In the work "It's All Good", Su Mu Meilan has become a character who has been widely criticized: her strong behavior has led to Su Daqiang's lifelong weakness;criticized her concept of male superiority and inferiority, which caused Su Mingyu's childhood to lose warmth and joy, and also criticized her excessive pampering, which made Su Ming gradually grow into a "giant baby"...
It was precisely because of such accusations that all the efforts, sweat and hard work that Su Mu Meilan had put into the Su family finally came to naught.
Is Su Mu Meilan's condition really so unbearable?
No matter how much power Su's mother has in the Su family, her life is unsatisfactory. She and her husband have always had a bad relationship. The marriage was imposed on her by force.
The TV series "It's All Good" vividly depicts how an unhappy marriage can lead to a woman's emotional depletion.
Uncle Mingyu revealed that Su Daqiang couldn't find a suitable daughter-in-law in the city, so he came to the door many times to propose marriage, and also made a number of promises. His mother was a landlady, and in order to give her son a better living condition, she never gave up the cultivation of her son. Relying on a stable career and a city household registration, he successfully married Meilan, the most beautiful in the village at that time.
Meilan may not like this marriage very much, and she has the love of her own heart.
However, Meilan's mother forces her to find Gao Zhi'er, who has a household registration in the city, in order to ensure that her future children can leave the countryside and for Meilan's younger brother to benefit.
In the last century.
In the seventies and eighties, such marriages were not considered uncommon. At that time, most of the young people in the city obtained their favorite girls by "recruiting relatives", and in some remote villages, this method was also common. Many young people who are physically frail or disabled can rely on their urban hukou to find a beautiful rural girl.
Meilan left the countryside, got a formal position in the health center, and gradually rose to the rank of ** chief, her professional ability is beyond doubt. Indeed it is.
The marriage concept of "saving the country with curves" made Su's mother a city resident, and thus provided a lot of help to her younger brother.
However, Su Mu has to face Su Daqiang, who is selfish, cold, incompetent, timid, and often acts weak, which makes her extremely dissatisfied.
In addition, I am faced with not only time outside of work, but also the basic daily chores of daily life, like living under the same roof and sharing the same bed all our lives.
Life is like a stream of water, which is even denser than the leaves on a tree.
When Su's mother was faced with three meals a year for three hundred and sixty-five days, she suddenly realized that Teacher Su, who had a city hukou, was so incompetent and weak.
After giving birth to three children, Su Daqiang not only had to eat, but also had to wear clothes, and he also needed money for school. At a critical moment when the family is facing difficulties, as the pillar of the family, his only choice is to retreat.
Su's mother is very fond of keeping accounts, and she makes sure that every income and expenditure is recorded in detail. But I have to write down my income and expenses every time, and then calculate the general ledger on a monthly basis. Why do you have such a habit?It's because she feels like a housewife anymore and doesn't need to worry about housework anymore.
You also need to make sure that the husband you marry is someone who doesn't know how to make money. My husband is a very honest and responsible person, and he doesn't like that kind of "big pot rice" life. As a housewife, you not only have to earn money independently, but also learn how to save money from the gaps between your teeth and the waistband of your pants.
In the work "The First Half of My Life", the reason why Luo Zijun was able to "keep his fingers from touching the spring water" was because she had Chen Junsheng behind her who could make money;The reason why Luo Ziqun always brazenly borrows money from his brother-in-law Chen Junsheng is that Chen Junsheng has an incompetent and brutal white light behind him.
If the gentlemen of the Luo family meet Su Daqiang, I am afraid that their lives will be difficult to continue.
Therefore, don't blame Su Mu for being too strong. If Su's mother is as weak as Su Daqiang and goes to the toilet to avoid problems when she encounters problems, how can the Su family have a doctor like Su Mingzhe or a college student like Su Mingyu.
Families with urban hukou alone are not enough to ensure their success, they also need to have a pair of parents who can support the family. Considering your Su Daqiang's incompetence, you can only rely on Su Mu to maintain the status quo.
Such a primitive family not only relies on the right to speak, but more importantly, it needs the ability to actively participate in and deal with various affairs.
In this regard, Su Mu is obviously better than Su Daqiang.
From this point of view, overemphasizing Su Mu's strength and ignoring Su Daqiang's incompetence does this create a certain sense of unfairness to Su Mu?
Su's mother is undoubtedly a hardworking and capable woman, and due to her husband's incompetence and the great pressure of life, she has to show her strength.
Su Mu Meilan is undoubtedly the core figure of the Su family, she not only shows the pathos and limitations of women in that era, but also reflects the perseverance and tenacity of women.
Just taking into account the elderly Su Daqiang, his daily income is as high as fifty, which is equivalent to earning a fortune of two million;If you look at this as a family, then the couple is undoubtedly happy. It is not difficult to imagine how Su's mother spent her days after she got married
Whenever Wu Fei had an argument with Su Mingzhe, his face was always full of anger, which also made people imagine how the young Su Daqiang, who once had huge resources in the city, would be busy at home
It can be easily speculated that the married life of Su Mu and Su Daqiang has also experienced a period of silent endurance.
Only when her position is promoted and her income gradually increases, can she consolidate her position in the family and gain more voice. The couple also went through countless struggles, and finally Su's mother gradually took control of the family's finances, and her own strong personality could effectively control Su Daqiang. Indeed it is.
