Qiming Project When the child grows up, everything changes.
They are no longer well-behaved and obedient, but like a hedgehog, with thorns all the time, a word, a look, and a movement may make them thunderous.
Hedgehog-like children no longer regard their parents as heroes, and will even worry about marrying a neurotic woman like their mother, and will worry about finding a man who is as powerless as their father.
Complaining and blaming became their way of doing things, and parents suspected that they had given birth to the wrong child.
In fact, all the contradictions are ultimately the problems of the relationship.
The relationship is not good, everything is in the water. The relationship is more important than everything, and when the relationship is good, children will be willing to open their hearts to their parents.
If you want a good relationship, wise parents will adapt to their children's changes.
01.Learn to understand your child.
A child's growth is accompanied by problems, and children without problems do not exist.
Faced with children's problems, we parents can't help but get angry, often feeling that "there is something wrong with the child, it's too bad it shouldn't happen, my child shouldn't be like this." ”
Wise parents will feel that this is an opportunity for their children and themselves to grow, and that some of the so-called "problems" of the children are normal, or there are some reasons, so they should accept the child's behavior first, find the reasons, help the child grow and progress, and the child will get better.
You understand the child, the child does not need to bother to make up lies, does not need to be afraid of being exposed, how can he alienate you?
02.Let go of obsessions.
Teacher Pooh, an expert in family education, said: The biggest obstacle to family education is that parents are too persistent, too much attachment, which brings troubles to children and grows the root of children's problems.
For example, some parents are obsessed with their children's living habits, and if their children do not eat and bathe on time, they will go online, magnify the consequences of things, and have conflicts with their children.
For example, some parents are obsessed with changing their children, demanding that their children excel immediately and solve problems immediately. In fact, it takes time for children to grow, and it is normal to have repetitions.
Education is not overnight, it takes time and patience, and our parents can let go of too much attachment before their hearts can calm down. When the mind is calm and the internal friction is less, the child will work hard, and the result may be better.
03.Learn to communicate.
Communication is the magic weapon for problem solving. Many times, parent-child conflicts are caused by poor communication.
Many of our parents lack communication skills, blindly chatter, and the child is bored inside, so they will yell at you, close the door and lock the door, afraid of hearing you.
If you want to communicate with your child, parents need to let go of the idea of finding their child's problems and correcting their children's problems, first let go of their own thoughts, listen to what their children say, and then put forward their own opinions in a timely manner, so that the children can really be willing to trust you.
If parents are in a hurry to influence their children, ignore what their children say or rush to deny their children's ideas, children feel "panicked" and will slowly become too lazy to communicate with you.
Parents know how to communicate, and children will treat you as their own. Parents will not communicate, and the parent-child relationship will be minimized.
Improving the parent-child relationship starts with learning to communicate.
04.Write at the end.
Being a parent is really not easy.
Although it is challenging, the process of educating children is a process of cultivating themselves.
Wise parents know how to adapt to the changes of their children, try to go into the hearts of their children, understand their children, conform to their children, you do it right, the parent-child relationship will be good, and the children will naturally show a positive side, and they are more willing to cooperate than before.
May every parent learn to follow the thinking, accompany their children to grow up, and reap the fruits of education.