Is the fear of communicating with people in life shy or unconfident?

Mondo Psychological Updated on 2024-03-04

Usually we think that we don't like to talk, don't like social situations, are afraid to greet people, etc., because we are introverted, shy or not confident enough, in fact, what you think is "shy" may be social phobia!

Social phobia is a subtype of phobia. Patients are afraid of appearing in social situations, afraid of being watched by others in front of the public, afraid of making a fool of themselves in public, so they dare not speak or write in front of others, and in severe cases, they may have red face, red ears, sweating, heartbeat, palpitation, tremor, vomiting, dizziness, etc.

Shy, introverted or socially phobic?

First of all, introversion and shyness should not be confused with social phobia. As a simple example, shy and introverted people feel comfortable being alone, and that's what they want to be. For people with social phobia, this is just a last resort option to reduce their inner anxiety.

Shyness, shyness, and introversion are not the same as social phobia! Shyness is an innate type of temperament, also known as "social silence", in which these people usually remain silent when socializing. The key is that shy people will not feel significantly dissatisfied with this state and can adapt well to the social environment of work and life. However, people with social phobia will be overly anxious, very afraid of negative evaluations, and will feel scared and anxious in almost all social places, and will have serious mental and psychological problems in the long run.

Is there a way to overcome social phobia?

1) Accept and trust yourself. Social phobia is, to some extent, a manifestation of an inability to accept oneself. From now on, stop being critical, criticizing, blaming yourself, and don't run away with fear. You know, if you don't trust yourself, then who else in this world will trust you?

2) Don't deliberately cater to it. It is not advisable to suppress oneself and pander to others and the outside world. On the one hand, this way makes the other party unable to know the real us, and on the other hand, it will also bring a lot of psychological pressure to yourself and make yourself reject social activities.

3) Rehearse social scenarios on your own. To overcome fear is to overcome fear, and often rehearsing it in your own mind, the more often you have it, which is conducive to overcoming fear.

4) Choose friendly people to socialize with. People tend to build social confidence with friendly people because they are more approachable and know how to respect someone.

5) Focus on the social interaction itself, not your own performance. Shifting your attention to how to express yourself clearly and clearly, how to tap into the strengths of the other person, etc., will be much more calm.

6) Try to look into other people's eyes and speak. The eyes are the windows of the human soul, and if you can have the courage to look directly into the eyes of others, it is equivalent to daring to open your heart and communicate with others. At first, it can feel awkward to keep staring into someone's eyes, but when we can give ourselves some psychological cues, such as: even if I look into his eyes, he won't bite me. Or maybe it's a little game of my own: I just stare at him and see how he reacts.

7) Give yourself something to do. Psychologists believe that having empty hands can increase social fear, and holding something in your hand can give you a sense of security.

8) Proper relaxation. Doing so will ease the fear in your mind. Stand on your feet steadily, gently stand on your toes for a few seconds, and then lower them, while counting while taking deep, rhythmic breaths, doing two to three sets of thirty reps will generally relieve psychological fear.

Studies have shown that spontaneous remission of social phobia disorder is unlikely, with less than 1 in 4 patients relieving with age. In the absence of grooming and **, social phobia can last for years or even decades. If the condition is severe and you are unable to self-regulate, please seek medical treatment from a professional psychiatrist as soon as possible to get rid of social phobia.

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