My mother-in-law beat me, my husband remained silent, and seven days later my mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital, and my husband fell to his knees and cried bitterly.
My name is Lin Ting, I am 30 years old, and I am the business manager of a foreign trade company. I am responsible for communicating with foreign customers, signing contracts, shipping, collecting payments, etc. My job is busy, but it's also fulfilling. I love my job and I love my life.
Three years ago, Xiaojie and I got married. He was an architect, and we met at a working meeting and fell in love at first sight. He is tall and handsome, talented, personable, and responsible. He was gentle and considerate to me, affectionate and righteous, loving and passionate. He is the prince charming in my mind, and I am the princess in his eyes.
Our marriage was opposed by both families because they felt that our personalities were incompatible, and we were both only children with no siblings to help take care of our parents. They say we're too young, too impulsive, too ignorant, too unrealistic. They say that our marriage will not be happy, it will not last, it will not be successful.
We stuck to our choice, moved to another city, and started a new life. We believe that with love, we can overcome all difficulties. We rented a small apartment, which was cosy and comfortable. We go out early and return late every day, working hard for our future. We cuddle each other and fall asleep every night, dreaming sweetly, for our happiness.
Last year, we welcomed our baby daughter. She is our heart and our burden. Because of her birth, we had to give up a lot of our original plans, such as traveling, changing houses, getting promoted, and so on. Our lives have become more stressful, more difficult, and more frustrating.
I didn't want to give up my career, so I hired a babysitter to help me with the kids. Xiaojie is also very supportive, he said that he will try his best to make money and let us live a better life. He said he didn't mind if I was better than him, he said he was proud of me, he said he gave everything for me.
However, instead of getting better, our lives have become more stressful. The nanny's salary, the child's milk powder, diapers, toys, clothes, etc., are all a lot of expenses. Our income is not low, but it is not enough for our expenses. We have more and more debts, we are under more and more pressure, and we are more and more conflicted.
We started fighting over money. Xiaojie thinks I'm spending too much money, and I think he makes too little money. He said I didn't know how to thrift, and I said he didn't know how to be aggressive. He said I didn't care about my family, I said he didn't care about himself. We both feel that the other person is inconsiderate and disrespectful.
Xiaojie's parents knew about our situation, so they often called ** to persuade us to go back to live, saying that they could help us take care of the children and save money for the nanny. I disagree, I feel like they are trying to interfere in our lives, and I don't want to leave my job and friends. I said that I had grown up, that I had my own choices, that I had my own opinions. I said I don't need their help, I don't need their worries, I don't need their sympathy.
Xiaojie felt that they were for our good, and he wanted to go back to live and reconcile with them. He said he didn't want to quarrel with me anymore and didn't want to see me unhappy anymore. He said he was willing to sacrifice his dreams for the sake of our family. He said he didn't care what other people thought, he only cared about my feelings, he only cared about our happiness.
I don't understand why he's doing this, I feel like he's giving up on our love and betraying our vows. I don't want to go back to live with him, I don't want to live with his parents, I don't want to lose my freedom and dignity. I said I wouldn't change for him, I said I wouldn't give up for him, I said I wouldn't compromise for him.
Our contradictions are getting deeper and deeper, and we have little in common, except for children. Our feelings are also getting weaker, and we have little intimacy except for sleeping. Our lives are also becoming more and more monotonous, and we have little fun other than watching TV. Our marriage is also becoming more and more fake, and we have little real affection except for superficial politeness.
One day, I found a text message from a strange woman on Xiaojie's phone, saying that she missed him very much and asked him when he would be able to meet. I was so angry that I asked him if he was having an affair. He did not admit it, saying that she was just a colleague and nothing. He said he was just communicating at work and didn't mean anything else. He said he didn't betray me, he didn't cheat on me, he didn't forget me.
I didn't believe him, I felt like he was lying to me. I decided to leave him, take the child, and go back to my parents. I don't think he loves me anymore, and I don't love him anymore. I don't think our marriage makes any sense anymore. I said I didn't want to waste time with him anymore, I said I didn't want to get tangled with him anymore, I said I didn't want to get along with him anymore.
Xiaojie was very sad, he said he didn't betray me, he said that the woman was just a friend, he said he still loved me, he said he didn't want to lose me and the child. He said he was willing to change for me and work hard for our family. He said he would cut ties with that woman, he said he would care more about me and the child, and he said he would make us happy again.