Observing what Su Daqiang did in his old age, we can clearly see what he looked like when he was young.
In the face of someone like Su Daqiang, you had better communicate with him in depth, he must be a very picky person and is determined to make you pay. He is a very assertive man, and his principle is to figure himself out before he dares to make decisions. When they get into trouble, they choose to pretend to cry, run away, and leave a mess of items for others to deal with.
The person who married Su Daqiang has gone through a lot of hardships and challenges, and although he has a household registration in the city, his talents and vision are limited, and in his eyes, he is the only one.
Leaving aside his failure to fulfill his duties as a father and husband, such a man often becomes a troublemaker, a troublemaker. He didn't know what was wrong with his child, why was it like this?Not only did they not help, but they also created chaos and mended his wounds.
As a **, Su's mother's responsibilities are undoubtedly challenging and busy. Not only does she have to take care of her beloved children, but she also has to do a lot of trivial things for the family. After getting married, Su Daqiang gave birth to two sons. Due to his natural character, he doesn't need to worry about everything at home. Whether it is pregnancy, work or taking care of children, the big and small affairs of the family are all undertaken by Su Daqiang's mother alone.
She is indeed a hardworking and capable woman, and the pressures of life force her to show her strong side.
In married life, due to the lack of care and care from her husband, it is difficult for her husband to take care of the major affairs of the family, which leads to Su's mother's dissatisfaction with marriage and emotional dependence gradually turning to her children.
As the eldest son, Su Mingzhe shoulders Su's mother's deep expectations for her husband's "successful career and emerging career".
As the mother of her second son, Su Mingcheng, her mother has deep expectations for him to "know the cold and the heat, and take care of him intimately".
What Su Mingyu's daughter endured was her mother's deep "hatred" for her marriage, her husband and her original family.
However, such anticipation and comfort do not constitute sincere love, but rather distort the trajectory of the child's life, leaving them deeply trapped in the strong emotional needs of the mother, and failing to shape an independent personality.
In the depths of Su Mu's heart, she didn't want Mingyu to be born. Although this is not Mingyu's fault at all, Su's mother's grievances, depression and unhappiness will unconsciously put the blame on Xiao Mingyu. What she hated was not that she didn't have the courage to file for divorce in the first place, but that the birth of this daughter changed the possibility that she would have had the opportunity to withdraw from this unsatisfactory marriage.
In real life, not all parents often tell you: if it weren't for you, I would have ended my marriage with your parents a long time ago. But in my heart, I still feel that if it weren't for your existence, I wouldn't have the life I have today. I endure humiliation and burden, all out of consideration for you.
When parents are emotionally conflicted, it is often the innocent children who suffer in the end.
Despite Su's strong side, she is also a sympathetic woman.
Su Mu did not have a good impression of Su Daqiang. Does Su Daqiang really have deep feelings for Su Mu?It doesn't have to be this way.
Although Su Daqiang chose the beautiful Su Mu from the countryside. Still, he felt that this was an advantage he deserved, as he held the city's household register.
If he truly loves his wife, then the burden of the family will not fall on Su's mother's shoulders.
As a husband, although you may not be able to earn money, your love and care for you does not cost anything, and you can release it to your wife and children without reservation.
As a husband, you may not need to be tall and mighty, but you are fully capable of being a warm man.
It's a pity that even Su Daqiang didn't.
The children have built their own families and careers, and after retirement, Su's mother turned her interest to playing mahjong.
Some believe that she lost her life by indulging in mahjong.
In fact, only Su Daqiang knew that at the critical moment when Su's mother's life was about to come to an end, whether to choose rescue or not to rescue became the moment when evil thoughts bred in Su Daqiang's heart.
In the entire plot of the play, Su Daqiang is very nervous whenever he mentions Su's mother, and he even said many times that he did not dare to face Su's mother's posthumous photos, let alone live in the old house where they once lived together, and even dared not use the furniture in the old house.
What is the reason behind this?
Su Daqiang, who was seriously ill, summoned his three children to the bedside and revealed to them the real reason for Su's mother's death. It turned out that Su's mother still had a chance to be rescued at that time, just because Su Daqiang was struggling with whether she should call an ambulance?Her family also agreed to let him go to the hospital for emergency treatment. It was precisely because she missed the most suitable time for treatment that Su's mother failed to save her life and died.
In fact, at the beginning of the movie "It's All Good", Mingyu also revealed some things on the way to pick up his eldest brother Su Mingzhe and go home.
After the death of Su's mother, Su Daqiang finally straightened his waist and began his free flight journey.
Su Daqiang was never saddened by the death of his wife, and he soon became interested in the nanny Cai Genhua.
Think about it, even though Sumu is a strong woman, she is more of a sympathetic woman.
Despite her great efforts, her husband never really loved her, and the children did not give her the response she deserved, and her daughter Su Mingyu even expressed her understanding.
In the work "It's All Good", she only appears in a handful of episodes, and she doesn't even have a chance to explain it, except that her strong and patriarchal characteristics are repeatedly emphasized.
Fortunately, near the end of the play, Su Mingyu recalled the scene when her mother hugged her tightly when she was a child, and learned that what her mother said in the last moments of her life was: Mingyu, you better go home.
Su Mingyu sat on the ground, crying silently.
However, it was already too late.
It is best to cherish this family affection when your parents are still alive and your family affection is still there.