interfere with each other.
The same is true of our bodies, when bad habits invade, innocent cells are damaged, and those cells responsible for defending against external aggression are sacrificed by overwork. After the war, the entire body system has to not only clean up the battlefield, but also take care of those cells that are still holding their posts, which is undoubtedly a huge test of vitality. Therefore, as the masters of this organism, it is our duty to support the work of the cells: to activate their vitality through movement; Make sure they get enough energy by eating a balanced diet; Lighten their burden by getting rid of bad habits.
Look at health from a psychological point of view. It is not only the body that needs to be healthy, but also the mind. Human beings are emotional animals, and it is inevitable to be affected by external objects, and our psychology is like a spring, if it is sometimes elongated, sometimes shortened, and over time, it will become a defective product. Therefore, if you want to have a healthy body and mind, you must be as calm as the surface of the lake, as peaceful as the bottom of the sea, know how to regulate yourself, enlarge your horizons, and the joys, sorrows, and sorrows around you are a variation of life, and the existence is reasonable. Joys and sorrows, we just need to look at it like Su Shi, a big poet"When I returned, there was no rain or shine
Health is the capital of life, and to ensure health, we must start from two aspectsJust as the blue sky needs to be embellished with white clouds, which rely on the nourishment of water droplets and ice crystals, physical and mental health also need to be carefully cared for and balanced.
02.Be risk-aware
Elena Ferrante writes in the book "The Story of a New Name": ".Everything in this world is life and death, full of risks, and those who do not accept risks, those who do not understand fate, are declining day by day in the corner. ”
People with a sense of anti-risk can not only identify potential risks, but also find opportunities in risks. They know that every failure is a necessary path to success, and every challenge is an opportunity for self-improvement. They learned how to balance risks, how to plan in uncertainty, and how to find turnaround in crises.
Such people have an optimistic attitude towards life. They do not passively wait for their fate to be arranged, but actively shape their own destiny. Only by constantly learning and adapting can we enhance our ability to resist risks, whether it is in career development, financial management or personal life, we can flexibly respond to various unexpected situations. They know that only by constantly challenging themselves can they gain a firm foothold in the changing world and find their own place in an environment where risks and opportunities coexist.
Anti-risk awareness is a kind of wisdom of life and a commitment to the future. It teaches us not only to have courage but also to be strategic in the face of the unknown.
Let go of obsessions
Kazuo Inamori once said: ".can't get out of their own obsessions, and they are all prisoners to **. "Life is a passerby, why bother with thousands of knots.
So, let go of obsessions and burdens, what exactly does it bring us? From a practical point of view, letting go of obsession is to learn to stop unnecessary insistence at the right time and avoid going further and further down the wrong path, thus avoiding unnecessary pain and loss.
Let go of obsessions, make everything we suffer moderate and reasonable, and finally retain a healthy soul with curiosity, and a pair of eyes that are always alive and constantly peeking out into the beauty of the world.
Moreover, letting go of attachments allows us to follow our nature, refine our hearts, and sublimate our souls to higher heights. Confucius has "four sons": don't will, don't must, don't be solid, don't me. "Will" and "must" are "solid", and "solid" is essentially an obsession, and this obsession is undoubtedly due to the narrowness of "me" and the development of "me" caused by the extreme.
If we keep looking along the single mirror tube of "I", we will inevitably become prisoners of Plato's cave who ignore the sea of stars overhead. If we don't have obsession, we will no longer be entangled in the sacrifices made after moths put out the fire, and we will no longer be trapped in the "panoramic prison" cast by "me".Where is life not happy"That's it.
Eliminate emotional friction
"Emotional internal friction", as the name suggests, is a state of self-consumption of emotions that leads to anxiety and depression. “A person cannot keep a poisonous snake in his chest forever；You cannot get up night and night and plant thorns in the garden of your soul. "Emotional friction is what Wilde called a poisonous snake and thorn, stabbing people's bodies and minds.
Caught in the whirlpool of emotional internal friction, people often chew on daytime words repeatedly in the dead of night, but it is difficult to find peace of mind. Do you choose to dwell on the regrets of the past, or bravely move into the future? Instead of letting self-blame become a shackle to the soul, we should look to a broader world: in this fast-paced era, how to avoid the erosion of emotional internal friction? How to maintain peace of mind in material pursuits? How do you regain your peace of mind after a heated argument?
