The first lesson of the new year No need to suggest, just see, whether this sentence is also a kind of advice, when we want to persuade others, accompany others, educate others, whether we often fall into a high sense of morality and arrogance, we want to tell others what to do, and ignore that maybe at that moment, the other party needs more understanding and companionship.
Just like the story told by Zhuangzi in the world, Confucius's ** Yan Hui wanted to go to Wei and ask Confucius for advice on how to use what he had learned in his life to help Wei State, Confucius was worried that Yan Hui would be beaten for insisting on his own views, but he finally asked Yan Hui, do you want to do what you plan to do, Yan Hui said a lot of truths, and Zhuangzi is also ** Zhuangzi believes that the best state is to be in a state of form, to be peaceful, to be obedient on the outside, and to be lenient on the inside, if we want to get closer to others and speak the right truth, but not close enough, it is difficult to have an effect.
When educating children, if we try to reason with them, although we can make them understand the reason, but we may not be able to make them understand us, just like my friend told me, although he knows that I need companionship, but at that moment what we need more is understanding and trust, we need to see first, Understand the other party, in order to give advice, if you just want to show your sense of morality and arrogance, give advice may make the other party more confused, in Zen Buddhism, the master also told the way of drinking, at the most appropriate time to an important point, to initiate, to wake people up, but if the time has not come, or the other party has been obsessed, we should not say the stick, but should accompany him, let him wake up by himself, so no need to suggest, just see, when we know how to let go of their own advice, to understand and accompany each other, maybe we can really give help and enlightenment。