The best way for middle-aged people to live should be low in material, high in family, and top in spirit
A rich life and a colorful life.
In college, I took a course in management, and one of the professors, who was over half a hundred years old, shared his unique insight into Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
He stood in front of the podium, pointed to the ** on the projector, and told us: "Life is limited, and you can't take care of it infinitely. We must understand what is most important, do not pursue material things excessively, but should manage the family more attentively and pay attention to the richness of the spiritual world. ”
Looking back now, I gradually realize the profound meaning of what the professor said back then:
Moderate materiality, sublimation of the family, and careful nourishment of the heart are the ways to pursue a better life. ”
Moderate substances
Hemingway once said that in this age of luxury and waste, people really need very few things.
As people reach middle age, screening out unimportant clutter also means letting go of some burdens.
In the winter of 1956, the philosopher Li Zehou published a series of articles in Philosophical Research, with a total manuscript fee of 1,000 yuan.
Although at that time, this amount was quite considerable for him, and the monthly salary was only about 60 yuan.
Despite the economic upturn, he continued to live a simple life: he didn't want designer clothes or watches.
Someone suggested that he buy some designer shirts, but he politely declined, "Famous brands will become a burden." ”
He devoted himself to his career and wrote books such as "The Course of Beauty" and "On the History of Modern Chinese Thought".
In the era of rampant materialism, many people are bound by material things, and unconsciously, the things they pursue have become the shackles of life, and the soul is also tied up for no reason.
The ancient Greek philosopher Epicotita said that one's happiness should come from being as little dependent on external material things as possible.
Chuck Feeney, the founder of Globe Duty Free Group, is a world-renowned billionaire, yet he has always adhered to a modest lifestyle.
He was in charge of all kinds of luxuries, but he still had a simple life: his glasses were bought from the grocery store, the cheap watch on his wrist came from a stall, and he insisted that the $10 watch was just as accurate in time.
He doesn't have a car, relies on public transportation for his commute, and often carries plastic bags for documents.
Living in an ordinary San Francisco apartment, the layout is simple, with inkjet printing on the wall**, and the desk is a shabby wood.
This is the "simple way" of the rich Chuck Feeney, who lives in lightness without the trouble of complicated things;There is no attachment to irrelevant desires, and a simple but fulfilling life.
Family comes first
A psychologist has come up with the "paradox of choice":
While happiness means freedom and choice, more choice and freedom do not lead to more happiness. On the contrary, the more choices, the less happiness.
It also implies that every object around us carries a certain burden.
In our teenage years, we pursue material prosperity, but as we grow older, we gradually learn to cut back.
Ditching unimportant distractions and focusing on a streamlined life leaves more room for life.
Lin Yutang once said that the ideal family life should have a warm and pleasant wife, and a few cute children who can run with you in the heavy rain.
He devoted his life to this ideal.
Since his marriage, he has devoted almost all of his time to his family, except for writing.
Lin Yutang often makes small and delicate gifts for the children, using clay and candles, and blowing soap bubbles with them.
When they were poor, he and his wife would divide every penny in two. When life settles down, they enjoy a good life.
They will also have quarrels, but Lin Yutang always takes the initiative to make his wife happy.
On the occasion of the 50th wedding anniversary, Lin Yutang specially made a brooch of "Golden Jade Yuan" for his wife, and engraved the poem "Old Lover" by Moes Whitkan Lelay to pay tribute to his wife.
When people reach middle age, they will realize that the family is the most important career, and the careful management of the family determines the happiness of the family's life.
The glass king Cao Dewang once had an extramarital affair and asked for a divorce.
However, the wife said, "I know I am not worthy of you, and I know that you will leave, so leave the house and the three children to me." ”
These words made Cao Dewang think deeply.
He did not make hasty decisions, but delved into the married life of others, searched for various marriage cases, and finally understood:
There is no such thing as a completely happy family, and as a man, you should take on family responsibilities to make your family happy and glorious.
Zhou Guoping once said that home is a small boat that will carry us through a long time.
When I was young, I thought that the world was infinite, and when I was older, I realized that home is the only place to belong.
Instead of running around, it is better to spend more time taking care of the family and raising children.
Spiritual top
There is a scene in The Shawshank Redemption that is impressive.
The main character, Andy, was imprisoned by the warden for two weeks because he played a classical song in prison. After being released from prison, he was in good spirits, as if he had experienced a wonderful vacation.
Others thought it was extremely difficult to be alone in prison, but Andy said it was the most comfortable time he spent in prison.
He told the other prisoners that because of Mozart's ** company, the notes reverberated in his heart and became a precious treasure that would never be taken away.
It is often said that"When the soul loses its refuge, the rain drenches the heart. "
In our lives, what we need is not only the habitat of the body, but also the pure land of the soul.
Whether it is calligraphy, painting, piano and chess, or various artistic expressions, we all need a love to enrich our hearts and enrich our lives.
There is a quote from Flaubert that hangs on Mu Xin's desk: "The vastness of art is enough to contain one person." ”
For him, the earthly land is just his refuge, and the true paradise lies in the infinite and vast spiritual world.
In the sixties, Mu Xin was unjustly imprisoned in a dark and damp air-raid shelter, and could only feed on sour steamed buns and moldy pickles every day. As soon as the food arrived, the flies came flooding, and before the food was moved, it was already eaten by flies and dogs.
Despite such a sinister fate, Mu Xin still looked up at the starlight in the dark cave.
He secretly drew black keys on the confession paper and played melodious notes on the silent keyboard.
Every night, he writes thousands of words of notes, with beautiful poems, deep thoughts, and swims in the infinite world of words.
When Mu Xin walked out of prison, people thought he must be ragged and emaciated.
However, in that snowy winter, Mu Xin walked out upright, smiling, spotless, and extremely elegant.
Liang Wendao saw Mu Xin's ** when he was in his fifties, but found that there was no trace of suffering on it.
He was amazed: "It's not at all like a person who has ever been in prison, it's incredible." ”
When the mind is barren, life becomes mediocre.
And a person with a rich heart can live a life of variety and splendor.
Only those who know how to nourish the soul can not be assimilated by the world and not succumbed to suffering in a monotonous and boring day.
As the saying goes, every piece of wood can be carved into a Buddha statue, just remove the excess.
It's the same with life.
After half a life, he is streamlined and tedious, not chasing material things, but putting his energy into meaningful things and living the life he wants.
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