I can't listen to him, I think he's just talking, I think he's just making excuses, I think he's just stalling. I don't think he's the person I fell in love with anymore, and I don't think I know him anymore. I said I wouldn't trust him anymore, I said I wouldn't forgive him again, I said I wouldn't love him anymore.
I insisted on divorcing him, and I said I didn't want to do it again.
Divorced him, I said I didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore, I said I just wanted to give my children a happy home. I said I didn't need his sympathy, I said I didn't need his money, I said I didn't need his love.
Xiaojie reluctantly agreed to my request, he said that he respected my decision, he said that he wanted me to be happy, he said that he wanted the child to be healthy, and he said that he hoped that we could break up peacefully. He said he wouldn't bother me anymore, he said he wouldn't pester me anymore, he said he wouldn't hurt me anymore.
We signed a divorce agreement at the courthouse, we took our own things separately, we hugged the kids, and we said goodbye. We didn't shed tears, we didn't regret it, we didn't have nostalgia. This is how we ended our marriage and separated our lives like this.
I went back to my parents and they were happy, they said they always felt that Xiaojie was not suitable for me, they said they always felt that our marriage was a mistake, they said they always felt that I should leave him. They said they would always support me, always be there for me, and always love me.
I thank them for their understanding, for their help, and for their love. I feel like I've finally gotten rid of a heavy burden, I feel like I've finally regained a fresh start, and I feel like I can finally be myself again.
I got a new job, I made some new friends, I participated in some new activities. I try to forget the past, try to enjoy the present, and try to look forward to the future. I told myself that I was still young, that I still had a chance, that I still had hope.
I also try to be a good mother, I try to spend as much time with my children as possible, care about my children as much as possible, and educate my children as much as possible. I told her that she was my baby, that she was my angel, that she was my hope. I told her that she had a dad who loved her, she had a pair of grandparents who loved her, and she had a mom who loved her.
I also try to be a good daughter, I try to go home to see my parents as much as possible, listen to my parents as much as I can, and honor my parents as much as possible. I tell them that they are my roots, they are my bones, and they are my strength. I told them that I was grateful for their upbringing, that I respected their opinions, and that I loved their kindness.
I feel like I've come out of the shadows, I feel like I've found myself, I feel like I've rebuilt my confidence. I feel like I can start over, I feel like I can love again, I feel like I can be happy again.
Until one day, I met Xiaojie on the street. He looked emaciated, old, and tired. He said he missed me, he missed the kids, he missed us very much. He said that he never gave up on us, never forgot us, never stopped loving us.
He said he regretted not cherishing us, he said he regretted not understanding us, he said he regretted not keeping us. He said he missed out on our lives, on our growth, on our happiness.
He said he wanted to reconcile with me, remarry me, and reorganize his family with me. He said he had changed himself, had given up on the woman, had quit that job. He said he was ready for a fresh start, ready to love again, ready to be happy again.
I looked at him and I didn't know what to say, what to do, what to think. I had mixed emotions in my heart, an indescribable feeling, a confusion that I couldn't choose. I don't know if I still love him, I don't know if I still miss him, I don't know if I still need him.
I remembered our acquaintance, remembered our love, and remembered our stay. I think of our sweetness, of our warmth, of our happiness. I remembered our vows, remembered our dreams, remembered our hopes.
I also remembered our quarrels, our indifference, our hurts. I remembered our pain, our helplessness, our despair. I remembered our breakup, I remembered our divorce, I remembered our goodbye.
I don't know what I'm going to choose, I don't know how I'm going to answer, I don't know how I'm going to continue. All I know is that I have a daughter, I have a pair of parents, and I have a self. All I know is that I am responsible for them, I am responsible for them, I am happy for them.
I said to Xiaojie, I need time, I need space, I need to think. I said I couldn't easily promise him, I said I couldn't easily forgive him, I said I couldn't easily fall in love with him. I said I had to think about it, I said I had to make a good decision, I said I had to live well.
I turned away from him, and I took the child and went back to my home. I don't know if it's the right choice, I don't know if it's the last chance, I don't know if it's the best outcome. All I know is that this is my story, this is my life, this is my choice.