At the end of the year, it's always good to look back at what you've learned from the past year before you start looking ahead to next year. For many, the past few years have made us feel like we'd rather not remember what happened, but it's okay to feel that way. Whether you love or hate the past, it changes you in some way.
People are social creatures, and the drive and desire to connect with each other is essential to our mental and emotional well-being. As our world continues to advance technologically, the skills that older generations need to develop when starting their careers are very different from those that today's young people need to develop.
The most important skill that young people in today's world need to focus on is the art of communication. Being a good communicator means being able to listen to others and respond thoughtfully and effectively, but that's only one aspect of good communication. Other aspects are being able to decipher body language, pay attention to timing and tone, and identify with whom you will express certain thoughts and opinions.
We develop these skills and learn how to handle relationships through school, family and social activities. Due to the rise of technology and the availability of information, young people have had to rely less and less on school, home, and social activities to develop interpersonal skills.
For example, if you wanted to learn origami 40 years ago, you could certainly learn from books or teaching**, but what is certain is that the teacher will help you take origami to a high level. Today, if you want to learn origami, you don't have to talk to another person. There are many benefits to the convenience and accessibility of so much information. The downside is the loss of the importance of building and nurturing relationships.
During the corona pandemic, everything was done online. While we all stay connected electronically, it's hard to stay connected emotionally. Young people in high school and college miss out on a critical period for developing communication and interpersonal skills. These young people are slowly moving into an awkward workforce, which means they simply won't get as many opportunities to practice and learn these skills as they did in the past.
For some, the idea of learning how to communicate better may seem a bit outdated. We have all this technology that offers simplicity and convenience, so why get yourself bogged down in lengthy communications?Learning the art of communication isn't about denying the progress we've made or wanting to go back to the "good old days," but rather about developing a skill that will not only help you succeed at work, but also help you connect with other people in a meaningful way. Building meaningful relationships and connections with others is an important aspect of a happy life.
Learning to be a better communicator can feel like a daunting task, so you can start practicing these four movements with or without a conversation partner:
1.Know yourself.
It may seem like a strange start, but an important part of being a good communication partner is understanding yourself and how you function and respecting those parts of yourself rather than trying to change them. Are you an introvert who has a hard time opening up?Don't blame yourself for being shy or having trouble starting a conversation;Be aware of this and make sure you always have some conversation starters ready. Or simply put, "I find these social activities really overwhelming because I tend to be quite a conservative person." What about you?”
2.Practice active listening.
Most people think that being a good listener means that you don't talk. Listening isn't just about "not talking." Listening, or active listening, is the observation that the other person is speaking and is fully focused on what the other person is saying. This requires you to stop everything else you are currently doing, make good eye contact and face the other person. Practicing active listening is all about learning how to redirect your attention to the other person every time your mind wanders while trying to listen.
We've all talked to our bosses or co-workers, but we know they haven't heard a single word of what we've said. The feeling of not being heard is never a good feeling. Keep in mind that when you're talking to someone and multitasking, you might check off something from your checklist, but you're not building a trusting relationship with the person you're talking to at this point.
3.Be curious.
To be good at the art of conversation, you don't have to say the most prolific or witty things all the time;You just need to be curious. People love to talk about themselves, and asking sharp and interesting questions always makes the other person in the conversation feel special, thus creating a connection.
Be curious about other aspects of life as well. Are you a big reader?Do you only read one genre of books or are you curious about other authors and genres?Do you always go to the same place, or are you curious about other neighborhoods, restaurants, and shops?
Being a good communicator means you can add interesting facts, stories, and tidbits to the conversation. The more books, movies, plays you've read or watched, and the more experiences you've had, the more general stuff you need to talk about.
4.Trust you to be someone worth talking to.
For many people, it is not the other person who prevents them from "knowing themselves" and enjoying pleasant communication, but themselves. This is themselves and their inner critics. When you're talking to another person, it's easy to just be anxious about yourself and worry about what the other person is thinking. You wonder if you're funny, or if their smile is hiding their true feelings, when in fact they think you're boring and can't stand talking to you.
While you have to be mindful of the other person's body language and be able to sense if something you say (or want to say) is causing the other person to feel uncomfortable, you also don't have to be responsible for how the other person feels and what they think. People spend too much time listening to their inner critics in their heads, trying to figure out what the other person is thinking, rather than living in the moment, listening to what the other person is saying and responding in a sincere way.
Even with the rise of artificial intelligence and the fear of "robots" taking over the world, humans still need companions. Learning how to build and maintain healthy, authentic relationships never goes away. If you want to succeed in your career and life, consider building relationships and having enjoyable conversations as your most valuable asset.