"The first batch of "Dinks" reflected on their later years, do you regret having no children in your life?! "！
What does it feel like to be childless? The first batch in China"Dink"Entering their old age, how are they now? Do they regret it?
Some time ago, there was a hot topic where a niece interviewed her 54-year-old uncles and asked them some thought-provoking questions.
The first question my niece asked was: Do you regret choosing to be part of the Dink family from now on?
In response to this question, the aunt bluntly said that she had no regrets, while the uncle was slow to express any regrets. When asked about the future of pension, the aunt bluntly said that she would live in a nursing home, but the uncle did not choose to remain silent.
At the end of the **, the daughter asked her uncles to give some advice to young people who chose to be Dink, and the uncle said earnestly: they should get married and have children at the right age.
From his grandfather's side, when he heard his son's repentance, he couldn't hold his breath, and he said enthusiastically: At the beginning, how many people persuaded you to have children, but you didn't listen, and even my grandson was born late.
After Wenwen's father watched this shocking **, he thought of his sister-in-law, who chose Danish when she was young and was opposed by the whole family, but the attitude of the sister-in-law and her husband was very resolute.
Although the mother-in-law persuaded the sister-in-law to have a child when she was young and capable, lest she be too old to have a child when she wanted to, it was useless to regret it.
In the face of her mother-in-law's persuasion, the sister-in-law and the sister-in-law's husband came together and said bluntly: Dink is our choice, and the consequences are borne by us, please respect our decision.
I never thought that two people who were so determined would divorce after 10 years because of the problem of having children. The reason why they didn't want children in the first place was simple: they wanted to spend their time, energy, and money on children while they were young, and they didn't have the confidence to bring them up well after seeing all kinds of children.
On top of that, my sister-in-law was afraid of pain, scared of childbirth, and very assertive, slightly stubborn, with little to do to change her decision. Her most classic sentence is:"I didn't come into this world to inherit my family's business, but to experience life"。Therefore, whenever she meets relatives who insist that she have children, she has reason not to like her.
As she grew older, the relationship between the sister-in-law and her sister-in-law's husband gradually flattened. Seeing that family, friends, and colleagues all have children, but their own family is deserted, the sister-in-law's husband also begins to be a little envious, often expressing it by implying that the sister-in-law has children.
But the sister-in-law insisted on not having children, and the conflict between the two intensified, and finally ended in divorce. Less than a year after the divorce, the sister-in-law's husband remarried, and the following year, he became a father as he wished. The sister-in-law was not depressed because of the divorce, but continued to wander the world and enjoy life.
Wenwen's father had asked his sister-in-law to make Dink your mutual choice, and in the end, her husband broke his promise and chose to divorce.
The aunt said helplessly, blame him for something, people's hearts are fickle, he regrets having a child, so he wants to have a child. Since we are not on the same path, let's separate and live the life we want to live.
Have you ever envied families with children? Of course I envy them, but unfortunately, I can't have children right now, so I never recommend someone else to do a dink. For me, since I chose to be a dink, I had to enjoy my free time without children, learn what I wanted to learn, and go where I wanted to go.
Although my sister-in-law said it lightly, I could still see that she was more or less regretful about not having children.
Done"Dink"It is indeed a very difficult choice, especially after the age of 50, when people are old, have no children, have a successful career, and are not in good health, and when they encounter headaches and brain fever, there are no children around to help.
Many times, at this time, many people sighed that his father Wenwen saw that many people were over 50 years old, and the biggest support and spiritual pillar was actually children. Once, I took my mother to the hospital to see a doctor, and met an Aunt Ding, the record on the Internet is not very clear, my mother said that I took her to see a doctor, and the corners of her mouth went up.
is not only ordinary people, the famous host Kang Hui also revealed in his autobiography "Average Score" that his parents wanted to hold their grandson, but he chose Dink, and if they could do it again, they would have fulfilled their wish to be grandparents. In just one sentence, it can be seen that Kang Hui is more or less remorseful, and he still regrets that he chose Dink in the first place.
Wenwen's father checked China's fertility rate in recent years, and it can be said that it is getting lower and lower year by year, and now it has fallen below 10 million. Taking stock of the people I know around me, there are five couples who chose Dink, and they are all couples with high education level and high income, and everyone else refuses to have a second child.
Ask them why they don't want to have a child or a second child, and the answer is always the same: it's too hard to raise a child! In the words of a friend of mine, a child needs money for prenatal check-ups before birth, a confinement lady after the child is born, money for milk powder before the age of 3, money for early education for the ages of 3 to 5, money for interest classes at the age of 6 to 7, money for school selection and tuition before the child graduates, money for a down payment for a house, and money for a bride price or dowry when the child is older.
In fact, according to statistics, the cost of raising one child in China is between 620,000 and 1.98 million, and if you have two children, it is between 1.24 million and 3.96 million. This is indeed a significant expense for the average salaried class, and it will greatly reduce the standard of living and quality of life of both families.
Just like Sun Tao and Yan Ni joked in the sketch "Happiness is Actually Very Simple", the pressure of raising children is like launching a satellite, spending more than ten years of hard work, and ensuring the correctness of every link and data. Regularly or irregularly send weak signals, give some money, send money for satellites, eat well and dress well, and satellites emit weak signals: don't care, don't care. If you think about it, it's true, and that's what it's all about with kids.
In addition to the cost of raising a child, there is also the question of who will take care of the child after it is born. If a child is taken care of by parents after birth, they have worked hard all their lives and do not particularly want to take care of the child. If you ask a nanny to take care of it, the cost is too high; If you take care of yourself, the time you go to kindergarten will conflict with your working hours.
As my colleague Xiao Liu joked, the pressure is generally not great now, the old and the young, the left hand teaches the children homework, the right hand has to support four elderly people, and the shoulder has to bear the mortgage and car loan, and the key money is particularly difficult to earn. It seems that in addition to the desire to have children, even the desire to survive is very low.
Generally speaking, living in this era of increased pressure, it is easy to have a child, but it is difficult to raise a child, but if you choose Dink hastily, when you get old, your relatives around you are gone, and there are many people who regret it. Therefore, whether we want children or not, we must think clearly and figure it out!
Interactive topic, are there Dinks around? Do they have any regrets? Let us know in the last comment!
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