In the third year of marriage to my first boyfriend, I amputated my legs to save him.
But he just greeted his unharmed colleagues.
The first time he saw my prosthetic leg, he threw up all over me.
I couldn't dance anymore.
Then he knelt and begged me to atone for my sins.
I didn't cry and shoved the divorce agreement into his hand.
Thank you for letting me see you clearly, and I'm going to send you to jail. 」
When the truck came straight at us, my mind went blank.
I heard a lot of people screaming and screaming, and they told me to get out of the way.
I squeezed Fu Yanqiu's slightly cool hand and made the only movement I could think of.
Yanqiu! Get out of the way! 」
I jerked him to the side, and a heart-rending pain ensued.
When the world quieted down, I felt like I was on the verge of death because it hurt so much.
In a trance, I felt a light rain fall from the sky, sour, and flowing down my cheeks.
I don't know who hugged me tightly, and the heart-rending cry was very ugly.
It's really true enough to really love me.
I just think of it as Fu Yanqiu, with some pride and satisfaction.
I smiled and comforted: Fu Yanqiu, don't cry, you ...... cryIt's hard to hear......」
That was the last memory I had, and then I passed out.
I woke up again, and the pungent smell of disinfectant water filled my nasal cavities.
The ICU in the single room was so silent, and the ticking heartbeat monitor was deafening.
The effect of the sedative is gradually wearing, and the pain is pouring in.
The pain in my brain was like pins and needles, and the weight of a thousand pounds weighed on my legs.
I vaguely looked through the mask and saw the vicissitudes of life on the face of one.
His eyes are blue, his eyes are red and swollen, and his hair is like a bird's nest.
I recognized him and suddenly calmed down.
Shen Quchi? All I know about him is that he is a man with a lot of money and time.
For every performance, he was dressed up and sat in the center of a row.
Then throw a lot of valuable things onto the stage.
No one dared to accept such a gift, so I returned it to him every time.
The two of them exchanged names after going back and forth, but that's all.
I have some doubts, why is he the one who is accompanying me?
How about you, Yanqiu? 」
But at the moment, I don't want to pay attention to the big patrons of our company.
I ignored the mess of tubes on my body, propped myself up, and craned my neck as best I could to look out, I couldn't wait to see my boyfriend.
I think he was waiting for me outside the door.
Shen Quchi was at a loss in the face of my question.
For the first time, I saw the tangled in his sly face.
He didn't seem to know what to say, and opened and closed his mouth several times. With his hands folded in front of him, he lowered his head like a child making a mistake.
But sincerity forced him to look me in the eye.
He's gone to hand you in. 」
He scrambled to explain, his voice rubbing hoarse like sandpaper.
Don't lie to me, I think I know.
I was not in the mood to listen to his quibbles and interrupted him directly.
Without hesitation, I quietly lay back on my bed and quietly looked out the window at the sky.
In an instant, mixed emotions welled up in my heart, bitterness and silence filled my entire heart.
I silently touched the cold hard cast on my arm.
His arm was also cracked and in a cast.
I am not disappointed by this result, but somewhat expected.
Every time Fu Yanqiu came to pick me up after rehearsal, how could I not notice the gaze he projected on another girl?
As a girl, how could I not perceive the inexplicable hostility exuded by a kind girl?
Thousands of moments that have long been aware of are all brightened up at this moment.
I've never been so calm about all the details.
I'm a little annoyed and want to place an eviction order.
But Shen Quchi refused to leave, and inexplicably he began to sob.
He was such a good-looking person, and his cry was like a whimpering young beast, so bad that my temples were pounding, and I just wanted to stop him.
I heard him tell me in a trembling voice that I might not be able to dance in the future.
I started acting in ballet when I was eighteen years old, and it's been eight years now.
When I was a student, I was a big figure in school.
With beautiful appearance, excellent grades, and the aura of a star dancer, the whole school of flamboyant boys has accosted me.
I was dismissive of them, fancy and frivolous, with an empty mouth and no action.
Only Fu Yanqiu is different.
He was very clumsy in complimenting me on my good looks, explaining the daily chance encounters with lame reasons.
His major has nothing to do with me, but he has the cheekiness to skip classes every time.
He would cook early, wait for me to come and eat after class, and then clumsily tell me jokes.
He stumbled into my life and carefully held me in the palm of his hand.
I promised him.
Two people are sweetly in love and sweetly get a certificate.
The wedding banquet was very grand and dreamy, it was what I had imagined in my dreams.
I thought I would be so happy for the rest of my life and never change.
Fu Yanqiu said that he likes to watch me dance, so I am ready to dance on the stage for the rest of my life.
The Nutcracker is my favorite dance drama, and I put a lot of effort into playing Clara, setting up the stage and choosing the location for the tour.
Clara dances happily in a dreamscape like a bubble and finds her happiness.
Only now the bubble is bursting, and my dreams are shattered.
I recognized the reality.
I'm not his Clara, he's not my Nutcracker.
When did Fu Yanqiu change?
I lay peacefully on my hospital bed, silently thinking.
