Among the stories that people often hear, there is a legend about a hard-working woman who married a lazy man. One day the woman went out, and she gave the lazy man a huge baked cake that he could eat for seven or eight days. However, when the woman returned home, she was surprised to find that the roasted cake had only been bitten and that the lazy man had starved to death. This may seem like an exaggeration, but in fact, there is a similar story that takes place in Luoshan County, Xinyang City, Henan Province, China.
The protagonist of this story is Yang Suo, known as "the first lazy man in the world". His family lives in Baoan Village, Zhutang Township, and has been extremely doted on by his parents since he was a child, and was even named "Yang Suo" in the hope of keeping him forever.
When Yang Suo was eight years old, his parents had to carry him out on a burden and prevent him from walking on his own. His elementary school teacher said that although Yang Suo was smart, he didn't pay attention to class and didn't do his homework. As long as the teacher scolded him, Yang Suo's parents would complain the next day.
At the age of thirteen, Yang Suo's father died of illness, but even when his mother was gone, he was not required to work in the fields. At the age of eighteen, his mother also died of illness. After losing his parents, someone took him out to work, but he was tired and didn't last a few days before returning home.
After returning home, Yang Suo had no life**, so he could only sell all the valuable things at home. When the money ran out, he began to beg from house to house for food, sleeping when he was full, sometimes even sleeping for a day or two in a row.
Yang Suo slept every day, and the kind-hearted villagers feared that he would starve to death, so they hung vegetables and meat under the eaves for him. But Yang Suo would rather go hungry and not even bother to open the door and let the food rot and stink.
It is known that he never washes his clothes and throws them away when they are dirty. When it's cold, because I don't want to go out to the toilet, I dig a hole at home like an animal and cover it with soil after defecation. In order to keep warm, he burned everything he could in his house, and eventually even his bed was burned.
After Yang Suo's death, many netizens labeled him differently, calling him "the best in the world" and "the laziest in the world". Behind this nonsensical and dark humor truth, we also see the tragic ending of parents' extreme doting on their children.
It's not just Yang Suo, there is a similar news: a mother raised her son with hard work, and her son found a job soon after graduating from college. However, he quit after less than a month of work each time, complaining that the work was too tiring and the task too heavy to bear. Two years passed, and the son was comfortably idle at home, either playing games or using his mother's modest salary to spend time outside.
In the face of his mother's accusations, he said confidently: "If you can't support me for the rest of your life, why have you been so spoiled to me since childhood?"”
Sima Guang once said: "A mother does not suffer from unkindness, and suffers from knowing love but not knowing how to teach." "As a mother, you don't have to worry about whether you are loving enough, but you have to worry about whether you only know how to love your children and not how to educate them.
If Yang Suo's parents could understand this sentence as soon as possible, maybe such an absurd and sad story would not have happened.
A parent's love for their children is unconditional, but the way to truly love their children is to think of them and not simply indulge them. Today the child is lazy and unwilling to work hard, you are soft-hearted and give in, tomorrow he will not be able to gain a foothold in society, can you always provide for him?Today your child makes unreasonable demands, and you are soft-hearted to meet him, and tomorrow he will make even more excessive demands, what can you do?
Children will eventually grow up, and parents will eventually leave. Love is the natural instinct of all parents, but knowing how to be tough when necessary is also a manifestation of wisdom. The road to growth is full of hardships, and only children who have the courage to leave their comfort zone can spread their wings and fly.
As parents, we love our children deeply, but we also need to be "ruthless". I hope that this "ruthlessness" can make children be treated gently in this world.
The story of Yang Suo and his parents, as well as the young man who had nothing to do after graduating from college, triggered me to think about family education and parental doting.
Yang Suo in the story is an extreme example of the negative impact of doting on a child's development. He was overly spoiled by his parents since he was a child, and he did not learn to take care of himself and take responsibility. This excessive pampering led him to fall into a situation where he could not extricate himself after the loss of his parents, and eventually led to tragedy. This is a thought-provoking example that highlights the extremes that parents need to be aware of in the process of educating their children.
This story also evoked my reflection on modern society. In today's society, parents tend to spoil their children too much and let them go unrestricted. This behavior may stem from an expression of love for a child, but when that love becomes indulgent and doting, the consequences can be catastrophic. Children who grow up in this environment may lack self-discipline, self-confidence, and responsibility, causing them to be unable to adapt and cope when faced with life's challenges and pressures.
This story also calls us to reflect on the nature of education. The responsibility of parents is not only to love and protect their children, but also to teach them how to live independently and responsibly. Pampering and spoiling is far less than educating children with the right values and codes of conduct. This does not mean that children should be treated harshly, but that they should be given appropriate guidance and restraint on the basis of love, and that their self-management and problem-solving skills should be cultivated.
In another story, the young man, who had nothing to do after graduating from college, showed an ungrateful attitude towards his mother's doting. This mindset reflects a misconception that parental doting is taken for granted and ignores the ability to grow and take responsibility for oneself. This is another negative effect of spoiling, and children may grow up lacking in gratitude for their parents' efforts and awareness of social responsibility.
To sum up, parents should find a balance between love and education. Although parents' love for their children is unconditional, in the process of educating children, care should be taken to avoid excessive spoiling and cultivate children's qualities of independent thinking, self-management and responsibility. Only in this way can children better adapt to society and grow into self-reliant people.
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