To get rid of emotional internal friction, we must first learn self-awareness and reduce our craving for material things. The true way is to replace material desires with spiritual satisfaction, and not let inner turmoil affect emotional stability. If you place yourself in the wider universe, you will find that those seemingly important material treasures are just a speck of dust in the vast universe.
We should learn from Tao Yuanming."Picking chrysanthemums under the east fence, leisurely see the South MountainThe leisurely mentality, savoring the crown"Don't let people praise the color, just leave the air full of goodness"The independence of the high. In today's materialistic world, people are burning, like the wolf in Pu Songling's pen, after eating the leftover bones, they are eyeing new interests. The comparison mentality is like an undiagnosed cancer, and anxious people are unaware that they have fallen into the vortex of emotional internal friction. If we can reduce material desires, the smell of copper will no longer penetrate into the heart through the nasal cavity, and we can sigh for the beauty of life in the indifference.
Eliminate emotional friction, but also be tolerant and understanding. Many people grow up with the hope of growing up only to grow up later, often due to a reluctance to deal with interpersonal relationships. But escapism is not the answer. The big things should be solved face to face, never run away from facing them, no longer chase and fight hard about small things, and if the grievance is not enough to worry about, let it drift away with the wind. We may not be able to be like Wang Wei to be accompanied by bamboo forests under the moon, and it may be difficult for us to retreat to the mountains and forests like Meng Haoran.
For things that cannot be escaped, procrastination will eventually snowball loss, so we can only face the sophistication of human feelings. "One foot and one foot flattened the violet, but it left the fragrance on the heel", turning harm into benefit, turning enemies into friends, and also reaping forward momentum and achieving good stories.
05.Accept the ordinary and embrace a confident life
Man has to accept his ordinariness. Most of the world's people are ordinary people. Ordinary is a state and a cognition. There are not so many numerators present, and most of them are the denominator carrying the entire scaffold. Nephilim are the brightest of the stars when they shine; People try to get closer, but it is difficult to achieve becoming.
Ordinary is still a starting point. CCTV host Yang Lan studied hard in the face of the fact that he had an ordinary appearance, and was recognized by the outside world through the improvement of his hosting ability. In "Ordinary World", Lu Yao uses Sun Shaoping to express the true meaning of ordinary and non-mediocre life. Gu Youding is a small cattle solver, but he comprehends the "art of self-cultivation" in the improvement of his skills and realizes the brightness of the spiritual world. So we are ordinary, but we accept it, and we will still choose to move forward.
Self-confidence is the foundation for sticking to an ordinary life. The spiritual world should be based on self-confidence. As Pascal said, "Man is a deposed king", and no one but the king will grieve for the throne.
If you don't even believe in yourself, then no amount of encouragement and trust from others will help. Self-confidence works on oneself and comes from oneself. Yang Lan's self-confidence comes from his own professional technology, Sun Shaoping's self-confidence comes from his own independent thinking, and Ku Ding's self-confidence comes from his own cow-solving technology. They are going farther and farther on their own ordinary path, and they also gain self-confidence in the precipitation of time.
So we strive to move forward, take strength as the source of self-confidence, and anchor in our own ordinary sea. Learning to be confident is not blindly confident. In his talk show, Yang Li, with "ordinary but confident", talks about those groups who have a high self-awareness and comment on others in a condescending manner.
Those people just forgot their ordinary nature, and their self-confidence turned into arrogance. Newton saw his achievements as "standing on the shoulders of others." ** Attribute the victory of the Huaihai Battle to the "cart of the masses", without mentioning his own merits. Mo Yan didn't put on a shelf and founded WeChat*** to talk to young people, and humbly said that his calligraphy was graffiti.
Taking people as a mirror, the master does not forget the original intention of ordinary people. In the process of grasping self-confidence, we should always remember our own ordinariness and not lose ourselves. Self-confidence supports the ordinary, and the ordinary makes the self-confidence no longer lost. Therefore, an ordinary person should let self-confidence and ordinariness accompany the way forward, so that he can have the confidence to accept ordinary fate, and insist on embracing a confident life.
Maturity marks the transformation of a person's soul and the sublimation of the realm.
Those who are truly mature show deep wisdom and restrained richness.
They have witnessed the vastness of the world and experienced the diversity of the world.
They are not lost in worldly fame and fortune, they are not contemptuous of their ordinariness, and they are not swayed by emotional fluctuations.
May you remain calm in the midst of the storm and keep your peace of mind.
Keep an open mind, don't force, don't be impatient, don't get angry, so that your life path will be more stable and long-term.
Documenting real life