As the saying goes, where there are people, there are rivers and lakes. In this complex society, we inevitably have to deal with people. In this process, human feelings have become an important part of our work and life. It can not only make us feel the warmth and joy of the world, but also bring endless troubles and sorrows.
The sophistication of human feelings comes from Song Wen Tianxiang's "Sending the Monk to the Preface": "Let me entrust it with the sophistication of human feelings." Ming Feng Menglong's "Xingshi Hengyan" Volume 21: "It's a pity that you are full of articles and can't see the sophistication of human feelings. "It mostly refers to the methods, principles and experiences of dealing with the world, and modern times are mostly linked to people's emotional intelligence and wisdom.
Human affection refers to the feelings between people, and sophistication refers to these things in the world, recognizing different rules and etiquette, and understanding both people and things. In the world, people who handle human affairs well are often smooth in life and career, and they get both money and fame. On the contrary, people who don't understand the world of human feelings are not necessarily having a bad time, but the people around them use the favors they approve of to demand a person who has an opinion and does not want to be assimilated.
Since I was a child, my mother said to me, "All the world's feelings and sophistication must be maintained with money." "At first, I didn't think much of my mother's words, thinking that it was only for people who were not related by blood, and that the real relationship between relatives was family affection rather than cheesy money, until in the process of growing up, one by one real things completely subverted my original cognition and understood the realm of human affection.
We need to understand the relationship between people, we must also know how to understand the emotions and needs of others, and we must know how to build good relationships with others.
The mother is the eldest at home, and the following are the four younger brothers, all of whom are in the suburbs, which belong to the junction of urban and rural areas. Because her mother married her father, who was a soldier, she went to the city with the army to settle down. My grandfather died early, leaving only my grandmother to work hard to raise 5 children. My mother is very filial, and she has to go back to visit her grandmother every month, and go to her brother's house by the way. In the seventies, my parents' salaries were not high, and they had to raise 3 children and in-laws, and life was very poor. The mother always used the money she saved between her teeth to buy some sweets and pastries and distribute them among her younger brothers' children. Every time my mother returned to her hometown, the nephews and nieces cheered and enjoyed the food. Every time my nephew came to my house as a guest, my mother would entertain me with good food and food, and before leaving, she would stuff my nephew with a few cents to buy candy to eat. On the birthdays of my younger brothers and children, my mother would always send congratulatory gifts. I usually cook some food and share it with my neighbors, and my mother does a good job of being sophisticated, and she gets along very well not only with relatives but also with neighbors and friends.
However, human sophistication sometimes brings us a lot of trouble. When dealing with interpersonal relationships, we often feel overwhelmed for a variety of reasons. Sometimes we care too much about other people's eyes and don't know what to do; Sometimes we don't know how to say no and take on too much pressure; Sometimes we are more troubled by the difficulty of handling interpersonal relationships.
Friends who work in the agency know that office work requires more sophistication than business offices. Office work is close to the leader, and speech and behavior must know the rules and pay attention to language arts. I remember once following the leader to the grassroots to supervise the work, and the whole work was carried out smoothly. After the work was over, the leaders of the inspected unit warmly sent us to the door, and the leaders shook hands with them one by one, said goodbye, and then got into the car. Several of us shook hands with them one after another and said goodbye, and I was the last, and naturally the last. After the car drove for a while, the leader reprimanded me and said, "I have already shaken hands with everyone on the other side, do you still need to shake hands one by one to say goodbye?" You should follow me and get in the car right away. "I was shocked into a cold sweat after hearing this, thinking that every process was done well, but I didn't pay attention to this link and ignored the role position. Then, from this matter of human feelings, we must learn to deal with problems flexibly, learn to look at things from different angles, and learn to adapt to changes in the environment as soon as possible.
Another time, I couldn't help but complain to another colleague because I was dissatisfied with my boss's work, and said a few words of last resort. Unbeknownst to him, the colleague then spread this to the ears of his boss, causing him to hold a grudge and keep holding grudges, resulting in suppression everywhere in his future work. However, sometimes we have enough human feelings, but occasionally a loss of control can also lead to unpredictable results.
In this ever-changing world, people are constantly changing. We can't just rely on past experience and wisdom to deal with all problems, but we need to continue to Xi learn and think, and constantly improve our emotional intelligence and interpersonal skills. Only in this way can we be more comfortable with people and be happier and more satisfied in life.
In general, human sophistication is a kind of wisdom in the world, which can not only make us feel the warmth and joy of the world, but also bring endless troubles and sorrows. However, only through continuous tempering can we better cope with various challenges and variables in life, and truly appreciate the mystery and value of human feelings. In the process, we will also continue to grow and improve, becoming more mature and confident people.