One.
I strolled down the university garden. No matter how you look at this little garden, it is not as good as my house, it is deserted. I couldn't help but yawn, "It's so cold." ”
My parents have been strict with me since I was a child. When I was in junior high school, my parents bought a school district house in a noisy old neighborhood so that I could go to school closer to home so that they could "supervise". The house is on the top floor, with three bedrooms and two living rooms and a terrace. The house is an old dormitory renovation, surrounded by almost modern high-rise buildings, the sun is not too good, lying on the bed in the bedroom looking out the window, as if crowded in the subway full of adults, cramped, depressing. Living in this house, it is only a 200-meter alley away from getting up early to go to school, and after school at noon, you can go to the restaurant owned by your parents first and have lunch with them. This is convenient, and I can accept it.
One summer day, on a whim, my father said that he wanted to turn the rooftop terrace into a sky garden, just like his neighbor on the top floor of the next building. Just do it. I was busy moving bricks, erecting flower sheds, and laying hay all summer vacation. Although I was tired, I felt that it was worth it to see that the once insulated and bare desolate terrace has slowly become a leisurely space full of flowers and plants, and cats and dogs are at peace. That summer, my mother and I planted passion fruit on the renovated rooftop, and from under the trellis, we watched the vines and fruits snuggling up to each other and covering the clear sky. Between the high-rise buildings, you can see a stone bridge, and the stream under the bridge is murmuring, converging to the sea not far away.
The days of a family of three enjoying themselves in the garden are vivid. I always want to have this kind of time. However, four or five years passed in the blink of an eye.
Your dad and I have business to be busy, and you're in your third year of high school, so we don't have to quarrel with you around, and you can be quiet and study hard. You're going to be free, no one cares about you." My mother said to me jokingly during a dinner party. I bowed my head and didn't speak.
My parents went to another city, and I started living on my own. Every weekend at dusk, I always come to the rooftop garden, facing the pale blue sky, the stone bridge, and the creek to empty my mind, so that my soul can get a short peace in this small corner. The wind is like an ancient string, gently playing a melody that seems to be free.
Is it free?I always feel like something is missing." Listening to the wind, thinking of my mother's words, and thinking of the ditches and bumps I have encountered in my life and study recently, I feel like a lost child in a subway car, helpless and panicked.
I don't know if it's out of a sense of accomplishment or loneliness, I always show off my hideaway with my classmates and invite them to my home. Gradually, the rooftop garden became a gathering place for me and my friends. We are here to share each other's feelings, to pour out the confusion of life, and to express some longing ......
Sitting on a chair in the school garden, I stared at the small pool in a daze, reminiscing about the past. There was a roar in the sky. I casually looked up and saw a plane sailing in the clouds. It should be full of hopes.
He ......I guess I'm really free. I said to myself.
Two. Because of the low terrain in the garden on the rooftop of my house, I don't know which naughty boy always uses my garden as an amusement park, and colorful paper airplanes are scattered all over the ground. Later, my rocking chair became a target and a tarmac.
Hey - people upstairs listen, don't throw the plane here again!It's annoying, okay?"I shouted at the adjacent high-rise apartment diagonally opposite, picked up the blue one on the ground, and threw it in the direction of the stone bridge stream. The moment I held the plane in my hand, I felt inexplicably relaxed and happy.
L, my high school friend and dinner partner, and H's playmate from childhood to adulthood.
h His parents divorced early and grew up with his grandmother since he was a child. Then his grandmother got sick and left, and he changed. That night, there was a farce about H in the class, and L said to me, "H seems to have told him, what kind of bipolar disorder does he have?"I forgot, maybe he was thinking too much about it. ”
About H, we didn't know each other well at first. He made a bad impression on me. Puppy love, fights, unclean mouths, in short, are things that I think only bad students can do. That farce is that he broke up with our female squad leader, a well-known couple. Perhaps he felt ridiculous, or perhaps he couldn't pull it off, and he began to slap his mouth like crazy in class, his face gradually becoming red and swollen, mixed with snot and tears. I think it's incredible. In this life, I should not become a close friend with such a person.
