When getting along with lovers, we will inevitably encounter problems of one kind or another. Sometimes when we are emotionally upset, we will act more or less inappropriately.
For example: directly blaming the other person. Many people think that this is a sign of taking the other person into account, and some people think that it is a way to communicate honestly, but compared to "direct accusation", in fact, some seemingly indirect and innocuous behaviors are actually the chronic poison that kills your feelings.
Neglect. Habitually filtering out ideas and opinions that are different from your own, such situations occur most often when two people quarrel, such as: "What you say is not important", "You listen to me first".
In fact, this is also a reaction based on human instinct, because normally, everyone must be more willing to hear each other's explanations and opinions have an agreement.
But what we need to understand is that "if you care about them, you care about them", and communicating with your partner is about solving the problem at hand, not a debate where there is a "win or lose".
Putting the other person down. 
This is especially undesirable behavior in intimate relationships, and can even be described as "bad" behavior. For example, calling someone "stupid" or saying something inappropriate and arrogant, "You don't even know this."
Love is the premise of each other's beginning, respect is the basis of love, if there is no respect, it cannot be called "love". True love is about respecting and understanding each other's differences and differences, and making progress together.
Evade. When communicating, being silent, not responding, and unwilling to take out the problem to solve it often manifests as "I'm in a bad mood today, I don't want to say this" or "I have nothing to say".
At this time, it is not applicable to put "escape is shameful, but escape is useful" here. Because in a relationship, escaping will only allow contradictions and problems to accumulate, and solving the problems in time is also what a mature lover should do.
Exonerate yourself.
When problems arise, the blame is put on the other party, often this is also the person we mentioned in the previous paragraph "evasion, and inaction", and think that it is caused by the immaturity of the other party, but in fact, habitually exonerating oneself is the real immature behavior.
A good relationship will not let the other party bear the consequences of mistakes alone, and when you see the other person struggling, you are willing to share and give love.
Unwilling to back down. It can be said that most relationships will go through run-ins and ups and downs, so what we do when we go through ups and downs is particularly important.
Often the so-called "evenly matched" love requires someone to know how to change and retreat, because there is no one born to match.
Concession does not mean that we should be tolerant of everything, but principled and measured.
When getting along with lovers, we will inevitably experience quarrels, disagreements, and moments of complaining and blaming each other, when this happens.
We need to remember that a sober analysis is far more acceptable than endless bickering, and a better option to solve the problem. Try to empathize, after all, in love, there is no winning or losing.
