There is a lethal nature in marriage**, a foolish question, a good answer
Recently, things have been going on in my house.
For example, yesterday at noon, I brought home a bag of melon seeds, and when he saw it, he asked me curiously, "Why did you buy so many melon seeds?"”
I replied, "For the winter, of course." ”
He then asked, "What kind of winter can these melon seeds have?"”
I was a little speechless: "This is a redundant question. What else can melon seeds be used for?Of course, I ate it!You're 504 months old, do you still need me to explain the role of melon seeds?”
He just said "oh" and walked away.
Yesterday I was in a good mood and made two delicious dishes for him in order to create a pleasant atmosphere for the weekend.
However, my husband slept all afternoon.
It was almost evening when he felt his stomach and walked leisurely to the kitchen.
I'm stir-frying, and the rice in the rice cooker has already been cooked. He stood aside and asked me, "The rice is ready, do you want to serve it?"”
I made a dish of lamb with cumin, a dish of braised pork ribs, and I was in a hurry, and the kitchen was already like it had been bombed. I was frowning about how to clean up for a while, but he asked coldly.
I replied, "Of course." ”
Then he asked, "Which bowl to serve?"”
I jokingly said, "Don't serve it, let's eat it in a pot!".”
He said strangely: "What kind of international jokes, hugging the pot to eat, the heads of the three of us can't get together." ”
I couldn't take it anymore, so I grabbed a shovel and grabbed a big rice spoon, jumped to the side, pointed at him and said, "I really want to destroy you on behalf of the moon!".”
He said angrily, "You are so naïve!".”
At night, he hit ** on the balcony, and when it was over, he ran to the bedroom and asked me: "The washing machine has stopped, I will dry the clothes." ”
I replied, "No, wait until those clothes are in there." ”
He said angrily, "Can't you just talk properly?".”
I asked rhetorically: "After the washing machine washes the clothes, of course they have to be dried, and you have to ask me about this."”
His brain circuit seemed to be out of track, and he said, "How do I know what else you have planned for these clothes?".”
This sentence really left me speechless.
Could it be that these clothes are washed and not taken out, and I still keep them and fall in love with the washing machine?
All I could say was, "Go out and cool off." ”
He came to me again and asked, "I'm tired of eating, I want to go out for a walk, I see that the kitchen garbage basket is full, should I take it out?"”
I don't want to talk to him at all.
He looked at me and turned a deaf ear, and taunted me about how my temper had become so incomprehensible and not at all soft.
I replied that if you want me to be soft, you have to show what it takes to conquer me. Every time you're at home, always ask stupid questions, don't you have a little life skills?Do you have to wait for me to answer everything?
He heard me angry, and war was about to break out.
Then he said: If in ancient times, I became an emperor, with your character, don't think of entering my harem. Guess what I'm going to do with you?
I replied, "Thank you, I'd rather be exiled to Ningguta than serve you."
He said: No, I'm a person with a pattern!
I thought he was going to call me Mama.
He said, "According to your specialty, I will make you a sword guard in front of the king, because you look stronger!".
I was speechless for a moment, oh my God, how did I find a partner?
I've done the math, we've been married for almost 14 years, and we've had more than two seven-year itches, so why does it feel like it's getting more and more twisted these days?
I couldn't make out his stupid question, he complained about my rebuttal answers, and said that I was a national level bar, and never listened to what he said, and he said that in the future, at home, he must wear a lightning rod on his head, so as not to be hurt by his heart as soon as he opened his mouth.
Half a day passed, and he always felt that he was a victim.
A lot of the time, it's not that I have a lot of business, but my husband basically doesn't have a clue when he talks to me. I once talked to him about this in earnest, and his answer was: home is where I rest, where I completely let my guard down, and of course I don't talk about it anymore.
I tried to understand him.
This morning, I got up early and cooked millet porridge for him, because he didn't look good lately, and I added some red dates.
I put all the rice and oil in his bowl and told him to get up and eat.
My husband procrastinated, looked at it, and asked me: Why are you cooking millet porridge?
I glared at him, and he didn't notice it at all.
After sitting down, he was still not idle, and said to himself: Why are you putting dates?
Of course, it's for food, do you need me to explain it again?
But I restrained myself, and I suddenly didn't want to quarrel with him, because I began to understand that everyone has their own cognition, and they all think from their own cognition, and no matter how much they say, it is just a quarrel. So I smiled and said: Wow, you are so amazing, you are so good, you can still see that this is millet porridge and red dates!
My husband was silent right away.
Lately, I've been thinking about what is the essence of marriageWhy do many couples often have conflicts over trivial matters?Everyone is blaming each other, why can't we communicate calmly?The public says that the public is reasonable, and the mother-in-law says that the mother-in-law is reasonable, but the root of the problem still lies in the difference in the cognition of the two sides.
However, the way we communicate with each other sometimes becomes an internal friction that gradually drains the vitality of the marriage.
I learned that most men hate women like to raise the bar, no matter what the man says, the woman is Xi to retort, refuse to agree, unwilling to obey, and unwilling to give face.
I'm one of those women, but I'm often angry because of his "goof-and-goof" questions.
At home, I have to help my kids with their homework, do their laundry, cook, clean up, and organize the family's affairs, all the while constantly answering his crazy questions.
Whenever I get angry, my husband is like a big boy, he doesn't say anything when he's in a good mood, and he scolds me when he's in a bad mood.
The two of us are like two mines, one explodes, and the other has to be silent. We must maintain this balance, otherwise we will have to part ways long ago because of "emotional discord and no common language".
The key to the reason why we have come so far lies in three words: "no cold war"!
Although we have quarreled and had conflicts, we have never carried resentment**, let alone extended the dispute into the night. We have always avoided a situation like a master in the East House and an abbot in the West House.