One afternoon after school, very suddenly, H came to me: "I heard that your house has a rooftop, with flowers and plants, as well as cats and dogs, I want to go and see." ”
Let's go, I'll take you upstairs and have a look. I'll have something to do later. "At first, I just wanted to send him away.
Going upstairs, H stood for a while, thoughtfully, and looked around. When you see a kitten, you immediately squat down and pet them.
It turns out that you also like cats. I still remember the last time we had dinner with L, there was a cat bullied by 3 children at the door, and you ran to stop him. I struck up a conversation with him.
I think the critters are carefree. He didn't look up, and he didn't stop moving.
A paper airplane flew silently, piercing the silent air. He picked it up, opened it, and sat down in my rocking chair.
Sometimes, I feel so tired of living, but it's still so comfortable, warm and free. He lay on the chair for a long time and sighed, "I feel very relieved to be with these little guys who can't speak." ”
Before that, although he and I knew each other, we didn't talk much and knew each other very little. But from this afternoon on, we seemed to have become close friends.
I ...... when I was a kid”
My parents ......”
My grandmother ......”
I always seem to be crazy......”
The college entrance examination is very stressful......I don't want to disappoint the people who love me......”
I don't remember exactly what we talked about, except that he seemed to tell me everything about him, and we talked until dark.
Hey - stop throwing planes here, people are annoying!He stood up and shouted at the tall building, folding the paper back into the shape of an airplane and throwing it at the stone bridge.
You see, how comfortable it is, and although it will land sooner or later, you can enjoy at least the feeling of flying happily in the air once. His eyes followed the plane, "The first time I saw you, I thought you were a good person, as if you could help me, and I don't know why." It feels like we're alike."
Three. H became a regular visitor to the rooftop garden. He made it his home.
As we drank tea and chatted together, I suddenly understood that he and I really had similarities, and we both hoped to find the strength of life in companionship, such as understanding, comfort and support.
He talked about his life, his dreams, his illness, and let me understand the struggles of his heart. Every time he laughs, it's like looking for light in the darkness. Every time he shouted, it was like looking for warmth in the cold. I laughed with him, yelled together, and released the negative emotions together in the day and night of the rooftop garden.
In life, in fact, there don't seem to be so many troubles. Instead of dwelling on this or that, it's enough to leave everything behind and do what you want to do well, right?"H asked me. When he looked up at the sky, tears glistened in his eyes. It is the light of gratitude, the light that shines from the haze of the heart, shining on the love of life and the expectation of the future.
Uh-huh, just do your best. "I looked at him like a mirror and saw the fragility and strength of each of us in our hearts when we were young.
Hey, it's all your fault, the shout a few months ago scared me so much that no one dared to throw paper airplanes at me anymore. ”
H said, "I'm sorry, I just love the feeling of being free-flying. ”
Come, I'll fold it with you, put it together. "It dawned on me.
Once again, the rooftop is covered with colorful paper airplanes, as gorgeous as the papaya fruits in the garden.
Come on for the college entrance examination!My friend. ”
Come on, thank you, my dear friend!”
Paper airplanes soar in the blue sky, draw beautiful arcs, and fly to stone bridges, streams, seas, and the vast world of the future with our dreams one after another.
Four. I was admitted to a university in Guangdong, but I failed the college entrance examination and chose to fight again. Due to the different trajectories of our lives, I lost contact with H for a while. Later, I took a year off due to illnessI also heard that H was admitted to the university of his choice with high scores, and I was happy for him.
It's good, it's still interesting from the old days, I don't know how he's doing now. "Sitting in the garden of the school, watching the planes fly farther and farther away and gradually disappear between the clouds, I suddenly began to feel a little sad and lost again. Graduation is approaching, where should I go from here?
I got up and prepared to leave this cold place.
Tsubaki!A familiar voice came from behind me.
I jerked my head back.
Long time no see. How about let's go put paper airplanes together?”
*: China Youth Daily client.