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Yanru, a classmate from Xiacheng District, Hangzhou, recounted: Since I was a child, I have a sister who is ten years older than me, she has an outgoing and cheerful personality since she was a child, and she knows how to please her parents. Later, when I grew up, a person with a personality like my sister has a strong ability to intersect and is better at dealing with people. Basically, she can meet a lot of friends in society, so if there is anything, you can help her, she came back to open the store and raised two daughters.
Now I'm unmarried and pregnant, I want to give birth, but she won't let me give birth, I don't think she's good for me, anyway, what he said is a denial of me, saying that I have no savings and no job, and the child is born to suffer, I listened to what he said, I felt her total denial of me, and I also felt that she was here with me, and I felt that I was more successful than me, which means that you are also worthy of having children, we can give the child good food and clothing, that is our ability, you can't even protect yourself, you are not worthy of being a mother, It seems that what she has is not allowed to be had, why should he stop my choice!
My child will not suffer with me in the future! It's not that the children in his family are suffering, what kind of mentality is this? You have children, you have the right to have children, others don't? Yes, that's right, I admit, as a sister! Surely you are better than me in some ways? I'm not as socially good as you outside, and my shortcomings are your strengths, so will you always stand on the commanding heights where you are right about everything and you are good at everything, and look down on others like this? Is there nothing that you are inferior to me? As soon as you come up to me, tell me that you are right and others are wrong! I'm really disgusted with communicating with her, it's really annoying.
Emotional answer: On the stage of the family, a pair of sisters with very different personalities are each writing their own chapter of life. The older sister has won more favor from her parents and a good life with her cheerful and outgoing and strong communication skills, while the younger sister has endured the pressure of being ignored and compared with her introverted personality. This family atmosphere from childhood left a deep imprint on the relationship between the two and created dramatic conflicts over life choices as adults.
When her younger sister, who was pregnant out of wedlock, decided to face it bravely and take on the responsibility of motherhood, she encountered strong opposition from her sister. My sister's words are like a sharp sword, pointing directly at the real problems of my sister's unstable economic situation and weak social skills, thinking that children will suffer when they are born. However, to my sister's ears, this is not only a question of the decision to have children, but also a complete denial of her personal worth and ability, and even reveals a sense of superiority that "you are not as good as me, so you don't deserve it".
My sister's attitude, which seems to be out of concern and worry, invisibly deepens my sister's frustration and inferiority complex. Her rhetoric seems to emphasize her role as a successful mother, as a measure of whether others have what it takes to be a good mother. This mentality not only reflects the sister's high recognition of her own achievements, but also exposes her intolerance and potential competition in the face of her sister's life choices.
From the perspective of emotional interpretation, the sister's behavior may stem from the deep attachment to her own success model and the expectation of others, and at the same time, it may also hide the fear or incomprehension of the different lifestyles that the sister shows. The disgust and pain of the younger sister are more due to the long-term crisis of self-worth and the desire for equality and respect.
It is true that everyone has the right to choose the lifestyle they want, including whether or not to become a mother. The merits of the older sister should not be the criterion for judging whether the younger sister can be a good mother. Although her younger sister is not as sociable and wealthy as her sister on the outside, her spiritual qualities of tenacity, independence and courage are also irreplaceable.
In this story full of contradictions and emotional collisions, we see the complex and delicate network of relationships between family members, as well as the struggle and growth of individuals in the pursuit of self-identity. It is important that everyone learns to understand and accept each other's uniqueness, let go of unnecessary comparisons, respect the choices of others, and make love and understanding the core strength that binds family relationships.