Fu Yanqiu sat beside him and carefully peeled apples for me.
I confided in him in a hoarse voice:
Yanqiu, I can't dance anymore. 」
Fu Yanqiu snorted, didn't care about the same, lowered his head and continued to peel his apple.
If it weren't for a soft "um", I would have thought he hadn't heard anything.
I felt a pang in my heart, and I choked up, looked into his eyes again, and repeated firmly:
Yanqiu, listen to me, I can't dance. 」
I was serious, so serious that I breathed a little quickly.
I tried my best to get more of a response from him, to have him pay more attention and worry to me because I had lost my legs, just as we had when we were in love.
Maybe I'm still his only one, I'm fantasizing.
But all my disappointment was in vain, and his tone was flat, as if it was just something unimportant that had happened.
He came up with a flat tone to coax a child:
I see, Yuzuqing, eat apples. 」
I wanted to say something more, but Fu Yanqiu pushed me back to the bed with some impatience.
Nothing can be changed, Lin Yuqing! Don't make a fuss, your leg hurts, and the saddest person is me. Your current state stresses me out! He suddenly raised his voice and spoke to me like a child.
I am the disobedient whom he reprimanded with harsh words.
But why am I disobedient?
I sacrificed my dancing career to save him, and even lost my legs, I just wanted to pour out my emotions and seek his concern, did this also become vexatious?
I couldn't hold back the tears for a long time, I buried my face in the palm of my hand, crying a handful of tears and snot.
I asked him with a crying voice, the moment I pushed him away, were you worried about my comfort, or were you happy that Xu Ruoxi didn't have an accident?
You've just been stylized with our eight years of life, and you've never sincerely wished me well. 」
I'm treating you with all my heart, why are you doing this to me? 」
Fu Yansheng was stung by my words and stared up at me sharply.
I knew him so well that when he watched me cry, the muscles in his neck and arms tensed so much that I could hear the sound of skeletal tendons rubbing.
He probably wanted to struggle.
Is this man, who has always been full of confidence, still thinking that I am just testing him? Or do you think I'm so innocent that I can't detect his betrayal?
When Xu Ruoxi's name was mentioned, the man who was usually as proud as a peacock instantly became like a deflated ball, and the whole person withered. His cowardice and hypocrisy were exposed at this moment, and I couldn't help but sneer.
For the first time, I couldn't see his expression clearly, and I couldn't understand why there was bitterness on his face in this situation. It's obvious that they've already split their legs, so why do you have to pretend to be affectionate disgustingly?
From being hit to the present, I have been very calm in the face of general anesthesia surgery and bone marrow puncture, and I have endured it without crying.
Now I finally shed tears in front of him, and my whole body convulsed.
The eight-year relationship is like a building block that has been put up, and if you draw one from it every day, it has long been crumbling.
Now it's finally falling apart.
My youth, my future, what kind of person I have entrusted to.
I laughed at my naivety, but it was normal at the time.
The fingertips of the pinched fingers turned white, and the two of them were silent for a while.
I didn't show any reluctance and nostalgia for this relationship and this man, I wiped my tears:
Let's go, go find Xu Ruoxi. I know that you love him more, and you don't love me anymore. 」
I'm getting better and I'm ready to start training.
The Nutcracker's provincial tour came to an end for the time being, and the whole crew came to see me in batches.
Xu Ruoxi was dressed up in flowers and branches, standing in front of my hospital bed.
The hem of her slim-fitting trench coat hung down beside her straight calves, and her bright red Gauguin shoes accentuated her white and slender legs.
may be to anger me, in the autumn day, she also deliberately wore a pair of hot pants to show off her good-looking figure.
The sound of the stiletto heel of a high heel tapping on the tile is crisp, but it is still extremely disturbing.
I've been seeing a psychiatrist for a month, but I can't pretend I don't care about my legs.
How could I not care?
If it weren't for that car accident, I would have been dancing The Nutcracker on stage by now.
If it weren't for that car accident, I would still be that talented ballet girl, and I would still be the principal of the Chinese Ballet.
I should be the heroine of choice for all ballets, not an alternate.
What else can I do now?
With a haggard face and dry hair, compared to the glamorous Xu Ruoxi, I look like a clown.
Perhaps from now on, no one will remember my glorious moments on the stage, that radiant appearance.
I was so embarrassed that I wanted to shrink into the covers.
Colleagues chatted and laughed, chatting about what interesting stories happened during this tour.
They used to affectionately call me Sister Yuzu, but now they look at me with pity.
I turned my head to them and pretended I wasn't interested.
They praised Xu Ruoxi's outstanding performance this time, and then suddenly fell silent like some kind of taboo.
Everyone in the ballet company wants to climb up when they break their heads, and without me as an eyesore principal, they may all be secretly happy behind their backs, I thought silently.
After a few pleasantries, they were leaving.
I called out to Xu Ruoxi.
Xiaoxi, there are still a lot of points to note in "The Nutcracker", you stay, I'll talk to you about it. 」
In the open.